


This Little Light of Mine

by Starra



Category: Banana Fish (Anime & Manga)
Genre: All PTSD and anxiety issues are related to canonical events, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Alternate Universe - Post-Canon, Anxiety, Ash has been through a lot but he's trying, Babies, Birthday, Children, Cuddling & Snuggling, Domestic Fluff, Ensemble Cast, Established Relationship, Everybody is Supportive, Family, Family Fluff, Firsts, Fluff and Angst, Gay Parents, He's a good guy now I promise, Holidays, Hospitals, How Do Babies Work?, Implied/Referenced Character Death, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, Implied/Referenced Rape/Non-con, Implied/Referenced Sex, Intimacy, Kid Fic, M/M, Married Ash Lynx/Okumura Eiji, Married Couple, Minor Original Character(s), Nervousness, New Family, Nice Lee Yut Lung, Only vaguely because it's Ash, Parent-Child Relationship, Parenthood, Photographer Okumura Eiji, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Self-Acceptance, Self-Esteem Issues, Slice of Life, Surrogacy, Tenderness, Trust Issues, University Professor Ash Lynx
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-01-02
Updated: 2019-02-03
Packaged: 2019-10-02 18:55:03
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 15
Words: 39,621
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17269214
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Starra/pseuds/Starra
Summary: Ash and Eiji are happily married. Both are now in their thirties and live in an apartment in New York. Ash is a university professor and Eiji is a photographer.Ash, who has slowly but steadily been overcoming his past, is completely taken by surprise when Eiji asks him if he's interested in having children. He hesitantly goes along with it. Shorter's sister Nadia agrees to be a surrogate mother for them.This is the story of Ash and Eiji as first-time parents, trying to navigate the maze that is raising a baby, and Ash learning that it is, in fact, okay to let himself be happy.





	1. You Two Deserve It

**Author's Note:**

> Since the fandom seems to unanimously agree that AshEiji would be good parents and have a cute daughter and be a happy family together I decided to write my own take on it. It was supposed to be fluff, but since it's Ash, he's... not fluffy, lol. 
> 
> More tags/characters will be added as I go, and don't worry, Yut Lung isn't going to be that antagonistic. He's stopped being (as) petty nowadays. 
> 
> Also I know absolutely nothing about pregnancy, babies or children so this is most likely extremely medically inaccurate. Oops.
> 
> PS This takes place in the anime 'verse but there are some elements of the manga there too, namely that Nadia married Charlie. Press F to pay respects for their forgotten relationship.
> 
> PPS Nothing bad will happen to Nadia or the baby, it's all in Ash's head.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Eiji raises the question of having kids. Ash thinks about it and decides it's a good idea.
> 
> The two of them ask Max to help try and find them a surrogate, and Shorter's sister Nadia agrees to be one.

Ash was now in his early thirties. He lived in an apartment in downtown New York with his husband, Eiji, and the two of them were happily enjoying their lives. After spending a few years in Japan with Eiji and his family, they'd returned to America to live, and with Eiji's support, Ash had undergone extensive therapy. It had taken him a long time, but he was finally comfortable with who he was for the most part, and he still couldn't believe someone like Eiji had stuck with him through it all. Eiji loved him, faults and all, and he made sure never to do anything that Ash wasn't okay with, and always matched Ash's pace. There was a small part of Ash that felt like any day Eiji would be taken away from him, or he'd realise that he didn't actually want to be with Ash anymore, no matter how many times Eiji reassured Ash that he was never going to abandon him.

Ash had obtained a university degree in law and politics (despite his hatred for both), and had landed a job in recent years teaching political science at a local university not too far from where he and Eiji lived. Eiji had finished his university studies in Tokyo (which was partially why they'd gone to Japan), and was now a professional photographer who specialised in cityscapes. Eiji was sometimes commissioned by Newsweek to shoot cover photos for their articles, as Max had recommended him early on in his career.

 

The two of them were cuddling in bed one night when Eiji asked Ash a question that took him by complete surprise.

"So, Ash... I've been thinking..." Eiji began, his head resting on Ash's shoulder.

 _This is it, huh,_ Ash thought. _He's going to leave me and go back to Japan after all. I knew it. He-_

"This is a... weird question," Eiji continued, "But... w-would you be interested in having kids?"

Ash had no idea how to respond. Had he heard incorrectly? He was pretty sure he hadn't. He slowly sat up and turned to face Eiji, who looked somewhat embarrassed.

"Eiji," Ash said, confused, "You _do_ understand how basic human biology works, don't you?" (Ash knew there were many cases where 'basic human biology' didn't apply, but in the case of both him and Eiji, their bodies couldn't compatibly create a child together.)

"O-Of course I do!" Eiji retorted, blushing. "I... I didn't mean it like _that_! I was just thinking... y'know... we could, uh, adopt or something..."

Ash sat there in silence. Kids? Him? He didn't exactly have the best experiences with fathers (not counting Max), so he didn't know what to think. This was the first time Eiji had ever asked something of him other than things like nagging him to do the laundry or make his side of the bed. 

"If you don't want to," Eiji said, "I won't force you. It's just an idea. I'm not going to be upset if you say no." He smiled that angelic smile of his that still made Ash feel like he was the luckiest man in the world. Ash couldn't exactly say no to _that_.

"I couldn't be a father," Ash found himself saying, trying to keep his voice steady. "I don't... I wouldn't have any idea what to do."

Eiji laughed slightly. His laugh was also angelic (to be fair, everything about Eiji was angelic). "Ash," he said, gently holding Ash's hands in his, "I wouldn't have any idea what I'm doing, either. It would be a learning experience for both of us. But like I said, you don't have to agree."

Ash managed to smile back at him. A child with Eiji... Maybe it wasn't such a bad idea after all.

"I don't know if I want to adopt," Ash said. "I've heard it's a pretty tough process, and given my criminal record, I don't even know if we _could_." Ash no longer felt guilty about the crimes he'd committed (and he'd been cleared of killing Marvin), but that didn't mean anything to the mess that was the US legal system. The mere thought of trying to deal with it gave Ash a headache.

"There are also other options," Eiji added. "We could, uh, see if we can find someone who'd be willing to be a surrogate for us..."

Eiji had clearly been thinking about this for a while. From the way he was talking, he'd done some research, too. The idea of surrogacy appealed to Ash more than adoption did, but there were issues with that as well.

"Who d'you think would do it?" Ash asked.

"Dunno..." Eiji replied. "We could ask around, I guess."

"Theoretically," Ash said slowly, "Whose sperm would we be using?"

"Yours." Eiji answered instantly. So he'd thought about that, too. 

 

His... So it'd be _Ash's_ child. Ash didn't exactly object, but the same voice that told him Eiji would leave him spoke up again: _You don't deserve to be a father_. But years of therapy had taught Ash how to deal with that voice, so he simply told it _Fuck off, bitch, yes I do_ in response, hoping it would go away. It did. 

"Sure," Ash said. "If we can find someone, let's... let's do it, Eiji." He couldn't help but smile.

Eiji's face lit up. He buried his head in Ash's chest and nuzzled against it. "Thank you, Ash..." he whispered softly. "I love you."

"I love you too, Eiji," Ash replied, gently running his hand through Eiji's hair.

 

_Me. A father. With Eiji._

 

* * *

  

A few days later, Ash met with Max for lunch at a coffee shop near the university he taught at. They met up twice a month like this, as they were both busy, but they liked bitching at each other about whatever the current political issues were -- and there were many current political issues.

Today, however, once their anti-White House session was over (not that it was ever truly over), Ash had decided to tell Max about his and Eiji's plans. Max knew a lot of people and had connections, so they both reckoned he'd have better luck at finding a surrogacy candidate than them. Ash didn't exactly want to ask his students (that would be gross) and he didn't know the other teachers well enough. 

Max listened intently as Ash explained the situation to him. He didn't say anything, just nodded and went "uh-huh" whenever Ash paused.

"By the way," Ash said, once he was done, We're _not_ using Jessica. That'd be like having a kid with my mom, that's way too creepy."

Max laughed. "She'd probably do it but yeah," he said as he finished the last of his coffee. "Anyway, I'll ask around. I'm sure there'll be someone out there willing to do it. I can ask my buddies in the police too, they might know someone."

"Thanks, Max," Ash smiled. Max stood up and gave Ash a couple of headpats.

"I should get going," he said. "And I'll let you know if I hear anything."

Ash nodded as Max left. He immediately texted Eiji to let him know that Max had agreed to help them.

 

* * *

 

It took only a week for Max to contact Ash with an offer. He'd arranged to visit Ash and Eiji at their apartment on Sunday to tell them who it was, and he hadn't seen Eiji in a while either, so it worked out.

"So, who is it?" Ash asked. They were all seated at the dining table, having finished eating the cold pasta salad that Eiji had made for lunch.

"Well..." Max began slowly. "I don't know how you'll feel about this, but..."

"Just spit it out, old man," Ash sighed. "You sounded excited before."

"Nadia Wong said she'd do it."

Nadia Wong. Shorter's older sister. She had no children of her own, and was a married woman. Hearing her name for the first time in years brought back all the memories of Shorter to Ash. He still sometimes had nightmares about killing him. Nobody blamed Ash for it anymore, but Ash still blamed himself.

He didn't know how he felt about the idea of using her as a surrogate. He was shocked she'd even offered.

"I think that'd be good," Eiji said. Ash turned to look at him.

"But, Eij--"

"I know," Eiji cut him off. "But in a way, it would be a nice tribute to Shorter, wouldn't it? It's kind of like remembering him."

Ash wasn't sure if he agreed, but what if they turned Nadia down and nobody else said yes? What if this was their one chance?

"Alright," Ash said. "If she's okay with it, we'll... see if it works."

"Great," Max said cheerfully. "I'll let Nadia know. And Charlie's cool with it too, just so you know. I made sure to ask him first."

 They thanked Max as he left.

Once he was gone, Ash found himself being hugged tightly by Eiji. Ash wasn't allowing himself to be happy yet, it was still far too early on. They didn't even know if Nadia could get pregnant.

 

* * *

 

Ash and Eiji visited Nadia some days afterwards at Chang Dai. Ash still felt awkward being there, but today it was amplified. At least being with Eiji calmed him slightly.

"Are you sure about this, Nadia?" Ash asked her. "I know Max said you were, but..."

"If I wasn't okay with it I wouldn't have agreed," Nadia replied. "It's the least I can do for you two, and I know Shorter would have encouraged me." She smiled gently at them.

"So, um," Ash muttered quietly, "We'll be... using my sperm, and--"

"Max told me that," Nadia said. "And as I understand it, we'll be doing this without the help of a fertility center?"

"Yeah." Ash was starting to realise that Max had already explained everything to her. "It'll save us money, and to be honest it feels a bit weird doing it that way. If... things don't work out naturally though, it's something we could consider."

"Sure," Nadia nodded. "I'll do everything I can on my end, too. I want to make this happen. You two deserve it."

Ash didn't understand why she was being so nice to them, but he was grateful that she was.

They told Nadia that they'd assure her safety, and that they'd help her in any way they could. She didn't need to worry about money, and if there was anything she needed, they'd supply it.

 

Ash had been doing major research into fertility, reproduction and similar fun topics. It was more complicated than he'd anticipated, which worried him, but Eiji reminded him that women got pregnant every single day all around the world, and that he was overthinking it. Eiji had also mentioned that if Ash was stressed it probably wouldn't help matters, so Ash tried his best to stay calm. But it wasn't that easy for him.

 

* * *

 

Two months and several attempts later, Ash received a call from Nadia during his lunch break to give him the good news: she was pregnant. Ash was in the staff room and had to fight to keep his composure, as he wasn't really in the mood to cry in front of his colleagues. He hadn't said anything to them about it, as he felt it was still too early to get his hopes up. There were too many voices in his head telling him something would go wrong that he was struggling to ignore.

Once he was done talking with Nadia, he texted Eiji to let him know and said he wasn't able to call him because he was at work.

Eiji quickly responded with _Wonderful!_ and a bunch of smiley-face emojis.  _He's so cute_ , Ash thought.

One of the other professors, who was sitting next to Ash, had noticed something was going on.

"What's up, Callenreese?" he asked cheerfully. "You seem happy about something."

"Uh, yeah," Ash mumbled, quickly turning off his phone screen. "My... My husband just got a promotion that he's been wanting for ages," he lied, unable to come up with anything else.

"Oh, that's great!" the man grinned. "Your husband's a photographer, right?"

"He is, yeah," Ash said. "He sometimes does stuff for Newsweek."

Ash wasn't very good at small talk, but he liked talking about Eiji. Eiji was the light of his life and he wanted people to know how great he was. He was glad none of the other staff members at the university seemed to care about same-sex relationships. And if they did, tough shit, he and Eiji still loved each other anyway.

 

When Ash got home that night, he and Eiji rang Nadia.

"I'll keep you updated," Nadia said. "Charlie's taking care of me, but if anything happens one of us will let you know."

"Thanks, Nadia," Eiji said. "Is there anything you'd like us to do?"

"Not yet," Nadia replied. "But there is one thing... Do you want to know the sex of the baby? That's something they ask you at some point, right?"

Neither of them answered. From the research Ash had done, it would still be a few weeks before Nadia had her first ultrasound. Ash looked over at Eiji, who glanced back at him. Ash, personally, _didn't_ want to know, partially because it didn't matter all that much to him, and partially because he didn't want to get attached to an unborn baby who might have something go wrong that prevented Ash from meeting it.

Eiji seemed to be able to tell what Ash was thinking, so he said "No, we'd like to keep it a surprise," nodding at Ash as he spoke into the phone.

"Understood," Nadia said. "And if I have any questions, is it okay to message you?"

"Yeah, of course," Ash said. "We're not experts though, so it's probably better to ask a doctor..."

"Absolutely," Nadia said with a soft laugh. "Anyway, I should get going. I'll send you updates when I can."

They both thanked Nadia and ended the call. 

 

Eiji pulled Ash into a gentle but firm hug.

"It's actually happening," he whispered into Ash's ear. "I'm so excited..."

Ash wanted to agree with him, but he was more scared than anything else. Something could happen to the baby. Something could happen to Nadia. Miscarriages were common things, so were stillbirths. Even with the best medical facilities available, something could-

"Ash," Eiji said, interrupting his chain of thought. "You're overthinking things again, aren't you?"

"...Yeah," Ash replied.

"It's okay," Eiji said, pulling away from Ash so that they were facing each other. "Nothing's going to happen, you'll see. We'll be meeting our child in seven months, Ash. Don't worry about anything."

"I know," Ash sighed. "I know it'll be okay, but..." He glanced down at the floor to avoid looking at Eiji.

"Look at me, Ash," Eiji told him, knowing exactly what Ash was doing. Eiji was always good at reading him. Ash looked back up at his husband. "I know you're thinking that you can't be happy or something like that again, but you can be. You have every right to be happy about this. We're going to prepare for this properly, and you're not going to dwell on 'what if's or 'but's, understand?"

Ash smirked. "Got it, Eiji," he said. "So we should think of remodelling the guest bedroom, then?"

"That's a good starting point," Eiji laughed in response.

 

It was going to be a hectic seven months.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I have a name picked out for the daughter that's extremely extra but I'm going to use it because fuck it, lol. 
> 
> Also I tried to make the scene where they were talking in bed as... un-cissexist as possible but they are two cis dudes talking about how babies are made so I'm not sure if I succeeded or not, sorry :x.


	2. Need a Ride?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> As the months tick by, Ash finds himself becoming more and more stressed, despite Eiji's attempts to calm him.
> 
> Nadia goes into labour while Ash is in the middle of a lecture, and Ash can barely keep himself together in class. 
> 
> And he hitches a ride from somebody he really doesn't want to be hitching rides from.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know I said baby this chapter, but... baby will be next chapter, oops.

Sing, who had recently graduated from university, dropped by the day Ash and Eiji told him the news, which was a few days after Nadia had had her ultrasound and had confirmed the baby was healthy. They'd asked if he could keep an eye on Nadia, since it was less suspicious if Sing hung out at Chang Dai, and Ash and Eiji could only check in on her periodically, anyway. Charlie's friends at the police force were watching her at home, but they couldn't spend all day sitting in a restaurant in Chinatown without people asking questions. Sing had more than happily agreed.

"By the way," Sing said, after a lull in their conversation, "The one thing I can't guarantee is that it'll stay a secret. People will be able to tell she's pregnant soon. I know most of them will assume it's Charlie's, and I won't say anything, but there's a certain _somebody_ who might catch wind."

Ash grimaced slightly at Sing's comment, knowing exactly who he meant. Yut Lung had, for the most part, fucked off and left him and Eiji alone, but Ash knew there was nothing holding him back from attacking them again other than the fact that he was, according to Sing, too busy to care about them currently. Apparently restoring Chinatown took most of his time and energy, and he spent his days in Hong Kong, which Ash was _very_ thankful for. Even thinking about that asshole pissed Ash off.

"He'd only know about it if you told him, right?" Ash asked. "So don't tell him. It's that easy."

"He'll notice if I'm spending more time with you guys though," Sing sighed. "He says he's not monitoring me, but I don't trust anything that comes out of his mouth."

"True," Ash laughed. "If he finds out, whatever, I'll just have to deal with his bullshit again, I guess. But if he tries anything, he'll regret it."

"Totally," Sing grinned. "I'll try not to fuck up."

 Ash wanted to trust him. Yut Lung getting in the way again was the last thing Ash needed in his current state.

 

* * *

 

The months ticked on. They'd finished painting the guest bedroom and had ordered a crib, a bassinet and other necessities online. The baby would be sleeping in their bedroom at first, but once it was old enough it would need to be moved into its own room. Ash struggled to think that far ahead (he struggled to even think as far ahead as the baby being born), so he'd left most of the planning to Eiji. Eiji kept trying to encourage Ash to allow himself to be excited, but Ash was still overtaken by fear. No matter how many times he told himself things would be okay, and even if they weren't that it wasn't the end of the world, he was having a hard time keeping calm and his stress was getting worse as time went by.

Thankfully, Ash had a lot of tests to mark and lectures to write, so at least some days he was able to distract himself. It was only when he was at home with Eiji that his mind started focusing on worst case scenarios.

 

Roughly two months before the baby was due, Eiji brought up a question that Ash hadn't thought about at all.

"What do you think we should name them?" Eiji asked out of nowhere.

They were cuddling in bed again, and Ash was checking the news on his phone. He looked over at Eiji.

"Huh?"

"You know," Eiji said, "Names. For... the baby."

  _Oh_.

 "No idea," Ash replied slowly. "I... kinda forgot about that."

"I know we don't know what sex the baby will be," Eiji explained, "But we could come up with a few ideas for both girls and boys."

"Mmhmm..."

 Giving their unborn baby a _name_ was making it a thing. And Ash didn't want to make it a thing until it was there in front of them. But Eiji clearly thought differently about these things.

"I was thinking," Eiji went on, "About... maybe keeping with the theme of your name."

"What, the whole 'dawn' thing?" Ash asked, remembering that he'd once told Eiji the meaning of his real name, Aslan.

"Exactly," Eiji replied. "What about Aurora for a girl? It means 'dawn' in Latin."

Aurora was a common enough name. It wasn't some made-up, hard-to-spell modern name that a lot of parents liked to use.

"I like it," Ash decided. "D'you have any boys' names?"

"Well..." Eiji took out his phone and showed Ash a list of names. There were roughly five names for boys and five for girls. "Some of these are unisex," he commented. "They all mean things like 'dawn' and 'light'." Ash could tell he was serious about this.

 

The male names Eiji had chosen were Anatoli, Hikaru (Eiji said this was a common Japanese name), Kouki (which could be written with the kanji for 'light' and 'brightness') and Uri (Eiji picked it because, like Ash's name, it was Hebrew).

The female names were Aurora, Hinata, Roxana, Youko and plain old Dawn (Eiji said this was a last resort).

 

"Maybe," Ash suggested, "We could have a Japanese middle name? That way people won't ask as many questions."

"We could," Eiji said. "But for middle names I was thinking of using something that means 'jade'."

"You're really going for the theme thing, huh?" Ash smiled. It was nice knowing how much Eiji cared.

"D-Do you not want me to?" Eiji asked, as if he'd suddenly thought Ash wasn't keen on the idea.

"I don't mind!" Ash insisted. "I was just teasing you!"

Eiji laughed. "Sorry," he apologised, "You haven't done that in a while..."

Ash had forgotten that he'd been too stressed to joke around with Eiji recently.

"Anyway," Eiji continued, "For middle names... If we wanted a Japanese name, there's Midori, which means 'green'. There's Hisui, which actually means 'jade', but that's a much rarer name, and I think Midori goes better with Aurora..."

"So... Aurora Midori Callenreese if it's a girl, then?" Ash asked, confirming Eiji's naming scheme.

"Yeah," Eiji replied, smiling. "If it's a boy... Midori's also a boy's name, so he could be Uri Midori Callenreese."

"Hmm. We'll see," Ash said. "Maybe they won't fit either, and we'll have to come up with something else entirely."

"There's always that," Eiji chuckled. "But there's still time. We'll see. I can't believe it's only two months away..."

Ash couldn't believe it, either. It still didn't feel real. They'd visited Nadia a few times when they could. She was still healthy, and apparently there were no issues with the baby, either. But to Ash, it was difficult to grasp that the baby inside Nadia was _his_ baby. He still couldn't get excited about it.

 

* * *

 

Ash was in the middle of a lecture one day when his phone rang. He usually kept it off, but since it was close to Nadia's due date, he'd been keeping his phone on his desk for the past couple of weeks just in case. He was giving a presentation on some boring aspect of the political party system, and it took him a moment to register why his phone was ringing in class.

 

Then it hit him like a sack of bricks.

 

"S-Sorry," he apologised to his hall of very confused students. "It's, uh, important, so I..."

Ash quickly picked up and answered the phone as he dashed outside into the hallway.

"Nadia?" he asked, trying to keep himself calm.

"Hey, it's Charlie," the gruff voice on the other end of the line said. "Nadia's gone into labour, so we're at the hospital."

Labour? That meant the baby would be here soon.

"Is... Is she okay?" Ash's voice shook more with each word.

"She's fine," Charlie said. "It looks like it'll still be a while, but we wanted to get here early just to be safe. Are you able to make it over here?"

"I'm... in class," Ash breathed. "But once I'm done I'll head over. Let Eiji know, he's got a better chance of getting there before I can."

"Sure thing," Charlie replied.

He gave Ash the name of the hospital they were at (which had been pre-arranged, but Ash had admittedly forgotten it in all his stress) and hung up.

Ash didn't want to go back to his lecture. He would much rather call a cab and go straight to the hospital. But he couldn't risk his job, and it was the last class for the day. So he reluctantly put his phone in his pocket and headed back inside. 

"Professor Callenreese, is everything okay?" one of the students asked.

"Uh, yeah, it's all good," Ash said, returning to his desk. "Now, er, where were we?" He looked up at the PowerPoint presentation that was projected on the wall. None of it made any sense to him, despite him having written it. His mind was elsewhere.

 

Nadia. Hospital. Baby.

 

"Professor?" asked another student.

"I-I'm fine," Ash said. He wasn't fine, but he had to get through this lecture. He took a few deep breaths, which helped somewhat. "Right. So. Politics. Party system."

He somehow managed to bullshit his way through the rest of the presentation, although he had no idea if the students could understand it.

As soon as he'd finished reading the last slide, he hastily explained to the students that he needed to be somewhere urgently, and that he'd post the lecture on the university's website. It didn't take him long to pack up, and he practically sprinted to the front entrance of the university.

Then Ash remembered something: he didn't drive (he got too frustrated driving in New York traffic), and Eiji would already be at the hospital. Which meant Ash would have to call a taxi. Which meant waiting around for a taxi.

 

While he was pulling out his phone, a voice spoke up from behind him that he hadn't heard in years.

 "Need a ride?"

Ash spun around, almost dropping his phone in the process.

It was the person he least wanted to see at this point in time. 

"The fuck do you want?" Ash spat. He didn't have time for this.

"I asked you," Yut Lung said slowly, "If you needed a ride."

"Why... are you here?" Ash asked.

"I saw Nadia Wong being escorted to hospital by her husband," Yut Lung explained. That didn't answer why he knew that _Ash_ was involved. "I've heard you and Eiji have been visiting her while she's been pregnant," the Chinese man continued.

"Did Sing tell you?" Ash blurted out.

"No, but he _was_ the one I asked when I had my suspicions," Yut Lung said. "Anyway, this is hardly the time to be standing around talking. I'm offering you a ride to the hospital. Will you take it?"

Fuck. Ash really didn't want to be indebted to Yut Lung of all people, but he had no choice.

"Fine," Ash hissed reluctantly. "Where the fuck's the car?"

"This way." 

Yut Lung, of course, wasn't driving. His rich ass still had a chauffeur taking him everywhere. Not that Ash was any better, but Ash had an excuse.

Ash carefully got in the back seat, making sure he sat directly behind Yut Lung so that it would be harder for his enemy to attack him if he chose to do so. But it didn't look like Yut Lung was going to, at least not today.

 

They said nothing to each other for the whole ride. Ash was preoccupied, and he had nothing to say to Yut Lung anyway. He texted Eiji to let him know he was on his way, and purposefully left out that he'd hitched a ride with the guy who'd tried to kill both him and his husband on several separate occasions. 

The feeling of dread in Ash's stomach grew more intense the closer they got to the hospital. 

As soon as the car stopped in the parking lot, Ash went to jump out.

"Wait," Yut Lung called. Ash, perhaps against his better judgement, stopped.

"What?"

"Good luck."

Ash had no idea why Yut Lung was saying that to _him_. Ash wasn't the one giving birth. He mumbled an extremely half-assed 'thanks' as he got out of the car.

 

He now had to face another challenge: the hospital itself. Sure, this wasn't a super shady mental health hospital, but it was still a _hospital_. Luckily, Eiji was there to greet him once he shakily stumbled into the lobby. They exchanged greetings and updates (nothing much had happened since Charlie had called Ash), and Eiji said they could go to the room Nadia was in.

"Ash?"

"Yeah?"

Ash hadn't realised that Eiji had started walking away from him, even though he'd been watching his husband.

"It's okay," Eiji said, taking Ash's hand (the one that wasn't clutching his briefcase). "Let's go."

Ash tried to zone out as they made their way down the hospital corridors. He seemingly succeeded, as Eiji had to prompt him when they arrived at their destination. 

Nadia would be fine. The baby would be fine.

 

The baby.

Their baby.

That was almost here.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Aurora Midori Callenreese is a kickass name and you can't convince me otherwise.
> 
> PS See? Yut Lung isn't an asshole anymore!


	3. Did You Notice?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ash and Eiji are at the hospital waiting for their baby to arrive. Once they finally meet their daughter, Ash has no idea how to react.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ash hates hospitals I'm sorry.
> 
> Usual disclaimer that this is probably not medically accurate, oops.

It took every fibre of Ash's being for him to not bolt from the room the moment he stepped into it. Nadia was lying in bed, clearly already exhausted with a pained expression on her face. It vaguely reminded Ash of Shorter being in pain, which he didn't really want to think about. Instead, he tried to focus on the briefing that Charlie was giving him, but his words weren't registering in Ash's brain.

Eiji gently prodded Ash with his elbow.

"Yeah?" Maybe if Eiji told him his brain would work.

"It'll probably be several hours before the baby arrives," Eiji explained slowly. "Charlie's said they'll give Nadia an epidural soon, but it's too early for that yet."

Ash nodded in response, unable to say anything.

 

He _really_ didn't like being here. The bright lights and the whirring of machines brought back memories that still haunted him. He'd half wanted Nadia to give birth at home, but he knew that was selfish, and she and the baby would be much safer in the care of hospital staff. The problem was, Ash's instinct was to not trust hospital staff at all.

Eiji guided Ash over to the chairs that were by Nadia's bed and sat him down, taking Ash's briefcase from him and placing it on the floor. He couldn't bring himself to look at Nadia, and he was suddenly hit with a weird feeling of guilt. She was in pain. Pain that had been caused directly by _him_. He wanted to apologise to her, but that would probably be weird. Nadia had agreed to this. He knew that, but that still didn't quell his emotions.

The midwife and nurse that were in the room were another factor that was making Ash tense. They kept walking back and forth to check on Nadia and the equipment. He considered asking them for something to calm his nerves, but part of his brain said _They won't give you what you want, don't risk it_. He decided not to risk it.

Ash knew they were just doing their jobs, but whenever they walked past him, his whole body froze. He had no idea if they could tell what he was feeling.

Eiji, at least, had noticed that Ash was uncomfortable, as Ash realised they were holding hands (Ash wasn't sure how long they'd been doing so). He rested his head on Eiji's shoulder, despite not being able to relax at all. 

 

At one point, Charlie offered to fetch them drinks, and Ash vaguely said something about water. The hospital room was dry and hot, which didn't go well with Ash's overwhelming anxiety. He barely noticed Charlie handing him a bottle of water. Drinking it marginally helped him. 

Some time later, either Eiji or Charlie mentioned that Nadia's epidural was now in, and that the labour was progressing smoothly. Eiji told Ash that he'd been falling in and out of sleep over the past few hours, which Ash hadn't realised at all. He also didn't know how long they'd been there, the analogue clock on the wall suddenly a foreign language to him. 

 

Suddenly, Ash was shaken awake by Eiji (when had he drifted off to sleep again?).

"Ash! Ash!" Eiji said excitedly in a hushed voice.

"W-What?" Had something gone wrong while he wasn't paying attention?

"The baby's on its way!" Eiji was holding onto Ash's upper arms.

"Duh, Eiji, that's why we're here?" Ash didn't know what the hell he was on about.

"No, Ash..." Eiji shook his head slowly, smiling that gentle smile of his. "Nadia's... Nadia's about to give birth."

Ash's mind went blank. He hadn't been focusing on anything for a while, but what Eiji said made him almost completely shut down. He didn't know what to say other than "O-Oh". Ash forced himself to look over at Nadia, and when he did so, he was made fully aware of the loud, unsettling noises she was making. He quickly turned away again.

The midwife was giving instructions to Nadia that Ash couldn't quite catch, and Eiji was now clutching Ash's hands very tightly. He could feel Eiji shaking slightly against him, and he wondered if he was shaking too.

 

The next thing he knew, high-pitched crying filled the room. The crying of a baby. His baby. _Their_ baby.

He barely registered the midwife standing in front of them. She was holding a small bundle in her arms that had been hastily wrapped in cloth.

"Congratulations, Mr. & Mr. Callenreese," the midwife said with a smile. "This is your daughter."

 

Daughter.

So the baby was a girl.

 

The midwife extended her arms out towards Ash, who gingerly took the baby into his own. She blinked blankly up at him, and Ash felt a surge of a multitude of emotions. He had no idea how to react. Should he be happy? Should he cry? He was too exhausted to think.

All he knew was that he wanted to protect the tiny human being he was cradling and never let go of her. It was kind of like how he felt about Eiji, only slightly different.

Unable to think, react or say anything, he handed the baby over to Eiji, who wiped tears from his eyes before taking her.

The sight of them together caused a lump to form in Ash's throat. It was, perhaps, the most beautiful thing he'd seen: Eiji, an angel, holding another, very tiny angel, smiling more gently than Ash had ever seen him. He wanted to capture that moment forever.

Eiji gently touched the baby's cheek with his index finger. "Hello, little one," he whispered, his voice unstable. "It's nice to meet you. I'm... your father, Eiji." How was he able to talk to her like that? Ash hadn't even been able to get a single word -- or sound, for that matter -- out.

Eiji then turned the baby so that she was facing Ash. "And this is your father, Aslan," he added, his expression as soft as his voice. Ash tried to respond, but his mouth wasn't working.

"Would you like to bathe her?" the midwife asked, directing the question at both of them.

"You can do it, Ash," Eiji said as he started to cry again. "I'm... I won't be able to do a good job like this," he added with a chuckle.

Ash nodded, once again taking the baby -- their daughter -- from Eiji.

 

Walking over to the small tub, Ash was petrified that he was going to drop her at any moment. That she'd slip from his arms, and he'd be responsible for hurting her. Somehow, however, he managed to hold on to her the whole way.

The midwife began filling the tub with water, Ash not knowing if she was giving him instructions or not.

"Mr. Callenreese, the bath's ready," the midwife said. Ash, whose mouth was still out of commission, nodded again. "I'll help you take the blanket off her." Ash held his daughter tightly as the midwife took off the blanket.

He made himself listen to what he was being told. The midwife explained the correct way to hold his daughter in the water and how to gently dab her clean with a soft cloth. Ash was still shaking, but he felt himself becoming calm the more he washed her.

Once he was done, the midwife dried his daughter off with a towel and wrapped her in a fresh blanket.

"Now," she said, "From here on out what will happen is that we'll be keeping baby and mother here for another night just to monitor them. The baby is perfectly healthy, and Nadia is doing well, but for safety reasons we want to keep an eye on them."

Ash paused.

 

_What was that?_

 

"She -- She won't be coming home with us?" he asked, his voice cracking. He wasn't about to leave his daughter in a _hospital_ of all places.

"Not tonight," the midwife said, "But tomo--"

"No."

"I'm sorry?" The midwife was taken aback.

" _No_." Ash said again. "I'm not--" He was cut off by Eiji, who had appeared at his side.

"We understand," Eiji said quickly. He then turned to Ash and added, in a quiet voice, "Ash, I know, but they're not going to hurt her. They want to keep her here so that she _won't_ get hurt, okay? They're trying to help us, and they're trying to help our daughter."

Ash paused again. What Eiji was saying made logical sense, but the thought of leaving a tiny, defenceless baby alone with doctors and nurses who could do god-knows-what to her made him feel sick. Ash wanted to protect her, and he couldn't do that unless she was home with him and Eiji.

"You... You really won't hurt her?" Ash asked, feeling like he was going to cry any moment.

"N-No," the midwife said in a slightly offended voice. "We would _never_ hurt anyone, especially not a baby!" Ash was partially glad he was too tired to make a retort about the 'never hurt anyone' remark and how false it was.

"Sorry," Eiji apologised. "He... doesn't have good experiences with hospitals, so..."

The midwife nodded. "Oh, I see. I'm sorry, Mr. Callenreese," she said, turning to Ash. "I know you want to take your daughter home with you tonight, but I'm afraid I can't let you. I promise you, she'll be here tomorrow, and we won't have harmed her in any way whatsoever."

"...Alright." Ash decided it was better to agree than waste his energy trying to argue. He needed to get home and rest himself, and Eiji looked tired, too.

"Make sure you both rest, you two," Nadia called from her bed. "I'll make sure nothing happens, okay?"

"Thanks, Nadia," Ash said.

"Oh, right, one more thing!" said the midwife. Ash and Eiji, who had collected their belongings and were almost at the door, stopped.

"Yes?" Eiji asked.

"Have you decided on a name for your daughter?"

They had. But Ash couldn't remember it. What was it, again?

"Aurora," Eiji answered. "Aurora Midori Callenreese."

"What a lovely name."

 

* * *

 

Ash didn't remember the ride home. It was not too long after sunrise, so there wasn't much traffic, and the journey was shorter than it sometimes was for them. He didn't realise they were back at their apartment until he heard the sound of Eiji's keys jangling. 

Once they were inside and the door was shut behind them, Ash let himself fall into Eiji's embrace. The emotions he'd been holding back spilled over, and he sobbed into Eiji's warm, comforting chest. He wanted to stay like that forever, but both of them were exhausted, and after Ash's crying had subsided, they made their way to bed.

"We'll shower when we wake up," Eiji said as he undressed. "I know we're both too tired..."

"...Yeah," Ash mumbled sleepily, changing into a tshirt that wasn't covered in sweat and tears. 

They said goodnight to each other after Eiji turned out the lights.

"Did you notice, Ash?" Eiji asked in a whisper, holding Ash close to him.

"Notice what?" Ash hadn't noticed much that evening.

"She has your eyes. They're green, just like yours."

"Are they?" Ash hadn't realised at all. She'd been looking directly at him, yet the colour of his daughter's eyes hadn't registered at all.

"Yeah," Eiji said. "They're beautiful."

Ash pulled Eiji closer in response.

"I can't wait to have her home," Eiji added.

"Me neither," Ash said.

 

He was finally excited. Their daughter had been born, and she'd be home with them this time tomorrow. Maybe the universe was, finally, allowing Ash to be happy. Maybe this wouldn't be taken away from him, after all.

 

For the first time in forever, Ash didn't have any nightmares that night.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I don't know if genetics work this way but fuck it, Aurora has Ash's green eyes because this is fanfiction and I can do what I want.


	4. I Wish it Was Tomorrow Already

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ash and Eiji go to collect their daughter from the hospital after Ash sleeps all day and misses visiting hours. (He just needed some well-deserved rest.)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I realised that I completely forgot to say anything about the umbilical cord last chapter so uh. Ash was kinda freaking out and Eiji didn't want to leave his side so Eiji asked Charlie to do it. Ash just didn't notice.
> 
> This chapter contains a couple of brief mentions of Ash's past in relation to CSA. It's very minor, but just in case...
> 
> Also the second half was written after midnight so it might not make a lot of sense. Sorry.

When Ash woke up, the sun was setting outside. Eiji wasn't in bed with him, and it took Ash a few moments to remember why he'd been sleeping all day. Glancing at the alarm clock that was on their nightstand, he saw it was just before six in the evening.

Eiji was in the living room, sitting on the sofa and looking at his phone. Ash wasn't noticed by him until the younger man was half way across the room.

"Oh," Eiji said, smiling at Ash. "Good morning."

Ash grumbled something unintelligible as he sat down next to his husband, who hugged him instantly. "Why didn't you wake me?" he asked.

"I tried," Eiji commented nonchalantly. "You were determined to sleep. I'm sure you were just exhausted."

Ash ignored him. "Have you heard anything from Nadia?" he decided to ask instead, resting his head against Eiji's shoulder.

"I have," Eiji replied. "She's fine, and so's Aurora. They'll be letting them both go home first thing tomorrow. Oh, and she sent me a photo a few hours ago."

Eiji showed Ash his phone, on which there was a photo of Nadia holding a sleeping Aurora. He realised she had a few very fine strands of dark hair.

A wave of relief washed over Ash upon seeing their daughter again. He was glad that the hospital staff hadn't done anything to her, and that he'd be seeing her shortly.

"Can we go visit?" Ash asked. Eiji paused.

"Visiting hours will be over by the time we get there," Eiji explained, looking slightly disappointed. "We'll be able to go first thing tomorrow, but..." Ash tried to stop himself from feeling let down. It was his own fault for sleeping so long, after all.

"You didn't go without me?" Ash had thought that maybe Eiji would've visited while Ash had been asleep.

Eiji shook his head. "I wouldn't do that," he said. "She's _our_ daughter, Ash. Besides, we both need to shower before we go _anywhere_ ," he added with a slight laugh.

"...Why haven't _you_ showered?" Ash asked, unable to come up with a logical explanation for that.

Eiji laughed again. "Because I wasn't sure if you'd want me to shower with you when you woke up," he replied.

 

 They frequently showered together. Partially because it saved them water, and partially because Ash hated showers. They were a time when he was alone with his own thoughts, and his own thoughts were _never_ good ones. If he showered alone, he'd sometimes spend hours inside his own head, not knowing how much time passed or that the water was icy cold until Eiji came looking for him. 

It was also somewhere they could be intimate together.

 

Ash and Eiji's relationship had never been one that was overly sexual. Ash, until very recently, had been too traumatised by his past to be comfortable with trying anything. He wasn't scared of Eiji hurting him -- Eiji would never hurt him -- but he was scared that _he'd_ hurt Eiji. It wasn't until well into their lives together that they'd even had sex, but it wasn't something that Ash wanted to think about too much, and Eiji had explicitly told him (several times) that he didn't mind one bit and that sex was something he'd done without for his entire life, so he was more than happy with waiting until Ash was ready.

Even if they didn't have much sex, they were still two human beings that enjoyed each other's physical touch. It usually never went much beyond mutually jerking each other off or the occasional blowjob, but they were both satisfied with that.

 

"I... I think we should shower together tonight," Ash said, deciding that he really didn't want to be delving into his brain too much.

"I agree," Eiji smiled. "But we should eat first. You haven't eaten since you were at work yesterday, yeah?"

"...Yeah, let's do it that way."

 Things had been so chaotic that Ash had completely forgotten that he hadn't eaten in over twenty-four hours. That probably wasn't helping his mood much, on top of everything else.

They made their way into the kitchen as Eiji told him that he'd made nikujaga (a Japanese dish that consisted of meat and potatoes) earlier. Ash sat in his usual spot at their small dining table while Eiji heated their dinner up in the microwave.

"By the way," Eiji said as he sat opposite Ash after laying the table, "Your boss called earlier."

Ash, whose chopsticks were guiding a slice of potato to his mouth, froze. Of all the things he'd forgotten about, one of them was _calling his fucking boss_. He'd told her what was going on, and she'd agreed to let him take time off work, but he hadn't exactly told her _when_ that leave would commence. He should've been teaching today, now that he thought about it.

"What... What did she say?" Ash asked nervously, setting his chopsticks down. Had he been fired for being irresponsible? Probably.

"I explained things to her," Eiji said, "And she said it was all okay and that you can take as much time off as you need to."

"Thank fuck for that." So he hadn't lost his job.

"Also," Eiji continued, "She said to say congratulations."

"Oh..."

 

Silence fell as they ate. Ash was starting to really regret having spent the whole day asleep, even though he knew he'd needed it.

Ash remembered something else he'd been meaning to ask. "Have you told anyone yet?"

"I've told Max and Sing. And my family," Eiji answered. "But nobody else. I think we should wait until tomorrow."

"Yeah, probably," Ash said.

He was glad Eiji was there to help him in when his anxiety overtook him like this. Eiji, somehow, remained calm (at least on the outside) and had no problems with taking care of anything that Ash wasn't able to take care of himself. Most of the time, Ash was okay, but the past nine months had had him constantly distracted. If Eiji hadn't been as supportive and loving as he was, well... Ash tried not to think about that.

"Are you... going to tell your father?" Eiji shot Ash a guilty look as he asked him.

Ash frowned. The last time he'd talked to his dad was to tell him that he and Eiji were getting married, and his response had been 'Don't fuck it up, kid'. None of Ash's biological family had been at their wedding (Eiji's family, of course, all came over from Japan to attend). Not that Ash cared.

"No." That asshole didn't need to be acknowledged again.

"I didn't think so," Eiji sighed, "But I just wanted to check. Sorry for bringing it up."

"It's okay," Ash mumbled, returning to his food. "I just... don't really want to deal with him."

 

After they'd finished eating and had washed up, they headed over to the bathroom together. They undressed and Eiji turned on the shower. Ash wasn't sure if he wanted to do anything other than actually shower tonight, and he wondered if someone like Eiji still felt sexual desire despite the enormous amount of stress he must have been feeling.

Eiji seemed to have worked out what Ash was thinking, and as they stepped under the warm-but-not-too-hot water, he said "I think we'll get clean and then head to bed."

Ash nodded as Eiji reached for the soap and a cloth. "I'll wash you," he said. "You're still tired, right?"

"Thanks, Eiji." Ash felt himself relax slightly as Eiji started cleaning him.

This was usually how it went, whether other activities were involved or not. Ash loved it when Eiji gently washed him, and he didn't care if it was potentially weird. It helped calm him down, the way Eiji softly glided the cloth over his skin. Sometimes, Eiji would hum to himself quietly, and Ash would be completely smitten with him all over again. It made him wonder if this is what Eiji would be like with their daughter: kind, gentle, loving. From the way Eiji had talked to her in the hospital, Ash figured he'd be the world's greatest parent. Ash still stood by his opinion that all parents were garbage, but Eiji was the sole exception to that, as of today. Perhaps he, too, could also be considered a good parent one day, but he didn't think he had the right to do that quite yet.

Once they were both clean and out of the shower, they dried themselves off and got ready for bed, before they went to their bedroom, changed into their pyjamas and crawled into bed, holding each other in a gentle embrace.

"She'll be here soon," Eiji whispered as he set the alarm. "We'll be seeing her in less than twelve hours..."

Ash held him tighter. "I wish it was tomorrow already."

Eiji giggled. "So do I..."

They fell asleep soon after exchanging 'good night's and 'I love you's.

 

* * *

 

Ash, who to this day was a heavy sleeper and needed Eiji to wake him up in the morning, awoke with surprising ease when he felt Eiji get out of bed and switch off the alarm.

"What time is it?" Ash grumbled, sitting up and rubbing his eyes.

"Nine o'clock," Eiji informed him. "We shouldn't spend too long getting up, otherwise it'll take ages to drive through the city."

Ash's eyes shot open and he bolted upright, which caused Eiji to turn to look at him. "Ash?"

"We-We're getting Aurora today," Ash said breathlessly, climbing out of bed and walking over to the closet. He opened it and started sifting through his section of clothes. He wanted to wear something fancy, but nothing too over the top. He knew Aurora wouldn't give a shit about what he was wearing, but he still wanted to make a good impression.

"Ash," Eiji said, gently placing a hand on Ash's shoulder. "Calm down. There's no need to get so worked up."

"Yes there is!" Ash protested, wriggling away from Eiji and picking out a light grey button-up shirt. "C'mon, Eiji, we don't have time to waste."

Eiji laughed. "Alright, I get it," he said, and Ash heard him rummaging through his side of the closet. 

They eventually chose their outfits and got dressed. Eiji made a comment about breakfast, but Ash wasn't hungry. His stomach was full of knots and he just wanted to hurry the fuck up and be at the hospital. And then leave the hospital as soon as possible.

They didn't take too long to freshen up and finish preparing for the morning, and as Ash had his hand on the doorknob he heard Eiji gasp from behind him.

"We almost forgot the car seat!" he exclaimed, running off to find the aforementioned object. "And I'll get her some clothes!"

Eiji had insisted they buy baby clothes in advance, since many things were unisex nowadays, and Ash was pleased he'd agreed to it. With the wonderful world of online shopping, they'd been able to secure everything they could think of, although they did have to be a little bit careful with money.

 

After sorting out some rather infuriating legal work some years ago, Ash had donated most of his inheritance to charities that helped children who, like him, had suffered from cases of child sexual abuse, at the recommendation of his therapist. It was fitting, Ash thought, as a final, giant 'fuck you' to Golzine. He didn't want to spend the money on himself, as he hadn't earned a single cent of it, but he had invested some in the bank just in case they needed it in the future, and he could play the stock market well, so they'd saved up a bit from that, on top of their regular jobs. University had cost them a lot (Ash had a lot of opinions about student loans that Eiji never heard the end of), but Ash had managed to pay his fees with some of Golzine's money. It was a much more minor 'fuck you', but he _was_ getting the education he wanted, and he knew that Golzine would never have approved of him attending university.

 

They didn't really talk on the way to the hospital (with the car seat safely positioned in the back next to a bag of clothes and diapers). Traffic wasn't as bad as Eiji had thought it might be, and they managed to arrive without anything eventful happening other than one dickhead cutting them off at a stop sign (but that was typical for New York).

Ash was, for once, not completely terrified of the idea of setting foot in a hospital. Perhaps it was because he'd been here before. Perhaps it was because he was going simply to 'rescue' his daughter. He vowed to himself that he'd never let her out of his sight after she was safely in his arms again.

Nadia looked much happier than she had even in the photo she'd sent Eiji, and she said the staff had been taking good care of her (and of Aurora).

"Here you go," Nadia said as she handed Aurora to Ash. "I know you'll both do an excellent job raising her. It's been a pleasure helping you boys, and I'll keep supporting you no matter what."

Ash felt himself tearing up (at both Nadia's words and at being able to hold Aurora again). "Thank you for everything, Nadia," he said. "We'll bring her to visit you as much as we can."

"Wonderful," Nadia smiled. "I'll be sure to give her discounts at Chang Dai when she's old enough."

Ash and Eiji both laughed at her.

"Oh, right!" Eiji piped up. "Um. Weren't we going to dress her?" Ash nodded as Eiji turned to the midwife. "Is that okay?"

"Of course," the midwife said. "And..." She looked over at Ash. "I'm sorry for startling you yesterday, Mr. Callenreese. I understand your daughter's precious to you."

Ash blinked, trying to recall what he'd said to the midwife, eventually remembering he'd almost refused to let Aurora stay at the hospital.

"Uh, it's okay," he muttered. "My bad." 

Eiji took Aurora from Ash and placed her on the changing table. He then paused.

"Um..." he began quietly. "How... do you put a diaper on?" Everyone else in the room but Ash chuckled.

"Don't laugh!" Ash hissed. "He's trying his best!"

"A-Ash!" Eiji said, getting flustered and blushing. "It's fine!"

Ash frowned. "Whatever." People mocking Eiji, even in a light-hearted way, upset him -- probably more than it should've.

 

The midwife showed (a very embarrassed) Eiji how to change and clean Aurora. Ash watched from the sidelines, only half paying attention, knowing that they'd be sharing that responsibility. 

"You can dress her, Ash," Eiji suggested, smiling at him. Ash would have much rather watched Eiji tend to Aurora, but he gave in.

"Okay, okay." He took the footie pyjamas out of the bag they'd brought and followed the midwife's instructions ( _I know how to put clothes on_ , Ash thought to himself).

"She's so _cute_!" Eiji cooed once Aurora's pyjamas were on properly. Ash had to agree: she looked somewhat adorable lying there with her tiny hands and tiny feet. And tiny everything. She was tiny.

Maybe in disagreement with Eiji's comment, Aurora started crying. Ash froze, wondering what they'd done to upset her.

"She'll just be hungry," the midwife informed them.

Eiji offered to feed Aurora, who was going to be using formula, as Nadia had apparently struggled producing enough breast milk to satisfy her even in just the short amount of time they'd been in hospital.

Once Aurora was fed, the midwife reminded them that they needed to fill out her birth certificate. They did so and were given the all-clear to leave.

 

_DATE OF BIRTH: May 8, 20xx_

_NAME: Aurora Midori Callenreese_

_SEX: Female_

_MOTHER'S MAIDEN NAME: Nadia Wong_

_FATHER'S NAME: Aslan Jade Callenreese (biological) & Eiji Callenreese_

They'd also been informed that Aurora was born at 5:21AM, weighing 5.3 lbs (2.3 kgs, Ash converted it for Eiji, who still sometimes struggled with US measurements).

 

They said goodbye to Nadia and Charlie (and thanked them both profusely) and headed on their way.

 

* * *

 

Ash sat in the back of the car next to Aurora on their trip home. He couldn't stop staring at her, even when she was sleeping. She was the most precious thing in the world. Except maybe Eiji. They were _both_ the most precious thing in the world to Ash. He could have two of those, fuck it, he didn't care.

She was something he'd created. She was _theirs_. Everything was going to be okay.

When they arrived home, Ash immediately took Aurora out of her car seat (which woke her up) and held her. He didn't hold her _too_ tightly, because he was scared he might hurt her, but he wrapped his arms firmly around her and held her against his chest.

"You're okay now," he whispered to her. "You're safe. Nobody's going to hurt you. Ever. You won't have to worry about anything. I'm here. Eiji's here. We'll do anything for you. I love you. We love you."

Eiji made a weird noise that prompted Ash to look over at him. He wasn't sure why, but Eiji was crying, covering his face behind a hand.

"E-Eiji?" Ash asked, worried that he'd done something.

Eiji, who had been setting down their belongings, came over and hugged Ash from behind, wrapping his hands around Ash's waist and burying his head against Ash's back.

"I'm j-just," he said through a sob, "So... So happy... We're a family, Ash..."

"...Yeah," Ash said, his gaze resting on their daughter again, who had fallen back asleep. "It's weird. It doesn't feel real."

"But it _is_ real, Ash," Eiji reminded him. "This is too amazing to be a dream."

Ash didn't exactly disagree with him.

Aurora was now home with them. They would be able to shower her with nothing but love, happiness and affection. They'd teach her how to be kind and care for others, and show her a world without hate. It was Ash's biggest wish that she would never have to know any of the horrors he'd known, and that he'd protect her from all harm, no matter what.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I don't know what a baby is. How do they work?


	5. Babies Don't Even Take Showers

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It's baby shower time! Ash forgot how dumb his gang members are.
> 
> Also, photographer Eiji shows off his skills.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm doing stuff for Banana Fish Angst Week so I might not update this as much until that's over, lol. But I wanted to write some fluff after only two days of angst. Oops.
> 
> Disclaimer: I can't math and this chapter contains some numbers. Please don't bully me, I tried lmao.

Ash was woken up that night by Aurora's cries. He jumped out of bed and ran over to her basinet, picked her up and cradled her, but she didn't settle.

"A-Are you okay?" Ash whispered, his mind starting to panic. Was she uncomfortable? Had she somehow gotten hurt? Did he need to make a trip to the ER? Her crying persisted, despite Ash's hushes. "What's wrong, Honey?"

"...Ash?" Eiji mumbled sleepily from behind him. He hadn't heard him wake up or get out of bed.

"S-She won't stop crying, Eiji," Ash explained, his voice shaking. He was on the verge of tears himself.

"She'll just be hungry," Eiji yawned, turning on a light.

Oh. Right. They'd been told she'd wake up frequently in the night for feeding. He'd forgotten about that.

"I'll go get her a bottle," Eiji said as he shuffled out of the room.

Ash sat down on the edge of the bed, still holding Aurora. "It's okay," he said, able to control his voice now that he knew what was happening. "Eiji's gonna... get you your food." She didn't understand what he was saying, but he still felt the need to talk to her as if she did.

Eiji returned some minutes later with a bottle of warm milk for her. Ash sat her up and as soon as she started drinking it she calmed down. He let out a sigh of relief once Aurora's crying stopped.

"You don't need to fret every time she cries, Ash," Eiji said, sitting on the bed next to him, watching Aurora drink. "It'll mostly be because she's hungry."

"I know," Ash replied. "I just... panicked."

Eiji rested his head on Ash's shoulder. "It's okay," he said. He was smiling at Aurora, who was enjoying her bottle. "We're going to have to get used to this, though."

"Yeah," Ash said. "How about whoever wakes up first takes care of her?" he suggested.

Eiji chuckled. "Let's do it that way."

Aurora had stopped sucking on the bottle's teat, so Ash gently took it out of her mouth. She gazed up at him. Ash tried to smile back, but he wasn't sure if he succeeded or not.

Eiji sat up and took the unfinished bottle from Ash. "I'll put this in the fridge," he said. "She should go back to sleep soon, but remember to burp her first."

"Got it."

It wasn't long until Aurora was once again asleep peacefully. Ash wondered if she was dreaming about anything. Did newborn babies even _have_ dreams? If they did, he hoped the dreams she was having were good ones.

After placing her back in her bassinet, he got into bed and snuggled up next to Eiji like he normally did.

 

* * *

 

The next day, while the three of them were sitting on the sofa and Ash and Eiji were both trying to entertain Aurora, Eiji suggested something.

"Is it okay if I take a photo of us?" Eiji asked.

Ash, who was playing with Aurora's (cute and really tiny) hands, looked over at him. "A photo?"

"Yeah," Eiji said. "We were too tired to do it yesterday, but... I want to commemorate her coming home. I'd only be sending it to family and close friends."

"Sure," Ash replied.

He'd never liked having his photo taken, even if it was Eiji who was behind the camera. It was another aspect of his past that he still wasn't entirely over, but he knew Eiji wouldn't be doing anything perverted with his photos. Or, at least, he _hoped_ he wouldn't be. A family photo was at least a completely innocent context no matter how you tried to look at it, though, so he wasn't that put off by the idea. And Eiji was right, it would be nice to commemorate the start of their new lives.

Eiji smiled at Ash. "Great," he said. "I'll go set up the camera and tripod. It shouldn't be too hard to move it in here..."

Once Eiji was out of earshot, Ash looked down at their daughter again. "Your dad's a really cool photographer," he said. "That means he takes pictures. Sometimes of people, but mostly of buildings and skylines." Aurora blinked. "He takes lots of photos of me," Ash continued. "And I'm sure he'll take lots of photos of you too! Since you're much cuter than I am..."

 

One of the things Ash and Eiji had actually discussed was what they'd have Aurora call them. Ash had instantly vetoed any variation of 'Papa' for obvious reasons, and Eiji said he'd feel weird using a Japanese term (although he was planning on trying to teach Aurora Japanese when she was old enough -- in the hopes she'd actually learn it; unlike Ash, whose Japanese was still atrocious despite having lived there for a few years), so they'd decided to just both be 'Dad' for now. Eiji asked why Ash didn't want to use 'Daddy', and Ash had to, unfortunately, explain the current connotations behind it, and once being made aware of why Ash didn't like it, Eiji had agreed that it was probably not the best idea.

 

Aurora was starting to fall asleep as Eiji fiddled around with his camera setup. Ash didn't know shit about cameras, except that Eiji had several different ones that apparently took different types of pictures or something. Eiji had tried to give Ash a brief overview of lenses, but Ash got lost after about the second sentence, so Eiji had given up on that. 

Eventually, Eiji announced that he was ready to take the photo. Aurora sort of woke up as Ash sat her up a bit and turned her to face the camera, which was nested on top of the tripod. Eiji pressed whichever button it was that he needed to press and sat down next to Ash. He quickly adjusted Aurora so that she was between them.

The camera went off before they'd gotten Aurora into a good pose, so she was looking up at Eiji instead of forwards (which was, in fairness, a hard thing to get a tiny baby to do).

Eiji showed Ash the photo once it had developed.

"Look at this," he beamed. "You're actually smiling in a photo for once!"

"Huh... Guess I am."

Ash, normally, couldn't force himself to smile, especially not in front of a camera. The only other photos of him that he was smiling in were ones that were taken at their wedding (they'd hired Ibe to be their photographer, and he'd more than happily agreed to it).

They agreed to get the photo professionally printed, framed and hung up on their wall, but Eiji suggested keeping this copy in a small frame on their nightstand. Ash thought it was a good idea. Eiji usually had good ideas.

 

* * *

 

 When Aurora was two weeks old, they invited a few people over for a baby shower (things had been too chaotic to do it before she'd been born, and Ash didn't want to prematurely celebrate anyway). Max and his family had visited them earlier, once they'd settled into somewhat of a routine (Aurora had started crying when Max tried to pick her up, which Ash found _hilarious_ ), and Sing had popped in a couple of times. Nadia and Charlie had, of course, visited as well, as both Ash and Eiji thought it was best if Aurora was as close to her biological mother as possible. Ash had asked Charlie if he was okay with everything, and Charlie had said he had absolutely no issues with the way things were.

The baby shower attendees consisted of Max, Jessica and their son Michael; Nadia and Charlie; Sing, Cain, Alex, Kong and Bones.

Ash had, for the most part, stopped being involved with his gang for many years now, and had handed over the role of leader to Alex. They still kept in contact, and many members of his gang had attended their wedding (much to the confusion of Eiji's family), but he'd wanted to separate himself from that life as much as he could. And Aurora would never, _ever_ have anything to do with it, nor would she ever know that Ash had once been part of that world.

Ash and Eiji had said that gifts weren't necessary, but people still bought Aurora things anyway. Max's family had purchased some baby clothes, a couple of toys and a picture book for when she was a few months old. Nadia and Charlie gave her a traditional Chinese baby gown, which was deep red in colour. Ash's gang had pooled their money together to buy her a pair of overalls because it was all they could afford (Ash didn't care, he appreciated the gesture a lot).

Ash was surprised when he opened Cain's present.

"Sunglasses?" Ash asked. "They make them for babies?"

"They do," Cain said. "This way she can be as coo' as her dads." Cain's comment was met with laughter.

"They're too big for her now, though," Eiji said. "But once she fits them, we'll take a photo and send it to you."

"I'm lookin' forward to it," Cain nodded.

"Thanks, Cain," Ash said as he put the sunglasses to the side. Eiji thanked him too.

 

Sing, for some reason, had bought Aurora two presents. Ash thought it was a bit over the top, since she was just a baby, but he didn't say anything.

One of the gifts was a small stuffed cat plushie. "Unfortunately," Sing said, "I couldn't find any actual lynxes to get her."

Ash smirked back at him. "Very funny, Sing." 

The other gift was an intricately woven, dark-green clip-on hair bow, with a red sequin over the middle. It looked expensive.

"I know she won't have enough hair for a while," Sing explained, "But I thought it would suit her."

Ash was... slightly suspicious, although he didn't know exactly why. It was just a bow, after all.

"It's cute," Eiji said. "I can't wait for her to be able to wear it! Thanks, Sing!" Ash made no comments beyond thanking him.

 

"Hey... I have a question," Bones piped up, after the gift-giving was over.

"What?" Ash asked, figuring it was something stupid.

"Why is it called a baby shower?" Bones asked. "Babies don't even _take_ showers!"

Everyone in the room stared at him.

"I don' get it either," Kong said. "It makes no damn sense to me."

Ash groaned. "It's _because_ , you absolute morons," he sighed, "You're showering the baby with presents. And with love and affection."

"Ohhhhhh..." went Bones and Kong in unison. Why had Ash invited them again?

"So that's what it means..." a quiet voice whispered next to him.

" _Seriously_ , Eiji?" Ash raised an eyebrow at his husband.

"It's not _my_ fault that English makes no sense!" Eiji protested, blushing slightly. Ash had to stop himself from laughing, but some of their guests weren't as polite.

 

The rest of the baby shower was uneventful. Aurora was asleep for most of it, completely unaware of the fact that they were even holding this gathering solely for her.

Sing was the first to leave, as he had errands to attend to (Ash figured Yut Lung was bossing him around as usual). Ash saw him to the door. Sing asked him a question before he departed. "Have you told Blanca?"

Well, there was a name Ash hadn't thought about in a while. Blanca hadn't come up in the list of people to contact about Aurora's birth. He hadn't been invited to their wedding, either, although part of that was due to Ash having no fucking clue how to contact him. He still didn't know where the bastard was. Presumably he was still in the Caribbean somewhere.

"Even if I wanted to I wouldn't know how or where to find him," Ash said. "But no, we don't plan on telling him, he doesn't need to know."

"Fair enough," Sing shrugged. "It's your call. Although, if you _did_ want to get in touch with him, I can tell him for you."

"Why do you have his details?" Ash asked, perplexed. Sing had been on good terms with Blanca, but they hardly knew each other.

Sing paused. "Well..." he said slowly, " _I_ don't have his details."

So it was Yut Lung who did. That made more sense.

"Nah, he's not worth it," Ash said. "If he finds out, whatever, but I'm not going to waste my energy on him."

"Sweet," Sing grinned. "Anyway, I'm off. Be sure to call me if you need anything, dude!"

"Of course," Ash nodded.

He felt extremely grateful to have so many people supporting him and Eiji. Him and his... family.

He actually had a family now.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Guess who the bow's from? A certain somebody who wasn't invited to the baby shower! :>


	6. Sweet Dreams, Sleeping Beauty

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Aurora keeps changing and growing because that's what babies do! 
> 
> The Callenreeses enjoy a family lunch to celebrate Ash's birthday. Also, Ash goes back to work once the school year starts back up.

Aurora grew quickly. Every day she learnt new things, and each week she reached new milestones. By the time she was six weeks old, she was smiling at her parents, who both thought it was the most precious smile in the entire world (and, to Ash, she had tough competition with Eiji). Luckily, she was healthy (they regularly took her in for checkups just in case), and Ash and Eiji were mostly used to their interrupted sleep, although Ash occasionally still had a moment of panic when he was first woken up by her cries.

Ash was lucky himself in that Aurora had been born close to the end of the academic year, so he only had to take a month of paternity leave before it was summer break. He'd been in contact with his boss (he'd wanted to apologise to her directly) and he said that he'd be back at work in September unless something went wrong (Eiji had told him off for thinking like this again) but she told him not to worry about it.

They frequently took her out for walks, which she seemed to enjoy, even if she didn't react much and spent most of the time asleep. She was becoming more alert by the time she was three months old -- which was just in time for Ash's birthday. He'd never been one for celebrating his birthday until Eiji had started throwing parties for him, although in recent years they'd just spent it together and usually ate somewhere fancy for dinner. Eiji's own birthday was celebrated in a similar fashion, and Ash hadn't realised he didn't actually know when Eiji's birthday was until a few years into their relationship. Eiji had said he'd simply forgotten to tell him, but Ash didn't buy that.

Since they had Aurora with them now, they'd decided just to get lunch a few days before Ash's actual birthday at a small café that was on one of their normal routes. It had plenty of shade outdoors and on the day there weren't many people there. They were sat at one of the round tables (that had an umbrella in the middle), with Aurora propped up in her stroller.

Aurora had recently discovered her own hands and had become extremely fascinated with them. She was now making nonsensical noises at them, and Ash had fun trying to mimic her. He wished he could understand what she was actually trying to say, even though he knew it was probably nothing much beyond her simply trying to communicate. She also had quite a bit more hair now than she had at birth, but it was still too thin for her to wear the bow she'd been given at her baby shower, and Cain's sunglasses were still far too big on her.

Ash was in the middle of making a comment to Eiji about Aurora's hands when a waitress approached their table.

"Oh my," the waitress remarked, smiling. "She's very cute!"

Aurora looked up at her blankly.

"Yeah, she means you," Ash chuckled. Aurora turned to face him. "One day you'll get it, don't worry."

"So what'll it be?" the waitress asked, amused.

Aside from their usual drink orders (Ash always ordered coffee and Eiji always ordered green tea if it was on the menu), Ash chose a salmon and cream cheese bagel and Eiji went with a tuna salad. They'd fed Aurora before going out, so she wouldn't need another bottle until they got home after lunch.

"And do you need anything for the baby?" the waitress asked as she finished writing down their orders.

Ash and Eiji exchanged glances. "No, thank you," Eiji said politely. Ash nodded in agreement.

"Understood," she said. "I'll be back with your drinks shortly."

 People often commented on Aurora while they were out with her. For the most part, things had been positive, but a couple of people had given them judgemental looks -- thankfully, nobody had actually said anything, although if they ever did, Ash would make sure they wouldn't be saying _anything_ ever again.

Max and his family had continued to be a great help to them, offering to take care of things like groceries. Now that Aurora was a bit older, it was easier to do such things, but it hadn't been initially. Ash and Eiji had both been exhausted by everything, and even Eiji sometimes forgot a chore or two, which was rare for him.

But neither of them minded their constant states of tiredness, as they felt extremely minor compared to how happy they both were. Every day was a delight. Ash still couldn't entirely ward off the negative voices in his head, but they were being kept at bay for the time being.

It was weird, Ash thought, being this content with everything in life. He had a good job, a loving husband, a wonderful daughter... a perfect family. Sure, Ash wasn't perfect himself, but Eiji kept reassuring him that he'd made a lot of progress since they'd first met. He couldn't believe they'd now known each other for fourteen years, and been in a relationship for nine of those years. He'd have to do something for their tenth anniversary, but he wasn't sure what. In a sense, Aurora was the best gift possible, so he wasn't sure how he could top her.

Ash kept watching Aurora as he ate his lunch. She looked mildly interested in what he was doing, but she wasn't anywhere near old enough to start eating proper food yet. That was still another three months away, at least.

"You'll be able to have a bagel in a few years," Ash told her. She gurgled at him. "Yeah, this thing," he said, pointing at his mostly-eaten bagel with his fork as she stared at him with her large green eyes. "They're pretty tasty." She made another noise.

Eiji chuckled at him. "What?" Ash asked, sarcastically pouting.

"Nothing," Eiji smiled, shaking his head. "It's just... really cute."

"I know," Ash said. "She's adorable, isn't she?" He tried to smile at Aurora, who said nothing.

"No, not that," Eiji said. "Well... yes, that, too, but..."

"What?" Ash repeated. "What're you trying to say, Eiji?" To this day, he still didn't always understand what Eiji was on about.

" _You're_ cute too, Ash," Eiji replied, his smile growing wider (and softer). Ash felt himself blushing. He returned to eating his bagel.

"You're cuter," Ash mumbled.

"N-No way!" Eiji protested. "I'm nowhere near as cute as you are!"

"Eiji," Ash sighed, "I think this is what, the seventeenth time we've had this argument?"

"Yes," Eiji said, "Because you can't agree to disagree!" He paused before adding, "You were keeping track?"

Ash laughed quietly. "I've been keeping score," he admitted. "Pretty sure we're currently tied."

Eiji also laughed. "Of course we are."

Most of their 'arguments' were about silly things like this: who was cuter (this was the one thing they absolutely could not agree on), who was the better kisser (Eiji had reluctantly agreed that it was actually Ash -- although Ash secretly thought it was Eiji, he just didn't want to admit it), who made the better coffee (Eiji), who picked the better date spots (Ash, but he had the unfair advantage of being much more familiar with New York than Eiji did), who chose the better movies for them to watch (Eiji won unanimously, even Sing had stopped coming over for movie night when it was Ash's turn to pick the movie), and who had the better fashion sense (Ash, if only because he was more adventurous in this clothing choices than Eiji was).

After they finished eating and had paid their bill (and left the waitress a rather generous tip), they made their way back home. Aurora had, by this point, fallen asleep, as she'd gotten bored of her hands after a while and had apparently decided that her parents weren't all that interesting either. Once they were back at their apartment, she woke up to be fed and changed and went back to sleep.

"I'm jealous," Ash said, as he placed Aurora in her crib (she was now at the stage where she was rolling over and had needed to be moved into the guest room -- they'd set up a baby monitor next to her crib so that they could hear her when she woke up in the night), watching her sleep peacefully. "I wish I could sleep like that."

"You do," Eiji reminded him, kissing him on the cheek. "It's still impossible to wake you up some mornings."

"Yeah, but..." Ash said slowly, "I mean like... she doesn't have nightmares and stuff."

"...Oh, yeah..."

Ash had been taking medication for some years now to help with his sleep, but he was still sometimes haunted by the ghosts of his past. The nightmares weren't as intense as they used to be, and it was only rarely that he woke up crying in the middle of the night nowadays, but Eiji had told him that he still whimpered in his sleep some nights and sounded like he was in pain. Ash had no recollection of how he acted while he was asleep, but he believed Eiji's words.

"You've been more settled at night since Aurora was born, though," Eiji commented.

"That's because she doesn't let me sleep long enough to start having any nightmares," Ash pointed out with a quiet laugh. Eiji laughed too.

"She's not waking up as much as she did at first," Eiji said. "Maybe she'll sleep through the night eventually."

"I hope so," Ash said, still gazing down at their daughter. 

"We should let her sleep, Ash," Eiji said, giving Ash another soft kiss.

"You're right," Ash agreed.

He followed Eiji to the door, but turned back to Aurora before exiting.

"Sweet dreams, Sleeping Beauty," he whispered.

 

* * *

 

On the day of Ash's birthday, apart from their family and friends sending him well-wishes and congratulations, they spent the day doing nothing except for playing with Aurora. Once she'd gone to sleep for the night, the two of them took a longer shower than usual before getting into bed themselves.

"Happy birthday, Ash," Eiji said for about the fifth time that day, holding Ash closely from behind. "I love you so, so much."

"I love you too, Eiji," Ash replied as he closed his eyes. "Much more than I can put into words. Thank you..."

"Good night... Aslan."

Eiji sometimes called Ash by his real name. He didn't mind it, somehow. He wished he could do something similar in return, but there was no equivalent.

"Good night, Eiji," he whispered.

 

* * *

 

Ash went back to work in September, like he'd said he was going to. His boss had allowed him to only work part-time, as it was the beginning of the school year, and the subsitute that had taken over for Ash when Aurora had been born had been keen on continuing to fill in for him if needed.

His boss made mention of him during her staff briefing.

"And, lastly," she said, after having finished with all the boring formalities, "I would just like to congratulate Professor Callenreese on the birth of his daughter back in May." Ash stared down at his notes as he was applauded. It was silly to him, he hadn't done any of the work. "A few words, Professor Callenreese?"

Shit.

Ash didn't mind public speaking too much (he was used to telling his gang members what to do, and he liked giving his lectures), but being put on the spot wasn't exactly his favourite thing in the world. He reluctantly stood up.

"Um." He scanned the room. "So, er, my - my husband and I were fortunate enough to be blessed with a healthy baby girl four months ago, thanks to the assistance of a good friend of ours who was willing to be a surrogate for us." He paused, trying to think of what else to say. "She's, uh, really cute. And small. She mostly just sleeps, but it's... it's really fun." He felt his face grow hot. How was he meant to describe his daughter other than being really fucking cute?

Some of his colleagues laughed while they applauded him again.

"I... I love her," he said. "And I'm... grateful that I was given this opportunity. But most importantly, I really don't know where I'd be without my husband. And. Uh." He'd run out of ideas. This was enough, right? "...Thank you," he added quietly as he sat back down.

"Professor Callenreese will be taking as much time off as he needs until his daughter's a bit older," his boss went on to explain, "But he's expressed the desire to come back to work. Raising a child is a lot of effort, so I won't tolerate any negativity. The same goes for anyone else who has young children, or plans on starting a family. Understood?"

Ash was glad he had his boss on his side. She had children of her own, so she knew what it was like -- or, at least, somewhat. He was still eternally thankful that she hadn't fired him for not showing up to work unexplained (well, semi-unexplained) one day.

His students were excited to have him teaching them again, and he didn't shy away from telling them the reasons behind his absence. He did have to explain the concept of surrogacy to someone who asked, but his students seemed understanding and supportive. One of his female students commented that she hoped her future husband was as amazing as Ash's made his sound (he was pleased he was doing Eiji's awesomeness some justice), to which Ash said that he still had no idea how he'd managed to find someone as wonderful and perfect as Eiji.

For once in his life, the future was looking bright. He was truly happy, and was no longer scared that his happiness would be snatched away from him. All he wanted was for this peaceful, loving family life to continue on forever.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I should probably give his boss a name at some point.
> 
> Also you know what they were up to in that shower. Ash had a good birthday <3


	7. The Princess Has Spoken

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This time, the Callenreeses go out for a meal for Eiji's birthday. And they run into someone.
> 
> Disclaimer: No babies actually speak this chapter. That's next chapter, maybe.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know Eiji doesn't have an official birthday but I'm making it November for the sake of this fic.
> 
> Aurora might actually start doing stuff next chapter, sorry it's taking her a while to be interesting lol.

Ash had been getting busier with his work, and unfortunately Aurora was usually asleep by the time he got home, so he was only able to enjoy her company in the mornings during the week. Eiji said he didn't mind looking after Aurora during the day, as Ash was currently making enough money to support them all. They'd agreed that they didn't want her to go to preschool until she was three at the earliest, and the only person they wanted to trust with watching her if they ever needed a babysitter was Sing (Nadia spent all day at Chang Dai and Charlie was mostly at the police station doing police things, so they were out of the question), but Sing was sometimes out of town or preoccupied babysitting someone else (Sing's own words). That said, Ash _really_ didn't like the idea of leaving their daughter with someone other than himself or Eiji even though he knew Eiji would be wanting to start work again himself and probably got a bit sick of having nobody but a baby to talk to, despite what Eiji had said to him. But he believed Eiji, so he didn't press the issue.

The good thing about living in an apartment was that they didn't have any trick-or-treaters knocking on their door for Halloween. Eiji delighted in informing Aurora of Ash's fear of pumpkins, which made Ash extremely thankful that she couldn't understand a word he was saying. Eiji mocked him about it every Halloween, to the point where he'd tell Ash to 'watch out for the scary monsters' whenever they passed by festive displays involving pumpkins and Jack-o'-lanterns. If it had been anyone else, Ash would've taken one of the pumpkins and whacked them on the head with it, but because it was Eiji, he was allowed to get away with it. But only barely.

 

Eiji's birthday was in November. He didn't like celebrating it, but, much like with Ash's birthday, they usually went out for a meal together. This year was no different, except that Aurora -- who was now laughing when her parents made funny faces at her (Ash spent perhaps almost too much time doing this) and had recently started eating baby food (she seemed to like the apple and pear flavours the most, but it was hard to tell) -- would be celebrating it with them, so they had to plan around her. The days were now starting to grow colder, which meant that Aurora wasn't leaving the house as much. When she did, they made sure to dress her warmly in a woollen sweater on top of her onsie. If it was cold enough, she wore a beanie that had been hand-made by Nadia. And she now had enough hair that she needed her bangs to be clipped back with the bow she'd been gifted. She was still slightly too small for Cain's sunglasses, however.

On the Saturday before Eiji's birthday, the family went out for an early dinner to a Japanese restaurant. Eiji still liked Japanese cuisine, but never got the opportunity to eat it much, as Ash preferred to stick to his greasy American meals. Eiji had been cooking less what with taking care of Aurora nowadays, so a lot of nights they just had takeout (usually pizza). Ash had suggested this particular restaurant as it was close to their apartment and the area wasn't too crowded. It was warm enough that day for Aurora not to need her beanie or sweater (which meant she had her bow on -- it didn't exactly work with the beanie), but they still stowed them away in her stroller just in case.

They chose a table outside after being told the seating options by a waitress (who commented on how cute Aurora was) and poured over their menus.

"Hmm," Ash said, brows furrowed. "I never know what I feel like with Japanese food."

"Just go for noodles," Eiji suggested. "They're something simple enough."

"Hmm..." Ash said again. Aurora, who was sitting up in her stroller watching them intently, made a noise that kind of sounded like she was trying to mimic him. "What, you think I should have noodles too?" he jokingly asked her. She gurgled at him.

Eiji chuckled. "See? She agrees with me."

Ash smiled at her. "Well, guess I've got no choice. The princess has spoken."

Both of them called Aurora several different, silly nicknames. 'Princess' was one of Ash's favourites, and Eiji had recently adopted it too. Then there were the usual ones, like 'Honey' and 'Darling' (Eiji had used 'Sweetheart' initially, but Ash had to tell him to stop because it reminded him of... things he would rather not be reminded of. Eiji had then profusely apologised to him, but it's not like Ash expected Eiji to know _everything_ that upset him). Sometimes they called her 'Rory' or 'Rora', and Eiji called her a few things using the Japanese method for nicknaming, which included 'Aarin' and 'Rocchan'. Ash quite liked 'Aarin'. 

Ash decided that noodles were probably a good idea, so he ordered chicken ramen. Eiji chose curry with rice along with a side dish of miso soup (as he typically did). Ash humoured him and chose green tea for his drink that night (it was too late in the day for coffee, after all). They hadn't yet started Aurora on much other than pureed baby food, so they didn't order anything for her, as they had brought a sippy cup of water with them.

"If only you knew how cute people think you are," Ash said to their daughter, after he overheard a couple at another table whispering something about her (he pretended not to hear them).

"Even the cashiers at the supermarket think she's adorable," Eiji laughed quietly. "A couple of them know her by name now..."

"She deserves it," Ash said as he leant over and softly poked Aurora's cheek. She giggled -- Ash's heart melted whenever she laughed. It was the cutest sound in the world. "You'll understand eventually," he added, smiling again.

 About a third of the way into his meal, Eiji placed his chopsticks down.

"You okay?" Ash asked with a mouthful of noodles.

"...Yeah," Eiji said as he stood up. "I'm just going to the bathroom for a minute."

"A'ight." Ash went back to eating, although he noticed Aurora watch her father walk off. "It's okay," he said. "He'll be back soon." He distracted her by making a funny face, which she laughed at.

 

Not too long after Eiji had left, Aurora made a noise at something. "What is it, Honey?" She was looking somewhere behind Ash. Was there someone watching them?

He slowly turned around, half expecting just to see a pigeon.

A pigeon would have been much more preferable to what he _did_ see.

"I'm impressed," the smug voice said. "She noticed me immediately. Most people don't manage that."

It was Yut Lung. Again. Why did Ash keep running in to this motherfucker? He'd gone _years_ without seeing him (or thinking about him, for that matter), yet he'd run into him twice in the past year. Which deity had he angered to cause this?

Ash didn't respond. He wanted to scoop Aurora up in his arms and protect her, but he didn't have anything to protect either of them with. Eiji had made him stop carrying his gun around at all times (although Ash did still keep one in their car), so he was unarmed. If they'd been eating elsewhere, he would've had a knife to at least try and stab the asshole with, but a chopstick would, at best, be able to poke him in the eye and temporarily blind him.

But he also didn't want to have to use violence in front of Aurora. So he forced himself to sit there and not react.

"What do you want?" Ash asked through gritted teeth.

"Nothing," Yut Lung said. "I was just walking by and I happened to notice you. I wouldn't have stopped if she didn't spot me." He looked down at Aurora. Ash was unable to read his expression. "She has your eyes, huh..."

"I'm aware," Ash hissed, glaring at Yut Lung. His hatred for the younger man had started to boil over the edge and he couldn't stop himself from blurting out: "If you come any closer to her I'll fucking strangle you."

Yut Lung flinched for a second. " _Please_ ," he scoffed, now with a very readable expression on his face -- an offended one. "I wouldn't hurt a _baby_."

"Not even our baby?" Ash didn't trust a single word he said.

"...No," Yut Lung answered flatly. "And I don't plan on hurting you or your... husband either, wherever he is."

"I'm right here," Eiji announced, walking over to the table. Aurora went "Uu" at him as he sat down. He smiled at her before turning to face Yut Lung. "It's been a while."

Ash hadn't said anything to Eiji about how Yut Lung had offered him that ride to the hospital. The last time either of them had seen Yut Lung before that was... just after they'd returned from living in Japan and had run into him outside the airport (he'd been on his way to Hong Kong at the time).

"I apologise for interrupting your, uh, family outing," Yut Lung said, although Ash doubted that he was actually sorry. "But I am pleased to see that she's doing well."

"Bullshit," Ash spat. He _knew_ Yut Lung didn't give a shit and had no idea why he was trying to appear like he did.

Yut Lung narrowed his eyes. "Have it your way," he sneered. "Oh, there _is_ one more thing..."

"What?" Ash hissed again, very tempted just to go over and punch him.

"I haven't said anything to Blanca, but I don't think he knows since he hasn't mentioned it to me. Does it matter if I tell him?"

"Do whatever the fuck you want," Ash sighed. "He's going to find out eventually anyway. It's not like he's going to bother coming back to the States, either, so go for it."

"...I'll inform him whenever I next see him, then," Yut Lung said slowly. "But I'm busy, so I don't know when that will be."

"Hey, yeah," Ash said, "Aren't you meant to be in Hong Kong?" He remembered what Sing had said to him recently.

"I can't spend all my time there," Yut Lung said. "It's suffocating, that place. It's somewhere I... don't really want to remember, as it happens, despite it being where I was born."

Ash didn't want to admit that he understood. So, instead, he said, "Got it. Now can you leave us alone?"

"Certainly," Yut Lung nodded. 

 

"By the way," he added, looking at Aurora again, who had been staring at him the whole time, "You should be lucky you have such caring parents. Treasure them. Trust me, you'll appreciate it eventually."

"What d'you--" Eiji, surprisingly, was the one to speak up, but Yut Lung cut him off.

"Oh, and... I like your bow. It suits you," he smirked at their daughter.

Maybe it was the smirk. Maybe it was that she could sense how tense her parents were. But Aurora, who had been well-behaved all night, burst into tears.

Ash instantly had her out of her stroller and in his arms to try and settle her.

"Please leave," Eiji said sharply to Yut Lung. Ash wasn't watching anything other than Aurora. He tried his usual tactics of trying to soothe her by telling her it was okay and that she was safe.

"Done."

Ash glanced over his shoulder as he watched Yut Lung waltz off. As soon as he was out of sight, he turned back to Aurora. "Don't worry about him," Ash said quietly. "He won't hurt you. I think. Sshh, it's okay now..."

She did soon stop crying and ended up falling asleep, so Ash put her back in her stroller.

"We should finish eating and get going," he said as he picked his chopsticks back up. It was more of an order than a suggestion.

"Yeah, we should," Eiji agreed, also resuming his meal.

They wasted no time eating and made it back home before it got too late. Ash wished they could've stayed a bit longer and had dessert, but Yut Lung aside, they were all rather tired.

 

Ash _definitely_ had to do something special for Eiji's birthday (which was on Wednesday). There was one thing he thought of as he was lying in bed that night, but he wasn't sure if it would work. Especially not with Aurora around.

He'd give it a go, at least. Eiji deserved it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> What do you mean I can't shoehorn my favourite character into a fic where he has no involvement in the plot at all? :(
> 
> Don't worry, he'll be fucking off for a while after this!
> 
> Also Ash has some... fun things planned for Eiji's birthday.


	8. I Couldn't Ask For Anything More

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ash makes sure he gives Eiji a good birthday present, but it has to wait until Thanksgiving break.
> 
> Aurora says her first word! She's rolling around everywhere and is now teething.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Eiji is a good husband. Ash is also a good husband. And both of them are good dads.
> 
> Look at that, Aurora's almost doing things!
> 
> PS I may or may not have forgotten entirely about mentioning Thanksgiving last chapter so uh... Eiji's birthday is at the very start of November. Y'all Americans have too many holidays.

The next night, after Aurora had gone to sleep, Ash decided to tell Eiji about his plans for Eiji's birthday. He knew Eiji would probably refuse, but it was something he wanted to do.

"So... Eiji," he said, as the two of them got into bed.

"Yeah?" Eiji asked, taking his hair out of its messy ponytail. He'd let his hair grow out over the years, and it usually fell just below his shoulders. Ash thought he looked much cuter with his hair down, but with Aurora it was far more practical to wear it tied up during the day.

"For... your birthday..." Ash began slowly, twiddling his thumbs. "I was thinking, um. D'you... wanna have sex, maybe?"

Ash couldn't actually remember the last time they'd had sex. It had been a couple of years at this point, maybe, but he didn't exactly keep track. Neither of them thought about it much, after all, extended showers aside.

 

Eiji took Ash's hands in his and looked his husband directly in the eyes.

"Ash," he said, "We've talked about this. You don't have to force yourself. I know you're not comfortable with it, so--"

"But I _want to_ ," Ash insisted. Eiji had reacted exactly how he'd thought he would. "You've been busy taking care of Aurora, and we've both been pretty stressed lately -- don't give me that look, I _know_ you're stressed too -- so I thought... it would be a good idea. For the both of us."

Eiji frowned, looking concerned. "But last tim--"

"Last time was ages ago, Eiji," Ash said. "Please. Don't worry about me. I just... want to make you feel good. And stuff."

The last time they'd attempted, it hadn't ended well, as Ash had randomly been reminded of a previous bad experience ( _not_ one with Eiji) and had to quickly get Eiji to stop before he had a major breakdown. Thankfully, Eiji understood immediately, and spent the rest of the night calming Ash down and apologising to him.

Eiji paused. Ash was pleased he was as hesitant as he was, but it sometimes got annoying. This was one of those times.

"But you have work," Eiji reminded him. "It's Thanksgiving in a couple of weeks, let's... at least wait until then, okay? That way, if... if anything happens, you won't have to worry about going to work the next day."

He raised a good point. It would be pretty awkward if Ash had to give lectures while uncomfortable. "Alright," he said. "Then sometime during Thanksgiving break, yeah?"

"Okay," Eiji said with a smile. "I do think... maybe we should think up a... Uh, what was it called?"

Ash had no idea what he was talking about. "Can't help you there, Eiji."

"Oh!" Eiji exclaimed, remembering the word he was looking for. "It's, um, a safe word, I think? You know, if you want me to stop."

Where the _hell_ had Eiji learnt what a safe word was? Porn? Ash chose not to ask. The gesture was more than enough.

"That's a good idea," Ash said, leaning in and kissing Eiji. "Got any thoughts, Eiji?"

"...Not really," Eiji mumbled, blushing. "I'll let you know if I come up with any."

Ash laughed and kissed him again. "Sure thing. Let's go to sleep."

"Good night, Ash. I love you."

"Good night, Eiji. I love you too."

 

Ash normally didn't give a shit about Thanksgiving (other than getting time off work), but he was looking forward to it this year. It was the first Thanksgiving he'd be spending with his family, as his biological family hadn't really celebrated it when he was little except for sometimes having a big Thanksgiving dinner, and Eiji was Japanese, so the holiday meant nothing to him (although he'd said he liked the concept of acknowledging being thankful for your loved ones).

Max's family had always invited them over for Thanksgiving in the past, but the atmosphere made Ash feel rather uncomfortable (not that that was anyone's fault in particular) so they hadn't been the last three years. Ash had explained it to Max and Jessica, who said they weren't bothered by it and had felt bad that they hadn't considered how Ash would feel in a family setting. They usually still met up sometime between Christmas and New Year's (Max always threw a New Year's Eve party, despite Jessica's complaints), though, so things worked out anyway.

 

* * *

 

The first day of Thanksgiving break, Sing came over to visit, as he hadn't seen Aurora in a few weeks. He remarked on how different Aurora seemed compared to the last time he hung out with them. Aurora was currently teething, which meant she was somewhat grumpy and prone to crying more frequently than usual.

Sing stayed and played with Aurora for an hour before she'd had enough of him and needed to be distracted from the discomfort her teeth were causing her. None had broken through her gums yet, but both Ash and Eiji could feel a couple of bumps where her front teeth would soon be poking out from.

Before he'd left, Sing had asked them if they had any plans for Thanksgiving, and they'd said they hadn't. Which wasn't _entirely_ true, but the plans they had weren't directly related to Thanksgiving, to be fair.

 

Eiji had proposed a rather interesting safe word to Ash the night before.

"Really?" Ash asked, raising an eyebrow. "Lasagna, of all things?"

"I-I thought it should be something that would otherwise never come up in a sexual context," Eiji explained, blushing as he did so. "So I thought food would be a place to start."

Ash didn't want to admit it, but it made sense. The idea of someone shouting 'lasagna' during sex amused him greatly. "I've got nothing, so let's go for it." 

They'd agreed to wait a couple of days.

 

* * *

 

For Thanksgiving itself, Eiji had insisted on cooking Turkey for dinner, despite Ash not being the biggest fan of Turkey. Aurora appeared to want to try it, but Ash thought it was best until she actually had some teeth before giving her proper meat. She now ate a few soft fruits, like bananas and pears, but for the most part was still on baby food.

The day after Thanksgiving, they were both entertaining Aurora as she was lying on her mat and having fun rolling around.

"Look at how _clever_ you are!" Eiji beamed at her as she reached forwards and grabbed one of her plastic toys in her hand and showed it off to them.

"You're super smart, you know," Ash smiled.

 

"Dada!"

 

Ash and Eiji looked at each other, both processing what had just happened.

"Did she-"

"Yeah, she did..."

"But which-"

"I... dunno..."

Aurora gurgled at them.

The problem, as they'd just discovered, with both of them calling themselves 'Dad' to her was that, when Aurora had -- very clearly -- said her first word, they didn't know _which_ 'Dada' she meant. So they decided that she'd probably meant _both_ 'Dada's and left it at that. It wasn't the sort of thing to argue about. What was important was what had taken place.

Aurora rolled over again and started sucking on her toy, acting as if nothing had happened. 

"...Tonight?" Ash asked Eiji quietly. It felt right.

"...Yeah," Eiji whispered. Ash noticed he was looking teary-eyed, so he leant over and gently kissed him. "I can't believe she's... talking..."

"She's been talking for a while," Ash laughed. "This is just the first time we've been able to understand her."

"You're right," Eiji smiled. "I'm... so glad we both got to hear it."

"Me too," Ash said, resting his head on Eiji's shoulder as he liked to do.

 

Aurora was now sleeping through most of the night, waking up maybe once or twice for a bottle. Despite mostly being on solid food, she still required baby formula to keep her full. She napped during the day as well, which meant her parents at least got a short break where they didn't have to constantly worry about keeping her out of trouble (not that she had much trouble to get into, but she _was_ a baby who was now able to move around on her own). 

Her not waking up as frequently also provided a better chance for them to be intimate. Once she'd fallen asleep for the night, Ash went and showered alone and got himself ready.

 _It's okay_ , he told himself. He was now starting to get a bit nervous, despite being the one who suggested it in the first place. _It's Eiji. He won't hurt you. You won't hurt him. You want this, he wants this. Go give him a good birthday present_.

 

They ended up not needing to use the safe word. Ash enjoyed himself more than he normally did, and Eiji said that he'd felt good, too.

"Sorry for such a belated present," Ash joked as they were snuggled up in bed together (after they'd both showered again and had checked on Aurora).

"It was worth the wait," Eiji murmured happily. "Thank you, Aslan. I couldn't ask for anything more than this. I love you. I'm proud of you. Thank you."

Ash didn't really know what to say. Eiji was exaggerating, but Ash was glad he had such a loving and supportive husband. And an adorable daughter, too. "I should be the one thanking you, Eiji," he said quietly. "You mean the world to me, and I wouldn't have it any other way. I love you. I'm glad you liked your present."

Eiji chuckled quietly. "I'll have to give you something amazing next year."

"You give me something amazing every day, Eiji," Ash whispered. "We should get to sleep."

"We should," Eiji agreed. "Good night, Aslan."

"Good night, Eiji."

 

At least there was only a month until winter break. Aurora would be celebrating her first Christmas, and although she'd have no concept of the holiday, she'd still be getting piles of presents -- not just from them, either.

Cain's sunglasses managed to fit her now... but she didn't seem to like wearing them much, so after taking a (rather cute) photo of her with them on and sending it to Cain, they put them on the bookshelf in her room for when she was older.

Other than the first time Aurora had said 'Dada', they hadn't made out any other actual words from her. She still made noises at them a lot, which were getting harder for Ash to imitate. Eiji had begun reading baby books to her, mostly ones with animals & their sounds and very basic words like 'cat'.

 

It was fascinating, entertaining and completely and utterly _wonderful_ watching Aurora grow and develop. Every day was full of bliss for all three of them.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm contemplating writing a separate thing for the times AshEiji get intimate with each other so that I can keep the rating of this fic 'M', but I don't know if anyone would be interested at all. They don't get up to sex very much, but occasionally they do, so...
> 
> That said, there are only two scenes so far and I'm unsure if it's worth writing them in detail, lol.


	9. What a Surprise!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ash is happy to finally get some time off work again to spend with his family over winter break.
> 
> It's Aurora's first Christmas! She eats things now! And she can almost crawl!
> 
> The Callenreeses attend Max's annual New Year's Eve party. And so does someone they haven't seen in several years...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thankfully for me, Christmas is one holiday that I actually know shit about! Although we celebrate it in summer here and do stuff like go to the beach, which would be, uh, a rather silly activity to do in December in New York, I'd imagine.
> 
> Americans do New Year's Eve parties, r-right?

Winter break seemed to take ages to arrive. Ash was preoccupied with finals week, although he didn't really mind too much as he spent most of the day doing nothing but keeping an eye on students who were taking tests. When his attention wasn't required, he usually looked through photos of Aurora on his phone. Eiji had taken most of them, of course, but he'd managed to snap a few himself -- his weren't nearly as well-taken, naturally.

Sometimes, Ash's students would ask him for updates on Aurora. He was hesitant to show them any photos of her, as silly as it was, but whenever someone got him started, he always got sidetracked and spent the rest of the lecture (or most of it) talking about her. From what he could tell, nobody seemed to care, and he hadn't been approached by anyone to tell him to stop, either.

Ash and Eiji had discussed potentially going away for winter break, but it was pretty expensive to travel anywhere, and now that it was properly winter, they didn't want to risk getting Aurora sick. Eiji still took her outside if it was a sunny day, but not for very long. Thankfully, the heating in their apartment was decent enough to keep them warm during the cold, icy winter months.

The things they'd managed to agree on were that they'd relax over winter break, spend Christmas as a family, and join Max's family for New Year's Eve, if only for a few hours.

 

* * *

 

Ash was _very_ pleased when classes finally ended for the semester. He would be able to actually spend his weekdays with Aurora, and relieve Eiji of his duties for a while. He felt guilty that he wasn't able to help out more, and knew Eiji was probably rather worn out by this point in the year.

Aurora was now almost able to crawl, but she hadn't entirely gotten the hang of it yet. She had, however, mastered the art of rolling all over the living room, so they'd made a necessary purchase of a playpen. Aurora didn't seem to notice that her area of movement had been greatly limited and continued playing with her toys as she always did.

 

Other than the initial incident, she hadn't said any other actual words. Eiji had informed Ash that he _thought_ she'd called him 'Dada' once more, but he admitted that he might have misheard her. Ash wanted to think that Eiji had indeed heard her correctly, but either way, she was meeting her milestones as they'd been told she would by her doctor, and all her immunisations were up to date (Eiji had to take her to any appointments, Ash couldn't stand being anywhere near the doctor's office and needles weren't exactly his favourite thing). They'd really lucked out in that she'd, for the most part, been perfectly healthy, save for a couple of reactions to her shots and a rather bad instance of diarrhoea.

Ash was extremely thankful that Eiji was really good at taking care of Aurora, because he still had no idea what he was doing with her. He bathed her during the weekends, but always asked Eiji to supervise in case he did something wrong or forgot a step in cleaning her. Eiji said Ash was worrying too much, and that he was doing it perfectly, but Ash's anxiety prevented him from fully believing Eiji's praises.

 

For Christmas, they got Aurora a new pacifier (she didn't always use one, but it did help settle her at night now that she was having fewer bottles), a cute pair of socks with sloths on them (not that she knew what sloths were), another bow (her hair had gotten even longer, and Ash was now convinced that Yut Lung had given the first bow to them, so he was more than happy to stop using it) and a small rattle that was supposedly meant to help soothe her when her teeth were bothering her.

As Aurora did now, in fact, have three of her front teeth, she liked biting and chewing on everything. She'd been doing this for some time, but one thing she enjoyed doing was sticking her parents' fingers in her mouth (they tried to get her to stop, but she was determined -- they always made sure their hands were clean when handling her to begin with, but this made them be extra careful) and the addition of sharp teeth wasn't very pleasant for either of them. She was also eating more food, and had taken a liking to rice, much to the delight of Eiji.

Eiji had cooked a roast chicken dinner for them on Christmas Day, and Aurora was able to participate. She enjoyed the vegetables (she'd pointed at the carrots and loudly babbled to ask for a second helping as soon as she'd finished swallowing her first mouthful of them) but they didn't try her on the chicken itself yet. She'd be at that stage soon, however.

Eiji's Christmas present to Ash was a hand-knitted scarf, which he'd been making over the last month while Ash was at work. He said it wasn't perfect, but it damn well _was_ perfect to Ash, and he told Eiji he'd be wearing the shit out of it when he needed it. Ash had bought Eiji some high-quality green tea that had been imported from Japan (Eiji loved his green tea, especially in the winter) and a new wallet (he'd had his current one for years and Ash had noticed that it was starting to fall apart).

 

After putting a very satisfied Aurora to bed (wearing her new socks, as it was a cooler night), Ash found himself being kissed by Eiji once they were in the hallway.

"Merry Christmas, Aslan," Eiji whispered, gently hugging him.

"Couldn't you have waited until we were in bed?" Ash jokingly asked as he returned the hug.

"Mmm, not really," Eiji chuckled, giving Ash a kiss. "It's been so nice having you home..."

"Yeah," Ash murmured, kissing Eiji back. "Sorry for making you do everything, Eiji. Merry Christmas."

"It's okay," Eiji replied. "I'm having the time of my life watching her grow. She makes me forget about all my worries... Just like you do..."

"You wanna... go take a shower?" Ash asked quietly, whispering into Eiji's ear.

"...Sure."

They ended up going to bed quite a bit later than they'd intended to that night.

 

* * *

 

Max's New Year's Eve party was a 'come whenever you feel like it' kind of gathering. By the time the Callenreeses arrived soon after four o'clock, there were already several other guests present. Other than the three of them and Max's family, Nadia and Charlie were there, along with some of Max's friends (including police officer Antonio Jenkins, Max's colleague Robert and his boss Rogers). Sing had been invited but he was currently overseas. There was also someone else there that they hadn't been expecting to see at all.

"Ibe-san?!" Eiji exclaimed, his face lighting up as he hung his coat on the rack by the door. "What a surprise!"

 

The last time they'd seen Ibe had been when they were living in Japan. He was still a photographer, but unlike Eiji, he specialised in people. Eiji kept in contact with him regularly, but Ibe had been too busy to make it over to America (and it was quite expensive, so neither of them blamed him at all).

 

"Hey, Ei-chan! And you too, Ash!" Ibe greeted, walking over to them.

Ash was in the middle of taking Aurora out of her baby carrier (when they didn't need to transport her very far, they opted to use a front-facing baby carrier that one wore on their chest) when Ibe addressed him. "Hi, Ibe," he said, handing a wriggling Aurora to Eiji once she was free. "What're you doing all the way over here?"

Ibe laughed. "I've come to see you two... er, three," he said. "Why else?"

Ash frowned slightly. "Surely we're not worth the journey?"

"Ei-chan's family sent me," Ibe explained with a chuckle. "They said they're worried."

"But I contact my sister all the time," Eiji sighed. "They're overreacting."

Ibe shrugged. "That's what I told them," he said. "I said, 'Ei-chan isn't an idiot, he'll be fine', but they _insisted_..."

"Ugh," Eiij groaned. "Sorry, Ibe-san..."

"Well, it's no big deal," Ibe smiled. "I've wanted to see you anyway." He bent down so that he was at eye-level with Aurora, who had been staring at the strange man since he'd started talking to her parents. "And you're Aurora, then? I'm Ibe, nice to meet you." He extended a hand, although Ash was sure he knew that Aurora wouldn't know what to do with it.

"Bah!" Aurora replied loudly, after looking perplexed at Ibe's hand for a few moments.

"I think," Ash laughed, "She's saying hello."

"I'm sure she is," Ibe nodded, standing up. "She's even cuter than she is in the photos."

"She's the cutest thing in the world, Ibe," Ash informed him. "Obviously a mere photo wouldn't be able to capture her beauty, no matter how great Eiji's skills are."

Eiji smiled at his husband. "I can't exactly disagree..."

 

Most of the night was spent catching up with Ibe. He didn't have a lot of news, other than that he now had a girlfriend who he'd been dating for a few months. Ash wasn't really interested in what Max's friends had to say, and they were playing poker for a lot of the evening, so they kept to themselves anyway. Nadia looked after Aurora for them (which Aurora seemed happy about) with the help of Michael (Ash kept glancing over at him whenever he heard Michael talk, as he didn't trust him with Aurora -- even though he knew Michael wouldn't do anything to hurt her).

 

Dinner was, much to the amusement of Ash and Eiji, lasagna. After hearing people close to them say it several times, Ash leant over to Eiji and whispered, very quietly, "Maybe we should change it to something else." Eiji nodded in embarrassment.

"What're you two whisperin' about?" Max grinned at them.

"Nothin'," Ash replied, taking a bite of his lasagna. "Just telling Eiji a joke I shouldn't be repeating in polite company, that's all."

"A-Ash!" Eiji spluttered. Ash knew the whole table was looking at them, but he didn't care.

"Not exactly polite company here, son," Rogers laughed.

Ash's retort had backfired on him. He had to come up with something, he didn't exactly want to explain why they found lasagna funny. "It'll make your dinner come back up," he shrugged. "It'd be a waste of food."

"Alright, you win," Max sighed with a chuckle. "Leave 'em alone, Rogers."

 

Aurora fell asleep not too long after everyone had finished eating (she'd been allowed some broccoli, but lasagna was far too adventurous for her), so Ash and Eiji decided it would be a good idea to head back home.

"She's lovely," Nadia said softly as she handed their daughter back to Ash. "I'm so glad everything's worked out for you two."

"It's all thanks to you, Nadia," Ash said. "You've given us so much."

Eiji nodded in agreement. "We'll never be able to repay you..."

"You will," Nadia smiled. "So long as you're all happy and healthy, that's enough for me. I would do anything for the both of you, just as my brother did."

"...Thank you, Nadia," Ash whispered, feeling himself tear up. "We'll give her the best life possible, I promise."

"I'm sure you will," Nadia said. "Take care, you two. I hope the new year is full of even more joy and love for you."

"You too, Nadia," Eiji said as he put his coat back on. "Happy New Year."

Nadia replied in Chinese. "Happy New Year to all of you," she added.

 

* * *

 

Aurora briefly woke up when they got home, so they changed her before putting her to bed. She stared up at them as they watched her in her crib.

"Did you have a good year, Aarin?" Eiji asked her.

"I hope she did," Ash laughed. " _We_ certainly did," he added. "And you know what, Aurora?" He gently stroked her cheek. "It's because you were born."

"That's right," Eiji smiled. "This is the best year of my life. You've enriched us beyond what we could've imagined. We love you, Aurora."

Aurora made a sleepy noise at them. They both chuckled quietly.

"You'll understand one day," Ash told her.

She soon drifted off into a peaceful slumber. Her parents didn't take too long to do the same, although the three of them were woken up by the midnight fireworks. Thankfully, Aurora wasn't too unsettled by them, and Ash and Eiji were too tired to stay awake beyond wishing each other a happy New Year and exchanging a kiss before falling back asleep after the noise had died down.

 

If the new year was even as half as incredible as this one had been, it would be more than enough, Ash thought, as he was being lovingly embraced by his perfectly amazing and wonderful husband.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Robert's name is Steven in the manga. I don't know why they changed it but they did. Nobody cares about those dudes anyway though.


	10. I've Heard All About You!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Eiji insists he doesn't mind taking care of Aurora while Ash is at work, but Ash has his doubts (but Ash is silly). The two of them go on a Valentine's movie date and run in to one of Ash's students, and Eiji learns that Ash has been telling them all about him. 
> 
> The months tick by and Aurora keeps growing and learning new skills (like crawling and understanding the word 'No'). Ash is dumbfounded when Eiji informs him that it's Aurora's birthday in less than a month.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oh, uh, oops. Hi. I've had this chapter sitting unfinished for a little bit, but I've been spending my time watching ancient Chinese gays and haven't had the energy to write >_>. 
> 
> Anyway, y'all might've noticed that this is listed as being 15 chapters long. I've come up with a rough outline for what I want to do with Aurora's character, and to stop things from getting too long, I'll be splitting it into parts. I have ideas for things to write up until she's an adult (including her finding out about Ash's past and Banana Fish itself) but since I have no idea if people are interested enough, the first part will only cover up until she starts elementary school.

Ash being home meant that he was able to take care of Aurora while Eiji went out on shopping trips that were too long for their daughter to handle. He wasn't super keen on being left alone, but Eiji kept reassuring him that everything would be fine and that Aurora wasn't actually that complicated -- she mostly just slept.

 

He was watching her shaking her rattle on one such day when it was just the two of them in their apartment.

 

"You're lucky you're so easily entertained," Ash said to her with a chuckle. "This will seem boring to you one day."

Aurora blinked at him and stopped shaking her rattle for a second, but then turned her attention away and resumed playing. She seemed to enjoy making noise, and they'd bought her a couple of other noise-producing toys but nothing too complex. Ash had mentioned to Eiji that they should get her a xylophone when she's old enough, and Eiji, whose English was almost at the level where you couldn't tell he was a foreigner, struggled to repeat the word back to him. Ash had just shrugged and said he found it cute.

 

Ash's least favourite task was probably changing Aurora's diaper, because he usually ended up covered in _something_ , and Aurora appeared to delight in being as uncooperative as she was able to, which meant it always took longer than needed. The one upside was that she laughed for most of the time, and her laughter was adorable, so in the end Ash wasn't _really_ that bothered by it.

 

Ash only had a week after New Year's before going back to work, so he was determined to make the most of it. Aurora, as Eiji had told him, wasn't all that hard to look after, but Ash was glad that he was finally able to help Eiji take care of her. He knew Eiji was tired, and this was confirmed to him when he came home from the store (Eiji had sent him to buy a few scattered ingredients for spaghetti Bolognese) and found that Eiji had fallen asleep holding Aurora while they'd been sitting on the sofa. They both looked _so_ peaceful and, to Ash at least, extremely precious -- he felt privileged to be allowed to see such a sight.

 

After snapping a quick photo of the two angels ( _his_ angels) on his phone, he tiptoed over to the kitchen and began putting away the groceries.

 

To even be able to have a single day like this, full of nothing but love and happiness, still felt like a miracle to him. And he'd been blessed with experiencing an endless number of those days since Aurora had been born. Sure, it was stressful at times and sure, he would rather not be at work all the time, but in the grand scheme of things it was truly blissful. Eiji had given him this life, and even now he asked for nothing in return, other than that Ash let himself be happy. Which Ash was, very slowly, allowing himself to be.

 

Eiji came into the kitchen while Ash was getting himself a soda from the fridge.

 

"I've put her to bed," Eiji said as he gave Ash a kiss on the cheek. "She must've been playing too much."

"I guess you were as well, then?" Ash smirked, kissing Eiji back. Eiji blushed.

"I-I think it's just from having the radiator on," Eiji said. "I've turned it down now that she's not in there..."

"Eiji," Ash sighed, "You're doing too much. I've really noticed it since being home, and... I think you need a break."

"I-I'm fine!" Eiji insisted, also getting a soda. "Yeah, it's tiring, but it's worth it. She's worth all my energy, Ash, and so are you. I have nothing to complain about, okay?"

"Yeah, but--"

"No buts," Eiji cut him off, giving him a proper kiss on the lips this time. "And don't think you're not being helpful, because you are. You being at work is what's making this possible. You work even harder than I do, Ash. I enjoy waking up together with you every morning. It's fun making you your meals. I... like talking to you when you get home from work, and cuddling with you in bed every night is something that makes me really happy. And... I enjoy everything in between, too."

 

Ash put down his soda on the counter top and pulled Eiji into a hug. "Just..." he said quietly. "Just don't overwork yourself. Tell me if things are getting to be too much for you. I can take some more time off work, or something. Promise me you'll let me know, Eiji."

"Of course," Eiji replied softly. "I'm not hiding anything from you, Ash."

"...I know."

 

They stayed like that for a while until Aurora's cries prompted them to tend to her.

 

* * *

 

It was now February. Aurora had learnt how to sit up without any support. She still hadn't started to crawl yet, although she kept trying to, according to Eiji. He'd now also definitely heard her say 'Dada' again amongst her constant babbling.

 

One lunch break, Ash was talking to one of his colleagues in the staff room.

 

"Say," she said, "Do you and your husband ever do things for Valentine's?"

 

Ash had never given a shit about Valentine's, it was a stupid commercial holiday to him. That is, until he and Eiji had started dating. Apparently it was a really big deal in Japan, up to the point where traditionally it was that women gave men gifts on Valentine's Day, and the men returned the favours on White Day a month later (Ash had asked if the 'White' in the name was a reference to the hopes that the person you were giving something back to would be covered in white... Eiji hadn't understood the joke, and when Ash had explained it, Eiji hadn't talked to him for the rest of the afternoon). Eiji usually surprised Ash with chocolates or a fancy dinner date, and Ash tended to repay him either on the day or the day afterwards.

 

"Uh... most of the time, yeah," Ash replied. "Why?"

"Just curious," she smiled. "He's Japanese, right? I wasn't sure if he'd be into it."

Ash laughed. "He cares more about the damn thing than I do. Not sure what we'll do this year, though," he added.

"Can't you find someone to look after your daughter?" his colleague asked.

Ash still didn't trust anyone other than Eiji with looking after Aurora. Well, there _was_ Sing, who was currently around, but did he _really_ know how to take care of a baby? "Yeah, we've got a friend who'll watch her for us. But... we haven't left her with anyone else before, so..."

"This is a good opportunity, then!" she said. "You two should go and have fun for a few hours. I'm sure your daughter will be fine."

Ash barely knew this woman, and had no idea why she was being so encouraging when she didn't know anything about how his and Eiji's relationship worked. "I'll ask him," Ash said. "See if there's a movie he wants to go and see or something..."

The woman nodded. "A movie's always good!"

 

Ash brought it up to Eiji that night. Eiji seemed to agree that they should do something, and after thinking about it more, Ash realised it was a good chance for Eiji to relax for a while. They made plans for Eiji to call Sing in the morning and Eiji said that he'd look up and see which movies were currently showing.

 

Valentine's Day itself was on a Thursday, so they'd given Sing an option of either Saturday or Sunday depending on his availability. Sing picked Saturday, and Ash spent all of the week looking forward to going on a date with Eiji -- which was something he normally didn't get excited about.

 

The movie Eiji had chosen was a story about the struggles of a gay couple (which was supposedly based on a true story, but Ash always doubted those claims) that had apparently gotten a lot of good reviews. Eiji made sure to partake in the great American tradition of ordering a large soda and an oversized bag of popcorn beforehand. Ash just went with a soda, he wasn't a fan of popcorn. They sat near the back of the theatre, which was rather crowded (presumably other couples had the same idea as them). Ash found his hand being held by Eiji's, their fingers intertwined. Ash helped himself to some of Eiji's popcorn as the movie started.

 

As the lights turned on once the credits started rolling, Ash looked over at Eiji, who had been crying quietly since about the halfway point in the story. Ash laughed and used his sleeve to gently dab at Eiji's face.

 

"I don't get it," Ash said. "It's a happy ending, why're you _still_ crying?"

"Be-Because," Eiji choked, "I'm glad they overcame everything and were able to be together..."

"What, do you get like that thinking about us?" Ash couldn't help but ask.

"Of course I do," Eiji replied, smiling at him. "Whenever I think about what you've been through... and how far you've come... I get filled with so much love. I'm proud of you and everything you've been able to accomplish."

Ash felt a lump form in his throat. He wasn't about to get emotional in a movie theatre, dammit. "A-Anyway," he said, standing up, "Let's get going."

 

"You wanna get lunch somewhere?" Eiji asked once they were back on the street after a short bathroom break.

"...Really? Even after all that popcorn?" Ash was slightly impressed.

"Popcorn isn't really food," Eiji protested jokingly. "But if you've had enough, we can go home..."

"I didn't mean it like that," Ash sighed. "What do you feel like?"

 

They spent a few minutes looking around before Eiji decided he felt like some pancakes. To this day, Ash didn't understand how Eiji's stomach worked at all. He seemed to get weird cravings for things sometimes.

 

Ash was hungry by this point himself too, so he decided to have a couple of waffles (he preferred them over pancakes).

 

While they were eating, Ash heard someone call out to him.

 

"Professor Callenreese?"

Ash turned around. It was one of his students, whose name he couldn't remember. "Oh," he said. "Hi. Er..."

"Andrea," she replied cheerfully. "Don't worry about it, you have a lot of students!" She paused before continuing, "Sorry for interrupting, I was just surprised to run into you!"

"It's cool," Ash said. "I don't really mind." He didn't, much. He hadn't expected any of his students to bother, but did make him wonder if she needed something from him. A favour, maybe?

"And you must be the professor's husband?" she nodded at Eiji.

"Oh, uh, yes," Eiji mumbled, confused.

"I've heard all about you!" Andrea said happily.

Eiji blushed slightly. "W-What do you mean by that?" he asked.

"Professor Callenreese tells us stories about you all the time!" Andrea replied. Ash wanted to slide under the table and disappear.

Eiji narrowed his eyes. "What... kinds of stories?"

Andrea giggled. "Stories about how amazing and perfect and kind and wonderful and thoughtful and supportive and handsome you are."

Ash could tell Eiji was staring at him. He chose to look down at his half-eaten waffles instead.

"A-Ash!" Eiji spluttered. "You can't go telling people things like that!"

Annoyed, Ash looked up at him. Eiji was, predictably, blushing intensely. "Why _not_?" he demanded. "It's not like I share anything personal."

"Because the one who's amazing and perfect and kind and wonderful and thoughtful and supportive and handsome is _you_!" Eiji blurted out in a completely serious tone. Ash had no idea how to respond.

Andrea started laughing before quickly stopping herself. "Sorry!" she apologised. "He really is just like you said he was, Professor!"

"Of course he is," Ash huffed. "I wouldn't lie. Especially not about Eiji." He had no reason to do that, after all.

"Oh, yeah," Andrea added, "How's your daughter doing?"

"She's great, thank you," Eiji replied. "We've left her in the care of a friend of ours -- this is actually the first time she hasn't been with either of us..." Ash wanted to remind Eiji that Aurora had, in fact, spent a day in hospital without them, but he knew that didn't really count.

"That's good to hear," Andrea said. "She sounds lovely."

"As I've said," Ash sighed, "She's an angel. I never would've thought there'd be someone in this world who'd be even more of an angel than Eiji, but Aurora definitely is." He raised his eyebrows sarcastically at Eiji, who pulled a face.

"What, because she doesn't boss you around and make you do housework?" Eiji remarked.

"Actually," Ash pointed out, "She bosses me around more than you do."

"Babies seem tricky," Andrea commented. "Anyway," she added, "I'll be on my way. Good luck with everything, Professor Callenreese!"

"T-Thanks..." Ash muttered as Andrea smiled and walked off.

 

"I can't _believe_ you!" Eiji whispered exasperatedly. "How much do you talk about me and Aurora?!"

"I didn't think it was _that_ much," Ash insisted. "Young people are curious, though, sometimes they ask... I really don't tell them much, though."

"Hmmm. If you say so."

 

They finished eating and made their way back home. Ash was looking forward to seeing Aurora again, even if, surprisingly, he hadn't been too worried about her during most of their outing. He was pleased they could, at the very least, trust Sing with watching her, if he was around to do so.

 

Sing was tapping away on his phone when Ash and Eiji arrived back home. He informed them that he'd just put her to bed for a nap and that she'd been fed and changed beforehand. Apparently she was well-behaved while her parents were out, except for a brief period where she cried just after they'd left, but she hadn't taken very long to settle down again. Sing asked them how their date had gone, and they both said they'd had a good time (Sing was glad to hear this). They thanked him as he left, and Sing told them he'd happily help out in any way he could when available.

 

"What do you want to do until Aurora wakes up?" Eiji asked Ash, giving his husband a soft kiss.

"Dunno," Ash replied. "I'm not gonna be hungry enough to eat for ages, and it's too early to shower, so... You wanna just relax for a bit?"

"Sure," Eiji said. "I have some photos I want to sort through, so maybe I'll do that... Unless you wanted to do something together."

Ash kissed Eiji back. "Nah," he said, "I'm good. We can always do things together, uh, later."

Eiji chuckled. "You're right. We have all the time in the world."

 

* * *

 

The weather gradually grew warmer. March saw Aurora start crawling properly, which meant she kept trying to get into things. Ash heard her say 'Dada' again (while Eiji was out of the room, annoyingly), and she was babbling away at them whenever they said something to her. She had begun to point at objects she wanted her parents to retrieve for her, and appeared to crawl over to them when they called out to her while she wasn't looking. Spring break came and went, although Ash and Eiji did manage to squeeze in a date alone together (Sing offered to help them again), this time going to an art gallery that was hosting an exhibition Eiji had wanted to see.

 

Aurora had learnt how to address her parents by the end of April and understood the word 'No' (not that Ash had to tell her that very often). They'd purchased more sophisticated toys for her to enhance her skills, and were trying to make an effort to read to her before bedtime (and nap time during the day). She was starting to stand by herself now, too, but couldn't walk yet. From what Eiji had read, that wouldn't be too far off.

 

"Hey, Ash?" Eiji began one night as they were cuddled in bed. What could he possibly be asking about _this_ time?

"Yeah?" Ash murmured.

"I don't want to alarm you... But Aurora's birthday is next month."

 

Ash sat up and started at him. Surely that wasn't right. "W-What?"

Eiji laughed. "I know," he said. "I can't believe it either. But yeah, she'll be a year old. What d'you think we should do to celebrate?"

"I dunno," Ash replied, lying back down. "I mean, she's not going to care either way, but maybe we should invite some people 'round. At least Nadia and Charlie, and Sing. And maybe Max's family..."

"I was thinking the same thing," Eiji said, running his fingers gently through Ash's hair. Ash liked it when Eiji did that. "What day does summer break start?"

"Sometime late May," Ash answered. "Can't remember when. I think it's after her birthday, though."

"Oh well," Eiji said. "We can do something anyway."

 

Ash had completely lost track of time. How the fuck had Aurora existed for almost a _year_? Had he really been given so much happiness in the space of only eleven months? It still seemed unreal if he thought about it for too long, but he had, recently, realised that this was, indeed, his life. His amazing, peaceful, love-filled life.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> PS Lan WangJi is the best ancient Chinese gay but I also want to give Jiang Cheng a million hugs.


	11. Go Have Some Fun

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It's Aurora's birthday! Her parents throw her a party even though she doesn't get the idea. She has fun anyway.
> 
> Ash is getting stressed with end-of-year workloads, and Eiji is pretty tired too. Sing is the only sensible one around, so he suggests they take a vacation together. Ash remembers it's their tenth anniversary in June, and Sing convinces them that it's the perfect opportunity to do something.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Slightly longer chapter this time! Yay? Oops? One or the other, lol.
> 
> They're both okay, they're just a couple of stressed dads.

Despite being busy with finals, Ash spent his time helping Eiji plan for Aurora's birthday. Sing, unfortunately, was currently overseas, so he couldn't attend, but everyone else they'd invited said they'd come over for the day. Eiji had offered to cook the lunch (which was to be several different kinds of Japanese dishes), so Ash reluctantly helped out by getting their apartment clean. When they had the time, they both went shopping for supplies for the party (and bought Aurora her presents). Everything was going smoothly.

 

Aurora's birthday fell on a Thursday, and they'd arranged the party to be held on the Sunday. On the actual day, they sang Aurora happy birthday (Ash was forced to), gave her her presents (which included a rubber duck for bath time, a xylophone (as they'd previously discussed) and a teddy bear) and Eiji made her favourite food for dinner -- okayu (a Japanese version of rice congee). They'd also recently discovered that she enjoyed natto, much to the delight of Eiji (and to the extreme annoyance of Ash, who still despised the dish), so she'd had a good helping of that for breakfast.

 

They hadn't gone out for dinner as Ash was too tired, and it was rather late by the time he got home from work, anyway (at least in terms of Aurora's schedule), so they were both content with having a good time at home together. This was, after all, about Aurora, not about them. Ash was very much looking forward to summer break, which was still two weeks away -- he needed a rest. He was finding it hard to keep up with Aurora during the evenings, but he didn't want Eiji to worry about him, so he acted like everything was fine. For the most part, it was, and he knew it was just temporary.

 

* * *

 

The party started at roughly noon, give or take half an hour as people pleased. Calling it a 'party' was perhaps a bit of an exaggeration, as it was more of just a gathering, but Ash and Eiji both wanted to show off their adorable daughter to everyone.

 

Nadia and Charlie were the first guests to arrive (Charlie was carrying what looked to be far too many presents). Ash apologised for not having seen them in over a month, but both of them understood that Ash was busy and told him not to worry about it.

 

Aurora happily greeted them, trying and failing to walk over to them (she was now able to walk if she was holding on to something, but could only stand still if unaided), so she chose to crawl over instead. Nadia picked Aurora up in her arms.

 

"You've certainly grown," Nadia commented with a laugh. "And I see you're almost walking!"

"Bah!" Aurora playfully hit Nadia's chest -- she did that sometimes, but Ash and Eiji had been trying to teach her to stop. Aurora, of course, didn't exactly understand, and while it didn't _really_ hurt, it wasn't exactly something they wanted to encourage.

"Aurora," Ash said sternly, causing Aurora to look at him. "No." Aurora frowned at him, maybe partially out of confusion.

Nadia laughed again. "It's okay," she said softly. "Shorter used to do similar things when we were growing up. I don't mind."

 

The mention of Shorter's name left Ash feeling odd, hearing it said so casually like that. It's not as if Ash didn't want to talk about Shorter, but he and Eiji hardly mentioned him (at least not by name) -- it was a reminder that he was no longer here with them.

 

Ash's thoughts were interrupted by Eiji entering the room and asking Ash if he could help set the table. He'd planned to have it all ready before anyone arrived, but he'd gotten sidetracked earlier while trying to get Aurora into her dress (which was a light blue with a slightly darker ribbon on the back).

 

"Oh, er... sorry," Eiji said sheepishly to Nadia and Charlie. "It shouldn't take too long, would you mind watching her for a moment?"

"Of course not," Nadia replied. "That's what we're here for."

"I'll fetch you some drinks," Eiji added. "Um... Feel free to make yourselves at home." He nodded at them and headed back to the kitchen. Ash followed him.

Eiji instructed Ash on laying out the dishes properly while he poured their guests their drinks. Ash thought Eiji had overdone it, especially considering that Aurora wasn't going to even remember any of it. Their somewhat small dining table could barely fit all the food along with the plates and cutlery (partygoers had the option to choose between chopsticks and western cutlery -- Nadia and Charlie would be accustomed to chopsticks, but Max's family probably had no idea how to use them... although the idea of Max getting frustrated at failing to utilise his chopsticks correctly _was_ amusing, Ash didn't want to piss off Jessica too much, and he liked Michael too much to involve him in any potential shenanigans).

 

Once everything was in order, Ash and Eiji joined the others in the living room. Aurora was excitedly showing off her xylophone to Nadia, trying to explain it in that baby babble of hers.

 

Eiji had had his camera out for most of the day, and had been periodically taking photos of Aurora doing things. He'd taken some on her actual birthday as well (including another family photo -- this time with Aurora looking properly at the camera. Ash had suggested making this a tradition, which Eiji had enthusiastically agreed with), and Aurora didn't seem to care about having a strange object shoved in her face from time to time.

 

A few minutes or so later, their doorbell rang. Eiji went and answered it, inviting Max's family inside.

 

"Whoa," Michael exclaimed upon seeing Aurora. "She's changed so much since I last saw her!"

"Babies do that," Jessica remarked. "They can be completely different even after just a few days."

Michael watched Aurora as she looked around at the new arrivals. The last time he'd seen her had been at their New Year's Eve party four months ago. Ash figured Michael was interested, so he said, "You could _try_ picking her up, but she protests quite a bit now."

"N-No thanks," Michael said with a nervous laugh, sitting down in an armchair. "I'm good."

"I'll take you up on the challenge, though!" Max grinned, bending down and gently picking Aurora up. She looked somewhat ridiculous being held by a larger man. "Hey, look at that," he said. "You're not cryin' this time!"

Everyone laughed at that comment. Aurora didn't _always_ cry when Max held her, but she seemed to be less keen on him than anyone else she knew. Ash mocked Max about it every time it happened. Aurora made a couple of noises before taking the hand she was still holding her xylophone mallet in and whacking Max on the nose with it. Eiji instantly went to scold her and take her mallet away while Ash just cackled loudly.

"Ouch!" Max yelled, handing Aurora to Eiji and rubbing his nose. "That hurt!"

"You're lucky," Jessica chuckled. Aurora looked up at her. "Sometimes _I_ wish I could do that, but _unfortunately_ I can't get away with it."

"Aw, c'mon, Jessica!" Max whined, half-jokingly. "You wouldn't hit me with a mallet!"

"No," Jessica said, "But sometimes I feel like it."

"A-Anyway," Eiji interrupted, trying to diffuse the situation, "Since everyone's here now, why don't we eat? We'll open presents later." He mostly addressed the last sentence to Aurora.

They all mumbled in agreement as Eiji lead them over to the kitchen.

 

Eiji's cooking was, as always, delicious. Everyone had many options to choose from, even Aurora, who sat in her highchair, happily devouring whatever was put in front of her.

 

Surprisingly, most of the food was gone by the time everyone had finished eating. The good thing about Japanese cooking was that most things could be used as leftovers the next day, and Eiji had suggested that they have a hotpot dinner tomorrow consisting of what they could salvage. The bad thing about Japanese cooking and everything being on individual plates was that a lot of dish washing was required afterwards, but they'd worry about that after their guests had left.

 

Next up was opening Aurora's presents. Ash helped her unwrap them (as in tear off the wrapping paper without any amount of care), starting with Max's family's gifts. They'd bought her a pull-along alligator toy, a couple of books, a set of building blocks with letters of the alphabet on them and a plastic dinner set covered in drawings of cute cartoon animals. She seemed rather interested in the building blocks (Ash and Eiji had been meaning to buy her something like them, but hadn't gotten around to it).

 

Nadia and Charlie had given Aurora a light-pink headband with a bow in the centre, a pair of baby shoes that were made to look like cats, a set of animal-shaped bath toys... and a quilt.

 

The quilt featured many different colours and patterns, some panels embroidered with Chinese characters that Ash couldn't read. At the top, _Aurora_ was written in a bright green, surrounded by a dark red that bordered the whole quilt.

 

"N-Nadia," Eiji said breathlessly. "This..." Ash was also extremely bewildered.

Nadia smiled at them. "Charlie helped," she said.

Charlie scoffed. "Yeah, right," he said. "More like I helped you choose the colors and panel placement. You did all the work." He gave Nadia a pat on the shoulder.

"This is amazing," Eiji said quietly. "Thank you, Nadia..."

"It really is..." Ash nodded in agreement. He wanted to ask how long it had taken her, but part of him didn't want to know that, either, so he just thanked her instead.

"I know it's going to be summer soon," Nadia said, "But the nights can still be cold, sometimes. So hopefully it keeps your little angel nice and warm." She looked down at Aurora, smiling warmly.

"I'm sure it will," Eiji replied.

"Oh, yes," Nadia continued, "As for the writing..." She pointed to one of the panels. "This one is 'Aurora'. I translated it as best I could." She pointed to another panel. "This means 'joy', in the hopes that she will bring you nothing but joy and happiness." Nadia pointed to yet another panel. "And this one means 'good luck', wishing for her life to be free of ill-fortune."

 

Predictably, Eiji had started to tear up hearing Nadia's explanations. Aurora appeared to notice this, as she crawled over to him. "Dada?"

Eiji chuckled and gently stroked Aurora's hair. "I'm okay," he said. Aurora seemed to believe him and happily sat on his lap.

"Want me to take a photo?" Ash asked jokingly. If it had been him getting emotional, Eiji wouldn't have hesitated to snap a picture.

Eiji laughed again. "Do you even know how to operate that camera?" he teased, knowing full-well that Ash didn't have a clue.

Ash pulled his phone out of his pocket instead. "Who said I was gonna use the camera?" he grinned.

 

They arranged the presents as neatly as they could. Jessica brought up the idea of maybe taking a group photo instead, with the Callenreeses in the centre. They opted to do that, as it would make a nice memory. While Eiji was setting up the tripod, Aurora was starting to fall asleep in Ash's arms. She'd been doing a lot today, after all, so he couldn't blame her.

 

"Aurora," Ash whispered, prompting his daughter to look up at him. "You'll be able to sleep soon. Dad's just gonna take a photo of everyone, okay?" He knew she wouldn't understand, but he liked explaining what was going on to her anyway.

 

Aurora, however, failed to stay awake and had dozed off by the time Eiji was ready. Not that it mattered too much, the idea was the important part. And, as Max pointed out, her being asleep showed that she'd had a good time and had passed out at the end of the party. Ash agreed with him.

 

After the photo was taken, their guests went to leave. Nadia, however, offered to stay and help them with the dishes. She said that, as someone who worked in a restaurant, she knew exactly how much work it could be. Ash and Eiji reluctantly took her up on the offer, and Charlie said he'd be back to drive her home later. Ash still couldn't believe how nice she was.

 

* * *

 

Work was starting to take its toll on Ash, and he found himself getting snappy at Eiji more often than he wanted to (ie at all), but he didn't want to admit to Eiji that he was struggling. He only had just over a week before summer break began, and he was counting down the days until he'd be able to focus on his family again. Eiji, seemingly, hadn't realised Ash's current state, as he hadn't said anything about it. It was slightly odd, Ash thought, because Eiji usually noticed when Ash was beginning to descend into a downwards spiral.

 

Sing came to visit a few nights before Ash's holiday started (he'd just come back from Hong Kong and wanted to give Aurora a belated birthday present -- and give Ash and Eiji a couple of souvenirs) and picked up on the situation instantly.

 

Sing had been playing with Aurora, who had fallen asleep after some intense block-building (which consisted of her showing Sing precisely how to stack the blocks in the order she'd invented). After Eiji placed her in bed, Sing spoke up.

 

"Guys," he said slowly. Ash and Eiji both looked at him, confused. "You both seem, like, _super_ tired."

"That's not true," Ash said. It was a lie, of course. "I'm just busy with work since it's the end of the year, and--"

"I _thought_ you were tired!" Eiji sighed. "I didn't want to say anything in case it upset you, but... You've been going to bed really early, and I noticed you haven't been playing with Aarin as much this week..."

Ash swallowed nervously. "I-I didn't want to get in the way!" he explained. "She's wanting to play by herself more and more lately, so I--"

"Alright, alright, you two," Sing said firmly, causing both Ash and Eiji to stop. "I didn't mean to start an argument. I'm just worried about you guys."

Ash took a deep breath. "Sorry, Eiji," he apologised.

Eiji shook his head. "I'm sorry too, Ash," he said. "I wasn't trying to be angry."

"...I know," Ash mumbled quietly.

 

They sat in an awkward silence before Sing pressed on. "Both of you deserve a break, don't you think?"

A break? "What do you mean?" Eiji asked before Ash could get there.

"I mean, like," Sing said, "You guys haven't had any time to yourselves for ages -- and no, Valentine's doesn't really count. I've got some free time for a while, so..." he took a deep breath before continuing, "What about a vacation for a few days?"

"Aurora's too young to travel with!" Ash protested. He hated the sound of crying babies in airports and refused to contribute to that awful phenomenon.

"Are you listening to me?" Sing frowned. "You wouldn't be taking her with you."

"But then," Eiji said, "What would we do with her?"

Sing groaned, throwing his head back. " _Honestly_..." He sat back up and glared at them. "I'm saying I'll look after her for you. And you won't have to worry about anyone causing trouble, _he's_ not here right now."

"Didn't he come back with you?" Ash asked, even if he didn't care where Yut Lung was or what he was doing.

"He did," Sing answered, "But he's on vacation at the moment himself, as it happens. Spending some quality time relaxing in the Caribbean." He smirked and raised a knowing eyebrow at Ash. Well, Blanca definitely knew about Aurora now, if he hadn't already been informed. Not that it mattered. "Anyway," Sing added, "What do you say? You won't have to worry about anything, and you'll have a few days alone with each other. Stay at a resort somewhere or something, relax for a bit."

 

Silence fell again as they thought it over. Ash definitely needed a break, and Eiji probably did, too. Aurora was certainly old enough to be left alone for a few days now, and she knew and liked Sing. And Sing would be able to contact them if anything happened, and Nadia and Charlie would help him if he needed something...

 

It was tempting.

 

"Where d'you want to go?" Ash asked Eiji.

"Hmm..." Eiji replied. "I'm not sure. Nothing immediately comes to mind."

"How about Miami?" Sing suggested. "You can stay at a beach resort there. Go have some fun."

"Miami sounds good!" Eiji said, nodding.

"Any objections, Ash?" Sing asked.

"Nope," Ash replied. "Miami it is, I guess."

"Awesome," Sing grinned, looking relieved. "I'll book travel and shit, that way it's not a hassle for you two."

"We can take care of that," Ash protested, not wanting to be _that_ indebted to Sing.

Sing shrugged. "I'm used to it," he said. "I'll have it all done by the time you're off work, Ash."

"T-Thanks, Sing," Ash said with a smile. "We owe you."

"You can repay me by going and having a good time and enjoying yourselves!" Sing said, grinning again. "I want details!" He paused before adding, rather cheekily, "Although, maybe not _too_ many details..."

The three of them laughed, careful to keep their voices down so they wouldn't wake Aurora.

 

"Shit." Ash had realised something.

"W-What's wrong? Eiji asked, concerned.

"It's our anniversary next month..." Ash said slowly. "Our... _tenth_ anniversary."

"It's perfect timing, then," Sing laughed. "Now you guys have no reason to say no to me!"

Ash and Eiji glanced at each other. Had it really been ten whole years since they'd started this amazing relationship? And, more importantly, had it really been _fifteen_ whole years since they'd met?

 

* * *

 

Ash and Eiji had a wonderful time in Miami, taking their vacation only a few days after Ash finished work. They did indeed stay at a beach resort and enjoyed activities such as windsurfing, para-gliding and general sightseeing, visiting the aquarium... and the World Erotic Art Museum (Ash practically had to drag Eiji inside, but Eiji wound up being fascinated by the end of it). They also spent a lot of time just relaxing in their hotel room, with Eiji constantly worrying that they were disturbing the people in the rooms next to them (Ash didn't give a shit, this was self-care for the both of them).

 

On the day of their anniversary, they ate at a very overpriced restaurant (it was worth it) and _definitely_ disturbed their neighbours that night. As they lay peacefully in bed together, Eiji gently kissed Ash's neck.

 

"I can't believe it's already been fifteen years," Eiji murmured. "It feels like it was only yesterday, yet I also feel like I've known you my entire life..."

"Yeah," Ash agreed. "Here's to fifteen more years. At the bare minimum." He chuckled quietly.

"More like fifty more years," Eiji said, correcting him. "We swore we'd spend the rest of our lives together, and neither of us are going anywhere any time soon..."

"Yeah," Ash said again. "We need to be, anyway. For each other... and for Aurora."

"Mmhmm," Eiji mumbled, yawning slightly. "We both have to be the best we can be for her. But," he added, "We should probably sleep now."

"We should. Good night, Eiji. I love you."

"Good night, Aslan. I love you, too."

 

It was definitely what they'd both needed, but they were pleased to be back home at the end and to see Aurora again (she seemed happy to see her parents again, too), and Sing was satisfied with how they were behaving compared to before their well-deserved break. Eiji had taken tons of photos, which he showed to Sing (although he did insist that they weren't just out doing things all day) before Sing left.

 

Ash wondered how the hell they were going to keep Aurora occupied over the summer months, as it was getting increasingly hotter and she was increasingly requiring more hours of complex play time.

 

Luckily they were both at home with her when she took her first steps.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I don't really know what you do in Miami but it's a beach resort-y kind of place from what I could be bothered looking up so uh, sorry if it's inaccurate, lol.
> 
> Sing is a good dude who really cares about his friends. 
> 
> Also self-care is important indeed, even if it is having really loud sex with your husband in a hotel room while on vacation.
> 
> PS Yes, Yut Lung has told Blanca. No, Blanca won't be showing up, he's enjoying the Caribbean too much.


	12. That's My Line

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Summer break continues! Ash and Eiji receive a letter from an old acquaintance and Aurora discovers the fun of public swimming pools -- and crayons. Also, it's Ash's birthday again, and they run into his old gang while they're out for lunch. 
> 
> Once Ash goes back to work, his boss asks him and some of the other faculty to speak at the opening of the academic year. Ash is, for reasons he can't understand, amongst them. Instead of talking about boring academic shit, he gets preachy about love.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This fic is getting away from me and it's gonna be longer than I thought it would be, oops. I'm still gonna... probably be able to get it done in under 20 chapters but we'll see.
> 
> Also I can't write speeches, lol, sorry Ash.

A week or so after Ash and Eiji returned home, they received a letter addressed to both of them with no return address. They both thought it was suspicious on a few accounts (but mostly because who the fuck still sent _letters_ nowadays?), but Eiji convinced Ash to open it in case it was something important.

 

_Dear Ash & Eiji,_

_I am delighted to hear about the birth of your daughter. A very belated congratulations to all!_

_I'm sure the two of you will make excellent parents and I wish you both all the luck in the world._

_With warmest regards,_

_Blanca_

 

_PS Apologies for the late acknowledgement; I have only just been informed of the matter. I do hope this letter reaches you._

 

"...How did he get our address?" Eiji wondered aloud, confused.

Ash scoffed. "Isn't it obvious? He _did_ say he'd tell him." He angrily folded up Blanca's letter. Something about the tone annoyed him. "Also, who the fuck uses a semicolon in something this casual?" he snarled.

Eiji laughed. "Only someone like Blanca."

Ash humphed as he tore up the letter. He felt like he was being... mocked, almost, but that wasn't quite the right word. Condescending? Maybe that was what Blanca's letter came across as. Whatever. He unceremoniously tossed the shredded paper into the garbage can, flipping it off as he did so. _I hope your stupid dick gets burnt off by the stupid Caribbean sun_ , he thought bitterly. "Let's stop talking about Blanca," he said sternly to Eiji. "He's of no concern to us."

"Sure," Eiji replied with a nod, kissing Ash on the cheek.

 

* * *

 

One of the things Ash and Eiji had decided to try was taking Aurora to a local swimming pool now that she'd started walking. She'd always enjoyed her baths, so they hoped it would translate to liking being in water in general. They'd found an appropriate one-piece swimsuit for her that was designed to work with swim diapers.

 

Eiji still had the scars from where he had been shot at, but they were mostly faded by now and could be covered up if he wore his swim trunks high enough (it admittedly looked a bit silly, but it worked). Ash's stab wound, on the other hand, was too far up his stomach, so he opted to wear a tank top whenever he went swimming (Eiji had suggested this to him back when they were in Japan and his scar was more visible -- it made Ash feel more comfortable either way, as he didn't really like wearing very little clothing around strangers).

 

The pool was quite crowded on the day they visited it. There were many people of all different ages, including a lot of small children. Some were being supervised by their parents, others were being watched by older children. It was loud, and one of the first things Ash noticed was the stench of chlorine, but he could put up with it.

 

They'd changed Aurora into her swimsuit before leaving home, and each took turns watching her while the other made use of the changing room. Unfortunately, they'd found, people were still somewhat suspicious when an adult male brought a very young girl with them to a public toilet or changing room (which, Ash had pointed out to people, was completely a double-standard, and surely it would be worse if they left their daughter unsupervised outside for several minutes. Nobody ever had a proper counter-argument, and usually left them alone after that). Granted, there had only been a handful of incidents (and most of them had happened when Eiji was out with Aurora alone, so Ash had only heard about them second-hand), but it still pissed Ash off nonetheless.

 

Aurora had a lot of fun at the pool and seemed to like engaging (as much as she could) with the children around her. Ash and Eiji also had a good time, as both of them were satisfied with watching her do just about anything so long as she was happy. Aurora fell asleep during the car ride home. They both agreed that they'd definitely take her to the pool again soon.

 

* * *

 

By the time it was July, Aurora was getting the hang of walking. Ash and Eiji had bought her a push-along baby walker that supposedly helped children learn to walk. Aurora reacted more to the Fourth of July fireworks than she had last year, becoming very unsettled by the loud noises. It took both her parents distracting her with her pacifier, soft toys and singing (Eiji sang Japanese lullabies to her; Ash attempted to sing the few English lullabies he knew, but he sounded dreadful, so he only sung if Eiji's songs didn't appear to work) to soothe her and calm her down.

 

Eiji now had to be extra careful that Aurora couldn't get her hands on any of his photography equipment, which lived in the guest bedroom that hadn't been remodelled into Aurora's room. They also needed to keep her out of the kitchen whenever it wasn't meal time (as they had several sharp knives and other dangerous objects in the room for cooking). This wasn't the easiest task in the world, as Aurora would follow them if they went to fetch a drink or a snack, eager to know what her parents were doing every moment of the day (the hardest were making sure she didn't follow them into the bathroom or sneak into their bedroom at night).

 

Aurora had also learnt several more words: she now fully understood 'No' (and used it to her advantage), could wave goodbye at guests, happily said 'Doggy' whenever they passed a dog in the street (this slightly worried Ash for reasons he wasn't quite sure of) and now called Nadia 'Nana'. She'd mastered the art of 'Dada', but Ash and Eiji found it hard knowing who she was talking to, so they'd decided that Ash would still be 'Dada' but Eiji would just be 'Eiji' when she was old enough to say his name properly -- it sounded more like 'Ei-i' currently, but Ash was just 'A-u', so it was the more distinguishable of the two. Ash had triple-checked with Eiji to make sure he was okay with it, and Eiji (being Eiji) said he had no complaints.

 

She was also able to drink from a sippy cup independently and they'd manage to identify her favourite foods, which were currently cream stew and grilled cheese. They still gave her baby formula, but were slowly switching to regular milk as Aurora's doctor had advised (she was still up-to-date with all her vaccinations and Ash insisted on taking her for regular checkups just in case there was something they'd missed, even though Eiji told him over and over again that he didn't need to worry about it).

 

Jessica had bought Aurora a set of crayons, as she said Michael had started drawing around this age and she thought it would be good for Aurora's development. Her first 'drawing' was just a bunch of nondescript scribbles, but Ash insisted that she was going to be the next Picasso and he immediately got the artwork framed and hung on the living room wall for all visitors to see. Eiji's only comment was that Aurora already drew better than Ash, and Ash couldn't exactly argue with him on that.

 

* * *

 

August rolled around again, they found themselves celebrating Ash's birthday once more. The Callenreeses went out for a simple lunch again, this time to a dessert parlour (Ash felt like something sweet). While they were sitting outside enjoying their ice cream and sundaes, they were approached by a familiar group.

 

"H-Heya, Boss... Eiji..." It was Alex, Kong and Bones. Ash hadn't seen them since Aurora's baby shower. He'd been so preoccupied with looking after her (and with work) that he realised he hadn't given them any updates.

"Oh, hey, guys," Ash replied. Eiji cheerfully greeted them too, although Aurora seemed skeptical, so Ash turned to her. "These are our friends," he explained. "This is Alex," he said, pointing at Alex. "This is Kong." He pointed at Kong. "And this is Bones." He pointed at Bones.

"Aww," Bones gushed, "She's grown so much! She's real cute, Boss!" He smiled at Aurora, who pulled a face.

"Isn't she adorable?" Ash said proudly. "She can walk now, too!" The three visitors went "Ooooh" in unison.

 

Aurora decided she'd had enough of trying to understand who these strangers were, so she returned to feeding herself. She was pretty good at it, but at least half her food ended up on her face and clothes, and she was still slightly uncoordinated using a spoon and much preferred to use her fingers.

 

"Sorry I haven't been in contact," Ash apologised.

"It's cool, Boss," Alex replied. "We know you've been busy."

"Yeah," Kong agreed. "This little one needs all your attention." The other two nodded.

 

They gave Ash a brief update as to how the gang was doing. The situation seemed stable at the moment, which pleased Ash, even though he was no longer invested in that world. He still did care about his old gang, no matter how much he tried to distance himself from them.

 

"So we can tell the guys that Boss and his family are good, then?" Kong asked, watching Bones make funny faces at Aurora (who appeared to have realised that these weird guys weren't a threat).

 

 _Boss and his family..._ Ash repeated those words a few times in his head. It felt odd hearing it from somebody else, but at the same time, it sounded nice.

 

"Yeah," Ash said. "Also, how many times to have to tell you guys that I'm not your boss anymore? That's Alex." He frowned at them.

"But you'll always be our boss," Bones protested, still playing with Aurora. "Alex is our boss now, but you're our boss, too. Our boss's boss."

Ash laughed loudly. "That doesn't even make sense!" It did make sense, but Ash liked to tease his gang.

"But it does!" Bones insisted, turning to face Ash. "Alex still listens to you."

"I know, I know," Ash said, smiling. "But then..." he added jokingly, "What's Eiji?"

The three looked at each other, trying to come up with an answer. "Eiji is..." Kong said slowly, "Your boss."

"What?" Ash hadn't been expecting that.

"Well," Kong explained, "You listen to him an' he gives you orders an' stuff, right? So he's your boss. Boss's boss's boss."

Ash laughed again. These guys really were idiots, but in a good way. "You're not wrong there," he said. "How about that, Eiji?" he grinned at his husband.

Eiji blushed slightly. "I-It's only logical," he said. "I mean, I _am_ older than you... And to be fair, you _have_ gotten better about listening to me over the years."

Ash humphed exaggeratedly. "That's only because you get annoying if I don't."

"And whose fault is that?" Eiji grinned back, raising an eyebrow.

"So, er," Alex said, "We'll get goin'. See ya 'round, Boss, Eiji." He nodded at them. Kong and Bones also said their farewells, and Aurora managed a shy 'Bye-bye' and a wave (mostly at Bones).

 

Once they were out of earshot, Eiji mentioned something.

"They didn't say anything about your birthday," he pointed out.

Ash swallowed a mouthful of his sundae. "I don't think they know when it is," he admitted, shrugging. They'd always had too many things going on to care about birthdays and the like. Ash wasn't even sure when any of theirs were, or if they even knew their own birthdays, for that matter. "I don't care."

"Fair enough," Eiji replied with a smile.

 

They finished their lunch and went home. Aurora, as she tended to, fell asleep on the way back.

 

For Ash's birthday, Eiji had given him a book voucher and a peridot necklace (he'd explained to Ash that the peridot was August's birthstone, and that it was similar in colour to jade, so he'd thought it would look nice on him). Ash still read a lot, although he hadn't been reading as much for himself since Aurora had been born (not that he minded). He owned an e-reader, but Eiji was still very much a physical media advocate, so he encouraged Ash to buy actual books when he could.

 

However, neither of them had set foot in a public library in thirteen years, and they both subconsciously tended to avoid taking walks near the NYC Public Library, even if they didn't realise they were doing so. All of Aurora's books had been either bought at a book store or given to them.

 

Once Aurora had been put to bed, they made absolutely sure she wasn't going to be able to enter their room that night if she happened to wake up.

 

* * *

 

Ash didn't want to go back to work. He was happier staying at home and looking after Aurora and spending time with Eiji. It was much more fun watching Aurora playing than it was giving lectures, even if he wasn't the biggest fan of visiting the swimming pool, as it had gotten increasingly crowded as summer dragged on. Being around so many people wasn't doing his anxiety any favours, and unsupervised children made things worse. Unfortunately, Aurora loved the pool, so he had to be an adult and put up with it. He'd admitted his concerns to Eiji, who understood, and said that once Ash started working again, he'd take Aurora during the day at least once a week so that Ash wouldn't have to worry about it, one again leaving Ash feeling nothing but gratefulness towards the love of his life.

 

During the first staff briefing of the school year, Ash's boss, Mrs. Jones, said that she wanted a few of the faculty to speak at the opening of the academic year.

 

"It's important to encourage the students," she explained, "Both those returning and those just starting out. I want them to know that those teaching them come from a variety of different backgrounds, and show that it's possible for them to achieve their dreams." She paused before continuing, "I have a list of people I would like to give speeches. However, if you cannot, feel free to discuss that with me afterwards."

 

She named the faculty she had in mind. Ash, for some reason, was on the list. The other professors were all highly accomplished and had actually contributed to society over the years. Ash didn't fit into either of those categories.

 

"Uh, why me?" Ash asked, perplexed.

Mrs. Jones looked at him and sighed. "Because, Professor Callenreese," she said, "You've achieved a lot for someone so young. You can tell them about your life, and the path that led to you becoming a teacher."

 

 _I absolutely fucking cannot_ , Ash wanted to say. Nobody was to know about Ash's past, especially not at the university. Not only did he not want to talk about it because it was difficult to, he would most definitely get fired if they knew what he'd done. If anything, he should be in jail, not teaching impressionable youths. But part of the reason why he wanted to become a professor was to try and keep those impressionable youths on the right track, or at least help them find it if they'd already wandered off.

 

Maybe he could just talk about Eiji for a few minutes or something.

 

Ash reluctantly agreed to speak at the ceremony, but he didn't say anything to Eiji about it, and spent the rest of the day thinking of what he could say.

 

* * *

 

Mrs. Jones's opening year address was, as it always had been, overly long and dry. Ash was sure nobody was actually listening to it, and he couldn't blame them. He'd tried to pay attention in previous years, but he'd given up. Even Eiji's ramblings about megapixels were more interesting to him.

 

The faculty speaking were arranged in alphabetical order by surname, which meant Ash was second. The person who spoke before him was an older man who taught psychology, and had some good points to make about human behaviour and whatnot. Ash had, in the past, found some of his views a bit outdated, but he realised he was probably a bit (as in extremely) biased against old men who were involved with brain-related stuff.

 

When it was Ash's turn, he shuffled over to the podium and placed his cue cards on it. He scanned the audience, which was full of almost every kind of person one could think of. He cleared his throat.

 

"Hi," he began, casually. "I'm Professor Aslan Callenreese, and I teach political science. Unfortunately, all I have is another boring speech to make you all sit through." A wave of laughter spread throughout the crowd. "So, uh, unlike everyone else speaking today, I'm nobody special. Unlike my colleagues, I haven't managed to achieve amazing things, and there's nothing terribly interesting about me, I'm afraid." He paused as he moved his cue cards around. "However, what I will say is this: what I have found over the years is that, no matter who you are, no matter where you come from, no matter what you want to do, or what you want to become, the most important thing in life is love. It's cheesy, I know, but hear me out. I know many of you will have struggled or will be struggling with many things, and some of you will still be trying to find your place in the world. And that's okay. Everyone goes through difficult times in their lives, at different stages."

He shuffled his cue cards again. 

"This is where all that nonsense about love comes in," he continued. "Political science is basically telling you, in many ways, to be nicer to people and to be kind. To yourselves, and to each other. To random strangers. Education does, indeed, make the world a better place, but in my experience, love is what we need in our lives more than anything. Love is what has saved me a countless number of times, and without it, I wouldn't be standing here talking to you. You'd be listening to someone else rambling on at you instead." He paused. "Love is something that can be taught, just like a university class. It's something that, once you gain it, perhaps just like a degree, you want to hold on to and show off to everyone you come across. You want to be like, 'Hey, look! I have this wonderful thing, isn't it great?' and encourage other people to obtain it, too."

 He switched over to his next cue card, which just read _I fucking love Eiji_. "I was taught about the wonders of love by my husband. I owe him more than I can put into words. Meeting him opened up my world, my mind and my heart, and I really do believe that, if other people could experience what he's made me feel, the world would benefit greatly. So if you have chosen to study political science -- and even if you haven't -- I implore you all to understand the influence you have over others, and that, if you ever end up in a position of power, to use it to help people, instead of abusing it. Everyone sitting in front of me has the power to change the world if you set out to do so. Sure, it may just be in very subtle ways, but it's a domino effect, and love does, in the end, make the world go 'round. So study hard, graduate, have fun, and, most importantly, be somebody who can bring out the best qualities in others. Be passionate about what you believe in. Use your knowledge to assist those in need."

It was now the last cue card. All it said on it was _Aurora_ , surrounded by stars and hearts.

"My husband and I have a young daughter. By the time she's old enough to go out into the world, many of you will be the ones making decisions that will influence her. Her generation will either expand upon what you put into play, or they'll forcefully yank it out from under you and make it their own. I want her to live a life where she doesn't have to worry about things, but at the same time, I want her to help people where she can. She's just one example of someone who will grow up watching people like you and the paths you choose to walk. So, please, stay on the right path. Be a good person. Accept those who are different to you. Have faith in yourselves -- you all hold more power than you think you do. Don't waste this chance. The future depends on what you achieve at this university."

Ash mumbled a thank you as he took his cue cards and returned to his seat. He'd probably said too much, but he didn't care about being preachy. He knew how important it was, and he could only hope that at least some of the students had understood what he was on about.

 

Mrs. Jones approached him after the ceremony had ended to tell him that she had thoroughly enjoyed his speech, and that she agreed whole-heartedly with him. She also informed him that all the speeches would be uploaded to the school's website... in case he wanted to show his husband.

 

Ash didn't, particularly, as he knew Eiji would have some constructive criticism about his self-assessment, but once it was posted, he gave the link to Eiji anyway. Eiji, for whatever reason, teared up while watching it, and gave Ash a very tight hug at the end.

 

"I love you, Aslan," Eiji whispered, nuzzling his head against Ash's neck. "I love you I love you I love you I love you."

Ash chuckled quietly and ruffled Eiji's hair. "That's my line, Eiji," he said. "I love you, too."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know three-bedroom apartments cost an arm and a leg in NYC, but it's Ash, lol. He spent a lot of money on it just in case anyone needed to crash there for the night, or if Sing stayed over.
> 
> And yes, Ash has reasons to be worried about his daughter being interested in dogs, but you didn't hear that from me...
> 
> PS This is the most Blanca's going to show up (at least in this part of the story), he's too busy flirting to visit the States.


	13. Be a Good Girl

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Aurora has learnt how to say no to things. She's also learnt how to say several more words, including her own name! Kind of.
> 
> She continues to grow and develop and her parents are finding it hard to keep up. Ash forces himself to tag along when Aurora has her next batch of immunisations just so he can confirm that their doctor does actually think she's fine and Eiji hasn't been lying to him. (He trusts Eiji! He just doesn't trust doctors!)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I have absolutely no knowledge of how anything medical works in the US other than that insurance is a bitch and a half, lol. Sorry if this is completely wrong D:.

One thing Aurora had become very good at was throwing tantrums when things didn't go her way, whether it was her parents not letting her into the cupboard she wanted to inspect or being put to bed earlier than she would've liked. Her crying still made Ash feel extremely unsettled, and every time she wailed about something, he felt extremely guilty and also couldn't help but fear that something was _actually_ wrong and she wasn't just complaining over nothing. Sometimes she got mad when Ash left for work in the morning, but they didn't exactly have a choice about that.

 

Before Aurora had been born, Eiji would drive Ash to and from work (unless he was busy on a photoshoot and couldn't make it), but it was far too much of a hassle getting Aurora ready, so Ash had been taking public transport for the past sixteen months. He wasn't really that keen on it (especially since New York public transport had many issues), but it was the best option, so he put up with it. He'd come close to having breakdowns a couple of times on super crowded trains coming home in the evening, but his therapist had taught him some techniques to help calm himself in such situations that appeared to work -- if he remembered them, that is. His other option was walking home, which he didn't want to do, as they weren't _that_ close to the university he taught at, and he was still worried that somebody, somewhere was out to get him. New York was still a dangerous place, after all, and Ash Lynx was still a well-known name that was only spoken of in hushed whispers amongst the street gangs.

 

Ash had arrived home much later than usual one evening due to a train delay and found that Eiji was struggling to get Aurora to take her bath.

 

"S-Sorry," Eiji apologised, trying to keep ahold of Aurora (who was only wearing her diaper), who was wriggling around in his arms in an attempt to get loose. "I don't know what's wrong, she just -- stay still, Aarin!"

"No!" Aurora shouted, managing to free herself from Eiji's grasp and running behind the sofa. "No!"

 

Ash decided to pretend he didn't know where she was. "Oh dear, Eiji," he said sarcastically. "Where's Aurora gone? I wanted to give her a kiss."

Aurora peeked out from behind the sofa, her face bright upon hearing Ash's voice. "Dada!" she yelled, walking over to Ash with out-stretched arms. Ash laughed as he picked her up.

"Why won't you take your bath, Aurora?" he asked. Aurora stopped smiling, knowing that she was being told off. "It's late, you need to be in bed."

"Dada..." Aurora said again, this time slower.

"What's that?" Ash couldn't quite understand what she was trying to say, although he put that down to him being tired after a long day. He wanted to go straight to bed himself and pass out for the night, but he needed to shower first, and he couldn't do that until after Aurora had been bathed.

"Dada," she repeated, looking as if she was going to start crying.

"Oh!" Eiji exclaimed, his expression relaxing slightly. "Did you not want to take your bath until Dad was home?" he asked softly, bending down so that he was eye-level with Aurora. Aurora nodded and buried her face in Ash's chest.

 

Ash and Eiji smiled at each other. Ash felt a bit stupid for not having figured out something so simple, but at least they'd gotten to the bottom of it.

 

"Will you take your bath now, Aurora?" Eiji asked her.

"Y-Yeah," Aurora said quietly. Ash handed her over to Eiji, but Aurora clung on to his shirt.

"What?" Ash asked, trying his best not to get annoyed at her. Aurora looked up at him, as if she was trying to tell him something. "Oh, yeah," Ash said. "I said I'd kiss you, didn't I?" he chuckled as he planted several kisses on her forehead and cheeks. Aurora giggled with each one.

 

Ash watched as Eiji carried a now-obedient Aurora out of the room. Eiji had probably explained to her that he'd be late home, but she still hadn't wanted to be bathed before she saw him. He was impressed that a child so young cared about things such as routines, and it meant that they'd have to be careful now that they'd realised she was following one.

 

He wasn't particularly hungry, so he just heated up some leftover pasta in the microwave. He was almost done eating when Eiji brought Aurora over to say good night.

 

"You can have your bath even if I'm not home, okay?" Ash told her gently as he kissed her forehead. "Be a good girl and listen to Eiji."

Aurora was now too tired to reply, so she just nodded sleepily at him instead. Ash kissed her again. "Good night, Aurora." Aurora made a non-descript noise.

 

Ash was finished tidying up when Eiji came back. "She's already asleep," he said. It was now Eiji's turn to receive kisses from Ash, but these weren't nearly as gentle. Eiji kissed him back playfully. "We should shower."

"Only if you wash me," Ash replied, yawning. "I'm too tired for much else."

"I know," Eiji said, smiling fondly at him. "I think we're both tired tonight..."

 

They went to sleep earlier than they usually did. Ash struggled to wake up with his alarm the next morning.

 

* * *

 

October was uneventful, save for Aurora discovering that she _really_ liked the taste of pumpkin. Eiji found this hilarious, so he began feeding her pumpkin with her dinner most nights. Ash wasn't amused, although pumpkin wasn't nearly as bad as natto, at least in terms of the smell. Aurora's tastes seemed to be changing every week or so, which meant that they constantly had try different foods to see what she'd eat. Sometimes she'd refuse everything they gave her, only to cry an hour later because she was hungry.

 

Eiji's family had sent over some picture bilingual picture books that featured simple stories in both English and Japanese. Eiji tried to speak to Aurora in Japanese during the day, but it didn't seem to be sticking. He wasn't bothered by it, though, and had told Ash that it was probably because she was still getting the hang of English. Ash agreed with him.

 

Aurora seemed to like music, and would start trying to move along to the rhythms of whichever songs they played for her. Unfortunately, Ash's music tastes weren't exactly appropriate for a child (even though he said to Eiji that not _all_ the songs he listened to contained explicit language and adult subject matters -- just most of them), so they tended to opt for children's music (Ash was very glad he wasn't around when most of it was playing, as he couldn't stand the high-pitched voices and dumbed-down lyrics) or some Japanese songs Eiji knew. While they didn't want to expose her to much television, they did show her educational things occasionally, and she liked watching bright, playful music videos and dance routines, which they figured were harmless enough.

 

Now that Aurora was eighteen months old, she was learning at an incredibly fast rate that her parents couldn't quite keep up with. She was able to say 'Eiji' properly, and also knew how to greet 'Nadi' and 'Sing'. She could also say a couple of two-word phrases, like 'Dada home!' whenever Ash came back from work, could properly say 'Good night' to them. Her vocabulary also included 'Bath', 'Kiss' (she liked demanding kisses from her parents), 'Hug' and, most importantly, 'Aurora'. Kind of. It sounded more like 'Awowa' when she said it, but she was now capable of saying her own name. Her parents encouraged her to introduce herself to people who already knew her, just so she could show off her skills. Everyone seemed to find it adorable, and Aurora responded well to being praised.

 

Eiji's birthday came and went, which they celebrated in their usual fashion of going out for a meal. Ash bought him a few pairs of socks and a beanie, since it was starting to get cold again. Nothing interesting happened at Thanksgiving, either, other than Aurora actually being able to eat the turkey Eiji had cooked this year. She didn't seem to like it much, but she liked mimicking her parents, and that included wanting to eat whatever they were eating. Something she loved imitating was Eiji taking pictures, and she tried making camera noises while pretending to take photos of her parents. They entertained her by posing for photos when she did so, although Ash's involved a lot of silly faces. Eiji said that Aurora was still _far_ too young for an actual camera and would just break any they gave her, but it was extremely endearing nonetheless.

 

Ash decided to force himself to go along for Aurora's next round of immunisations. Even though Eiji had said he shouldn't be worried about anything, he wanted to hear it with his own ears. He trusted Eiji -- he just didn't trust doctors. Or medical professionals of any description.

 

Their doctor echoed exactly what Eiji had previously told him.

 

"But I do understand where you're coming from, Mr. Callenreese," he added, after reassuring Ash that there was nothing wrong with Aurora. "Being a first-time parent is _very_ nerve-wracking."

"You have children, Dr. Jaeger?" Eiji asked. He was holding Aurora, who had endured her shots well but was a little bit unsettled. Ash had had to cover his ears and close his eyes as they happened, and Dr. Jaeger had commented that Aurora was less bothered by it than Ash was, so Eiji had to explain that Ash had reasons for not being comfortable around other people getting injected with needles (Dr. Jaeger had said that it was a common issue... Ash wanted to tell him that his _exact_ reasons weren't common, but he refrained).

"I have two sons," Dr. Jaeger explained in a kind tone. "I was much more worried about what I was doing with my older son than I was with my younger son. The first time things happen, you fret about everything, and worry that the second they get hurt you're going to have to rush them to the ER." He laughed and adjusted his glasses. "My younger son, on the other hand... I wasn't as protective of him, although I'm still not sure if that worked out or not, honestly."

 

"...S-Sorry," Ash mumbled, feeling slightly stupid about what he'd asked.

"Please don't apologise!" Dr. Jaeger said. "You just want to make sure your daughter's healthy and safe. If anything, I'm pleased when parents question things. If you ask me, more of them need to do so. But as I said, Aurora is perfectly fine. She's even meeting several of her milestones early, which is an indication that she's quite smart."

Eiji chuckled quietly. "What's so funny?" Ash asked, frowning.

"I'm sorry," Eiji smiled. "It's just, you know, given how smart _you_ are, Ash, it makes sense that Aurora would be, wouldn't it?"

"You're exaggerating," Ash sighed. "I'm not--"

"Oh come _on_ ," Eiji rolled his eyes. "Don't tell me I'm exaggerating, Mr. IQ-of-One-Hundred-and-Eighty." Ash didn't want to be an asshole and correct him by telling him his IQ was actually over two hundred, as tempting as it was.

"If only you could share some of that intelligence with my younger son!" Dr. Jaeger said with a laugh.

"I'd rather give it to Eiji if anyone," Ash replied flatly. He wasn't sure if he was being serious or not. "Not that he needs it, of course," he added, turning to Eiji and smirking.

"Understandable," Dr. Jaeger said. He looked through some forms on his computer before adding, "One more thing -- we're just starting to give out this year's flu shot. Would it be more convenient to have them now rather than go through the trouble of organising another appointment?"

 

Ash hesitated. He could cope when _he_ was given injections, it was when others were that he reacted. He offered to have his shot first, then take Aurora out to the reception area while Eiji finished up with Dr. Jaeger. Dr. Jaeger and Eiji both agreed that this was a good idea, although Dr. Jaeger raised another question as Ash picked up Aurora.

 

"Mr. Callenreese," he said, "Are your medications all up to date?"

"Uh, yeah," Ash replied, nodding. "No issues there. I think Eiji's fine for now too, right?" he asked as he looked at Eiji.

"Yes, I am," Eiji nodded.

"Wonderful," Dr. Jaeger said. "Right. That's everything, then. Aurora hasn't appeared to have reacted to her shots, so once Mr. Callenreese has had his, you'll be free to go."

 

Ash thanked him as he carried Aurora out of the room and went to find a seat while they waited. Eiji didn't take long to come and find them, by which stage Aurora had fallen asleep.

 

Something that not many people knew about Eiji was that, like Ash, he'd also undergone therapy. Initially, Eiji seemed to be fine, but Ash could tell that he was forcing himself. Ash, after all, had done the exact same thing for years. After pressing Eiji multiple times, he finally admitted to Ash that he was haunted by what he'd experienced while in America, and that it wasn't Ash's fault at all, because he'd made the choices to put himself in those dangerous situations. Ash still felt guilty, and although Eiji hadn't mentioned it directly, he knew he was talking about watching Shorter die. Eiji had also said that the feelings of almost losing Ash more than once stuck with him, which Ash could understand -- he felt the same when he thought about how Eiji had almost died. Which he tried not to think about.

 

Nowadays, things had settled down and were mostly under control. Ash still occasionally had horrific nightmares and sometimes got suddenly triggered by every day occurrences, but he now had strategies to help calm himself down if he was alone. Eiji had never disclosed exactly what he had talked to his therapist about, but there were plenty of things Ash had never told Eiji (which was partially because Ash found them hard to talk about, but he also didn't want Eiji to know what he'd been through), so they had a mutual understanding in that regard. It had taken Ash some time to find medication that worked for him, but it did appear to be helping as much as it could.

 

Medical insurance had been a pain in the ass, although they'd eventually succeeded, and Ash didn't care about costs because Golzine's leftover money was to be used in situations like that, since it was helping them be happy and live the life Golzine wouldn't have wanted Ash to live. And, Ash reckoned, it was mostly Golzine's fault that he needed any kind of medication in the first place, so the bastard was just paying him back, both literally and figuratively.

 

Since Aurora had been in their lives, Ash and Eiji had both been extremely stressed, yet immensely satisfied. At the very least, Aurora was happy, healthy and developing as she should be. She made them forget about what they'd been through, but she was also a reminder of the trials they'd overcome together. It was as if they'd finally been rewarded by the universe, Eiji had said, and Ash was starting to agree with him. While he still worried about their daughter, he was no longer scared that Eiji would be taken away from him. Eiji was here to stay. Aurora was, too. Ash was prepared to fight the entire world to keep his family safe, even if he did hope that he would never have to protect them from anyone.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Dr. Jaeger is based on who you think he's based on, lol. I'm lazy with names (which is why I don't tend to use them for the super minor characters). 
> 
> Also Christmas (again) next chapter. Depending on how I go, Aurora might get a very special present either next chapter or the chapter after that Ash doesn't exactly approve of... 
> 
> PS Professional help is important even if it isn't a magical cure-all.


	14. What is... That?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> After Christmas, Eiji brings up the elephant in the room: potty training! Ash reluctantly agrees, although says that they should wait until it's not the middle of winter, which Eiji thinks is a good idea.
> 
> One day, Ash comes home to a surprise and boy is he not happy about it!
> 
> Later on, Eiji has a request for him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> OOPS sorry for not updating this for a while, Mo Dao Zu Shi has held me captive for the past week, lol. Please give it a try if you haven't, Lan WangJi is phenomenal ;__;.
> 
> Also sorry that this isn't much, but things will happen next chapter!
> 
> PS Don't worry, the potty training isn't described! But it's too much of a thing to not include in some sense.

Ash enjoyed being home with his family again for winter break, even though it was short. This winter had been particularly cold, so they spent a lot of time snuggled up together, whether it was on the sofa by the radiator or in bed. Aurora was always in the middle, which Ash was fine with, although there was a selfish part of him that wanted to be cuddling Eiji without a small child getting in the way. But he got to hug Eiji a lot as it was, so he didn't mind.

 

Perhaps it was the colder weather and being kept inside more than usual, but Aurora frequently threw tantrums whenever something didn't go exactly as she'd planned it in that tiny head of hers. It was way too cold to go anywhere or do anything, even with a car, so they only left the house if they needed to stock up on food or other necessities. Aurora had also become an extremely fussy eater (which apparently was normal) and it was difficult finding things that she'd actually eat. What she would and wouldn't eat seemed to change every damn day, too. And this was not helped by her teething again, which they were admittedly slow to pick up on.

 

For Aurora's second Christmas, she received even more presents than her first. Her parents bought her several more toys, clothes and other useful items to keep her occupied. Eiji's family sent her a few more books and some traditional Japanese children's toys. She was also given a couple of hand-made accessories by Nadia: a beanie and a pair of mittens. Sing gave her a pair of shoes that lit up when she ran, which she absolutely adored. Ash wasn't very thrilled about them initially, but her laughter as she ran around their apartment quickly made those thoughts disappear. Max sent a package of homemade food for Ash and Eiji to enjoy (and Aurora too, since she could eat a fair amount of it).

 

* * *

 

 

Recently, Aurora had been even more interested in what her parents were doing. She still followed them everywhere, and it was getting harder and harder to keep her out of things. She tried to help them with cooking, but Ash forbade her being around knives, so she could only sit in her chair and watch them. Aurora, luckily, slept right through the night now, so there was no need to worry about her interrupting anything on the rare occasions something actually happened.

 

She seemed extra curious about what they got up to in the bathroom, probably because she was absolutely not allowed to follow them in there. Ash tried not to care, but he and Eiji tended to keep such things private even from each other (secretly, they both thought it was stupid, but neither wanted to bring the issue up just in case), and Ash also wasn't sure how he'd go about explaining things to a kid.

 

A few days after New Year's, while they were in bed, Eiji raised something important to him that Ash had been trying to avoid.

 

"...Potty training?" Ash repeated, once Eiji had explained things to him.

"Y-Yeah," Eiji mumbled. "Apparently you can start about now. She's been showing some of the signs of being ready for it, from what I've read..."

 

Ash knew he couldn't escape it, so he sighed and decided to voice his concerns.

 

"But it's cold," he pointed out. "Shouldn't we wait until it starts warming up again? I'd imagine that'd put anyone off..."

"Hmm, good point," Eiji replied. "Maybe we can time it so that we try around spring break, that way you're there to help out?"

"Sure," Ash said. "Not that I'll have any idea what I'm doing..."

 

Eiji laughed softly. "Ash," he said, "I don't have any idea either. Besides, we'll have to buy a few things first."

"Yeah..." Ash didn't really feel any more confident knowing that Eiji was clueless too. "But..."

"But what?" Eiji asked, his voice firm but gentle. "We can't keep putting it off forever, Ash."

 

Ash sighed. "Okay, look," he turned to face Eiji. "I know it's stupid, but: she's a girl. I don't know how they work."

Eiji blushed slightly, momentarily breaking eye contact. "I-I don't know how they work either," he said quietly. "But does that matter? We can learn. I'll research it and show you what I find. Does that sound okay?"

 

Ash paused for a few moments. He knew what Eiji was saying was right. They had the whole internet at their disposal to learn whatever they needed to. He didn't even really know what he was so afraid of. This was his daughter, after all. Surely it couldn't be _that_ complicated. Not if they both worked together.

 

"Yeah, that's good," Ash finally replied. "Sorry, Eiji..."

Eiji pulled Ash closer to him. "It's okay," he murmured. "It's... I'm kinda unsure of it too. But we need to do it. Aurora's clever, I'm sure she'll get the hang of it quickly..."

Ash gave Eiji a kiss on the cheek. "You're right," he said. "She'll be fine. We'll be fine."

 

* * *

 

From what Eiji had looked up, the best approach was to read children's books about potty training to them, so that was what he occupied his time with while Ash went back to work at the end of January. It was hard to know if Aurora understood the concept at all, because she was enthusiastic about anything being read to her, but she seemed to be paying attention, at the very least.

 

February was still too cold to do much (thus they didn't go out for Valentine's and instead had a good time at home), but Eiji started taking Aurora out again towards the latter half of the month.

 

One day, Ash came home to a surprise. He'd had a difficult day at work, it was cold on his commute, and the last thing he wanted or needed was something he wasn't prepared for at all.

 

"Eiji..." Ash said shakily, trying to keep himself calm but failing. "What... is that?"

 

Eiji was holding something in his arms. It was small and furry. Aurora, who had excitedly ran over to her father upon his return, looked up at him and beamed, "Doggy!"

 

A dog.

 

A fucking _dog_?

 

"W-Where did you... get it?" Ash asked, his throat dry.

"We found him," Eiji explained, patting the dog gently. "Some horrible person left him in a box. It's winter! He could've frozen to death, the poor thing..."

 

Aurora waddled over to Eiji and the dog and sat on the floor with them. Eiji showed her how to pat him.

 

Ash took several deep breaths. Logically, he knew that it wasn't the dog's fault. And Eiji had done the right thing by rescuing him. Eiji had a tendency to rescue things, after all. But a _dog_?

 

"...No."

 

Aurora and Eiji both looked up at him.

 

"Ash?" Eiji looked and sounded both concerned and confused.

 

"No." Ash repeated, his voice louder and firmer.

"D-Dada?" Aurora asked quietly.

"What do you mean by 'no', Ash?" Eiji's tone was soft and genuinely worried, but the way he asked pushed Ash over the edge. He'd had enough.

 

"Eiji," Ash seethed, "No. We're not keeping a dog."

"But-"

"NO!" Ash shouted, causing Aurora and Eiji (and the dog) to flinch. "NO MEANS NO! We. Are. NOT. KEEPING. A. FUCKING. DOG!" His voice grew louder with every word.

 

Aurora was frightened by Ash raising his voice, so she started to wail and hid her face in Eiji's upper arm. Eiji took his hand that wasn't holding the dog and gently stroked Aurora's head, whispering to her. Ash felt a surge of overwhelming guilt: he'd made his daughter cry. He wanted to apologise immediately, but he couldn't say anything. Aurora continued sobbing.

 

Eiji then turned to Ash, glaring. "I can't believe you," he said, sounding hurt. "Why would you yell like that?"

"I..." Ash had no idea what to say. There was no excuse, really. Even though he'd had a bad day, that was absolutely no reason to take it out on his family. Especially not a child, who couldn't understand why she was being yelled at.

 

Eiji continued to glare at Ash, while Aurora's crying grew quieter. Ash still couldn't bring himself to open his mouth.

 

Eventually, the puppy wriggled out of Eiji's grasp and trotted over to Ash.

 

Ash wanted to tell it to fuck off and leave him alone, but in order to not upset Aurora any further, he just said "W-What?" as he eyed the dog uncertainly.

 

The dog whimpered. Staring at it, Ash noticed that it was incredibly skinny and its fur was tangled and dirty. It looked like it had been abandoned for some time.

 

Ash took another deep breath and knelt down. "What?" he asked again, less accusingly this time. The dog wagged its tail and came closer. Ash tensed up slightly, wondering if maybe the dog wanted to bite him in response to his outburst. Instead, much to Ash's surprise, the dog licked the back of Ash's hand, which was resting on his knee.

 

Ash instantly stood back up, recoiling. His hand was covered in dog saliva.

 

Eiji laughed, which made Aurora slowly turn around and look at the scene. "D-Dada okay?" she asked timidly, scared that Ash might shout again.

"Y-Yeah," Ash said breathlessly, steading himself. "I'm okay. Sorry for getting mad." He addressed the apology to everyone else in the room, even the dog.

 

Ash glanced back down at the dog. He'd never owned a pet before, and the only dogs he'd been around were ferocious guard dogs that he'd always tried to avoid. But this _was_ just a puppy, so maybe it would be okay...

 

Ash sighed. "Alright, you win, Aurora," he said, smiling at her. Aurora blinked at him. "You want the dog to stay, yeah?"

Aurora's face lit up. "YEAH!" she squealed excitedly, seemingly having forgotten she was bawling only a few moments ago.

 

Eiji stood up and walked over to the others. "I'll take him to the vet tomorrow," he told Ash, picking the dog up again. "And if he's healthy enough, we'll keep him."

Ash nodded. "Do you have a name for the doggy, Aurora?" he asked their daughter gently.

 

Aurora thought for a moment.

 

"Buddy!" she announced proudly.

"Buddy? Where'd you learn that one?" Ash raised an eyebrow, amused.

Eiji chuckled. "I think it was the name of a dog in a book I read to her," he said.

"Buddy's a good name," Ash said. "You sure you wanna call him Buddy, Aurora?"

"Yeah!" Aurora exclaimed. "Buddy is Buddy!" She reached her arms up towards Buddy, so Eiji bent down to let her pat him.

 

Buddy's temporary bed was a large cardboard box lined with newspaper that had an old towel in the corner, along with a shallow bowl of water. Eiji informed Ash that they'd fed Buddy some cooked chicken to hold him over until they were able to purchase proper dog food after his visit to the vet.

 

Part of Ash secretly hoped that Buddy wouldn't be allowed to live with them, but he could tell how much Aurora was in love with the small, furry animal, and he didn't have the heart to take that joy and amazement away from her.

 

"Sorry, Ash," Eiji apologised sincerely once the two were in bed for the night. "I knew you wouldn't like it. But Aurora refused to leave him, and started screaming when I tried to get her to keep walking..."

Ash laughed. "I figured as much," he said. "It's okay. I... really didn't mean to yell like that," he sighed. "Some shit happened today and I'm tired. But that's not good enough, I know..."

Eiji gently kissed him. "Don't worry about it," he said softly. "I just didn't want Aarin to start crying earlier." He paused. "And thank you, Ash."

"What for?" Ash asked, wriggling closer to Eiji.

"For letting her keep him," Eiji said. "I think a dog will be great for her. She'll have someone to play with..."

"Yeah, you're right," Ash replied quietly.

 

* * *

 

It turned out that Buddy was healthy other than having an ear infection that only required antibiotics to fix. Ash double-checked with their landlord about the building's pet policy, and they said that dogs were allowed. Aurora was ecstatic about the news. Eiji was happy too, although Ash still harboured mixed feelings towards the idea of owning a pet. It was another life that would be taken from him eventually. But the vet had told Eiji that Buddy was probably a golden retriever, which live for over ten years, so at least Aurora would have a companion for some time.

 

Eiji had started potty training Aurora earlier than he said he would, as Aurora had become keen on always having a clean diaper and constantly bugged her parents (usually Eiji) to change her. Between Aurora's potty training and caring for Buddy, things were getting stressful again, and there always seemed to be messes of some sort to tidy up. Sing had gone to Hong Kong for a few weeks, but he said he'd look after Buddy once he got back.

 

They did things as a family for spring break, including taking Aurora to the park and local playgrounds now that the weather wasn't nearly as cold. Buddy tagged along with them, eager to catch whatever balls Aurora threw for him. Ash had, begrudgingly, warmed up to Buddy, and found that petting Buddy helped calm him down if he was worked up about something. Eiji was useful for such situations too, but there was something different about a warm, soft animal -- even if Eiji was basically one of those anyway.

 

As Eiji had predicted, Aurora was quick to get the hang of potty training. She still wore a diaper to bed, but had very few accidents during the daytime. She was very good at telling her parents when she needed to go, unless she was immersed in drawing with her crayons or wanting to finish stacking her blocks. Ash still found the whole thing somewhat embarrassing, but he was getting used to it.

 

Ash and Eiji both made sure to always encourage Aurora, praise her and let her do what she wanted. They did have to tell her off sometimes (usually when she tried to give Buddy her dinner that she didn't finish) but on the whole, she was well-behaved, apart from the tantrums, although those were decreasing in frequency. She was happy most of the time, and that was the important thing.

 

Ash was happy, too, even if he had bad days. He hardly thought about the past now that he was so focused on his family. Which was now four, not three.

 

Or so he thought, until Eiji brought up something that made Ash feel extremely uneasy.

 

"I know it's a lot to ask for," Eiji said slowly, "But I... There's someone I want to introduce Aarin to."

"Who?" Ash asked. "Your family? She's too young to travel yet."

Eiji shook his head. "No, not them," he said.

 

He paused. Ash felt as though Eiji looked almost... guilty?

 

When Eiji spoke, he spoke with an unsteady voice and didn't look anywhere near Ash.

 

"I want to show her to Shorter."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I feel like I've been a bit mean to Ash this chapter. My bad, lol. At least he has his family! (He is actually happy, I swear!)


	15. Sorry It's Taken Us So Long

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ash reluctantly agrees to take Aurora along to visit Shorter's grave, which they do (along with Nadia). Aurora is confused, everyone else is silently suffering. 
> 
> When April rolls around, Eiji comes down with a fever, so Sing has to look after the family for a couple of days while Ash is at work. Aurora is initially not cool with having someone other than Eiji take care of her, but she gets over it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Last chapter felt a bit too short to me, so here's one that's slightly longer! It's more angsty Ash though, sorry.
> 
> Also I think I fucked up with the dates and shit last chapter and forgot to include what Aurora's been learning to do but uhhhh oops?

"I want to show her to Shorter."

 

Ash lay there in silence. It was the first time either of them had directly said their friend's name out loud in over a decade. He wasn't sure what to think.

 

Since Shorter's body and later his brain had both been burnt, nothing physical of him could be given to his family for any kind of burial or cremation. He did, however, have a headstone dedicated to him in a cemetery that sat within Chinatown, along with the others who had died in gang violence all those years ago.

 

In truth, Ash had never once visited Shorter's grave. Not only did he feel like an outsider if he stepped into a Chinese cemetery, he couldn't bring himself to do it. It was his fault that Shorter had died, after all. Even though Eiji, Nadia, Sing, Max, Ash's therapist and everyone else Ash had spoken to about the matter thought that Ash wasn't to blame, he couldn't shift the overwhelming sense of guilt in his heart. Shorter's family had held a private service for him, which Ash and Eiji had attended, but Ash had had to leave half way through as the atmosphere was just too much for him.

 

As he was about to say something, Eiji spoke again: "If... If you really don't want to, that's okay. I... do understand."

 

If anyone could understand how he felt about Shorter, it would be Eiji. He knew why Eiji wanted to do this, and logically, he agreed. But emotionally, he wasn't sure if he could...

 

"I.." Ash began quietly, his bottom lip quivering, "I want to, too. I think... we should go see him."

 

Eiji hugged Ash tightly, squeezing him. "I'll ask Nadia if she can come with us," he said. "Maybe... Maybe Sing can look after Buddy for the day."

"Mmm," Ash mumbled in agreement.

 

* * *

 

Nadia agreed to accompany them to visit Shorter, and Sing agreed to watch Buddy while they did so. All they told Aurora was that they were going to visit someone and that she had to be on her best behaviour.

 

It was a warm spring Sunday. The cemetery was small and crowded with many headstones and graves, and Aurora looked extremely confused by it all. Nadia led them through the maze, and Eiji held Aurora's hand tightly. Ash kept his own hands in his pockets, looking at the ground the entire time.

 

"Here we are," Nadia announced, stopping in front of a particular headstone. Ash forced himself to look at it. On it, Shorter's name was written in both Chinese and English and it contained his date of birth and date of death. In front of the headstone was a small vase to place incense, which they had brought some with them to burn. Next to the vase, there was a framed photo of Shorter.

 

Ash had forgotten what Shorter looked like. The photo was from when he'd still had his dumb mohawk (had it really been _that_ purple?), and it showed him wearing his trademark sunglasses along with his stupid grin.

 

Ash wanted to get the fuck out of the cemetery, but at the same time, his legs felt like lead. He glanced downwards again, trying not to think about Shorter anymore.

 

Eiji was the first to talk: "Hi, Shorter," he said, in an extremely gentle, kind voice. "It's Eiji. Ash is here too. I'm truly sorry we haven't come to see you yet." He paused. Ash found his words hard to listen to.

 

"And... there's someone we'd like you to meet."

 

Ash finally looked up at Eiji, who was kneeling in front of Shorter's headstone. Aurora was standing beside him, curiously watching her father. "Aarin," Eiji whispered to her, "Go on and say hi."

 

Aurora didn't appear to understand what Eiji meant. There was nobody to say hi to other than the people already there, from her perspective.

 

Eiji tried again. "You can't see him, but there's someone watching us. He's in front of you."

 

Ash's vision became slightly blurry.

 

Aurora slowly walked forwards towards the headstone, her eyes locked on the photo of Shorter. She turned to face Eiji again, as if awaiting conformation. Eiji simply nodded at her.

 

"H-Hi..." Aurora said, uncertain.

"Tell him your name," Eiji whispered.

"Aurora!" Aurora exclaimed, pointing at herself and smiling.

 

"Shorter..." Eiji held Aurora by the shoulders, showing her off. "This... This is our -- Ash and my -- daughter. Aurora Midori Callenreese. She's nearly two. Nadia was gracious enough to bless us with her. Sorry it's taken us so long."

Aurora glanced up at Eiji. "Eiji?" she asked, looking worried. Eiji smiled and hugged her, picking her up in his arms. He turned to Nadia.

"Nadia," he said, "Is it okay if we burn the incense now?"

"Of course," Nadia nodded, pulling four incense sticks out of her purse, along with a lighter (which she'd said was Charlie's). She handed two to Eiji and approached Ash slowly, holding one out for him. "Here you are, Ash."

 

It took Ash a few moments to register what she was giving him before he took it and mumbled a 'thanks'. Nadia used the lighter to light her incense, and then lit the others with hers. The smell was subtle yet slightly burning if too close. Nadia had told them that the scent was sandalwood. One by one, they placed the sticks in the vase, with Eiji placing Aurora's for her. Ash took one last glimpse at Shorter's photo. He was close to crying now, and wanted to leave as soon as possible. If Shorter knew Ash was crying in front of him, he would most likely mock Ash for it and tell him to cut it out.

 

"Ash!" Eiji called, prompting Ash to snap out of his trance. "We're leaving."

"O-Okay." Ash silently followed them back to the car.

 

In the end, he'd been unable to say anything to Shorter in his heart, let alone out loud (whether he could even hear them at all or not was irrelevant). He couldn't even apologise. But as they left, there was something he was able to whisper, just for himself to hear.

 

_Thank you, Shorter._

 

Ash managed to hold his emotions in until they got home. Eiji had teared up in the car after they'd dropped Nadia back at Chang Dai, but Ash kept his lid on. Aurora reluctantly took a nap, and Sing said he'd return Buddy after _all_ of his humans had rested.

 

Eiji embraced Ash without saying a word. Ash didn't say anything, either. He knew that Eiji knew. Eiji knew that he knew. They held each other close in the hallway, neither of them making a sound until Eiji began quietly sobbing into Ash's chest, shaking slightly. This was finally what set Ash's own tears off.

 

He wasn't sure how long they stayed like that for, silently crying into each other's arms. Eventually, Ash pulled away and wiped his face on his shirt, sniffing. "We... should probably move before Aurora wakes up and finds us like this. She'll be scared."

Eiji chuckled quietly. "You're right, he said. "I'll start getting dinner ready. Do you want to let Sing know it's okay to bring Buddy home?"

"Yeah, I'll do that," Ash replied.

 

Aurora woke up from her nap not too long before Sing arrived. She was very happy to see Buddy again, and immediately went off to play with him.

 

"So... how'd it go?" Sing asked them carefully once Aurora wasn't paying attention anymore.

"Well..." Eiji began, taking ahold of Ash's hand. "She introduced herself. I'm sure Shorter got to see her."

"Yeah," Sing whispered. "I bet he'd spoil her and tell her how cute she is..." He watched Aurora flap Buddy's ears up and down, giggling loudly as she did so. Buddy was very patient with her and didn't seem to care. "But since he can't," Sing added, turning back to Ash and Eiji, "I'll have to do that for the both of us."

"Don't spoil her too much!" Ash warned, half-jokingly. "That's our job."

Sing laughed. "Good point! Oh, and -- I have a suggestion, if you don't mind."

"Yeah?" Eiji asked.

"Maybe you should take Buddy to puppy training school. He's pretty good, but since he's around a toddler all day, you might wanna teach him some extra discipline. Plus, he was abandoned, so..."

"That's a thought," Ash said. "That could be something you do with Aurora during the day, yeah?"

Eiji nodded. "I'll look into it. It'll probably be good for Aarin, too..."

"Awesome," Sing grinned. "Anyway, I'll get going." He walked over to Aurora, who was still fussing over Buddy. She looked up at him. "See ya, Aurora!" Sing said, kneeling down and sticking out his hand, gesturing for Aurora to give him a high-five (which she was good at).

"Bye, Sing!" Aurora chirped, slapping Sing's hand. "Say bye, Buddy!" she added, turning to Buddy.

Sing laughed again, giving Buddy a scratch behind his ears. Buddy made a noise of contempt. "Look at you, saying goodbye!" He scratched Buddy again before standing up.

 

"I'm sure Shorter would be happy for you guys," Sing said, smiling at Ash and Eiji as he stood by their door. "I know we all are, anyway. Everyone's willing to help, too. Don't forget that!"

"We won't," Eiji nodded. "You've already helped us so much, Sing. We can never thank you enough."

"Sure you can!" Sing grinned, patting Eiji's shoulder. "The only thing anyone's asking for in return is that you two are as happy as possible and living your best lives. Which I'm pretty sure you are."

"Yeah, we are," Eiji replied. "Right, Ash?"

"Of course we fucking are," Ash said, managing a smile for the first time that day. "I wouldn't settle for anything less and you know it." He gave Eiji a playful kiss on the cheek, pulling a face at Sing.

Sing put on a look of fake-disapproval for a moment before laughing. "That's reassuring. I won't worry, then."

 

He gave Ash and Eiji a thumbs up as he left.

 

* * *

 

Now that Aurora was almost twenty-three months old, she was becoming even more independent -- and helpful. She tried helping Eiji clean and fold the laundry, but for the most part just got in the way. She also wanted to groom Buddy every day (who was now going to puppy training classes once a week with Eiji and Aurora), but didn't really know what she was doing with him. Buddy featured heavily in her scribbles, and she always drew Ash and Eiji next to each other. They had recently bought some simple jigsaw puzzles for her, which she loved. She'd show them off whenever she finished them, seeking praise and feeling proud of herself.

 

Her vocabulary was increasing seemingly every day. She kept pointing to things and asking what they were, and constantly asked her parents what they were doing. She'd started to learn how to undress herself, but was useful but also annoying as sometimes she'd run around their apartment without any clothes on at night and take Ash completely by surprise. He tried to explain to her that she was only allowed to be naked in the bath, or if she needed to change into other clothes, but she didn't understand (or chose not to). Ash decided not to fight it too much.

 

Since the weather was warming up again, Eiji started taking Aurora back to the pool on days that Sing was able to look after Buddy. They'd enrolled her in swimming lessons, which she was enjoying, although Eiji had told Ash that he felt a bit awkward being the only dad in a sea of mothers. Ash said he shouldn't worry about it and if anyone complained to just splash pool water in their face. Eiji wasn't keen on the idea and berated Ash for being immature (although Ash had insisted he was only joking, Eiji wasn't entirely sure).

 

* * *

 

By the time it was mid-April, Eiji was already planning for Aurora's second birthday. Ash thought that this was a bit excessive, but Eiji insisted on doing something special. He wanted to invite the same group of people over that they'd hosted for her first birthday, along with Sing, who would be in town this time.

 

One evening after dinner towards the end of the month, Ash was standing next to Eiji while they were tidying up when he noticed something. (Aurora was in her highchair so that she couldn't get up to mischief and Buddy was lying on the floor next to her).

 

"Eiji, c'mere for a sec," Ash said, gesturing for Eiji to move closer. Eiji put down the plate he was washing and walked a few steps towards Ash, about to open his mouth.

 

Ash placed his hand on Eiji's forehead, then felt his own for comparison.

 

"I knew it. You're hot, Eiji." He took his hand away.

Eiji turned a deep shade of pink. "A-Ash," he muttered, "Don't say things like that in front of Aarin..."

Ash stared at him, astounded. In Eiji's defence, Ash _did_ like to tease him like this. "Eiji," he sighed, "For once in my life I mean it completely literally. I think you have a fever."

 

Eiji blushed even more at the misunderstanding before he touched his forehead. "M-Maybe," he said, removing his hand. "I feel fine, though."

"You should check," Ash suggested. "I'll finish washing up, you find the thermometer."

"Okay," Eiji nodded. Aurora watched him as he went to look for the thermometer. She then turned to Ash.

 

"Eiji?" Aurora asked, frowning.

"He'll be back," Ash told her, returning to washing the dishes. "I'll be done with this soon, then you can get out of there."

"Okay!" Aurora said happily.

 

Eiji came back a few minutes later with the thermometer, just as Ash was washing the last plate.

 

"You're right, Ash," Eiji said, showing Ash the reading. He did indeed have a fever. "But I can't imagine why I have this..."

Ash sighed again. "Eiji, it's because you're overworking yourself like I told you specifically not to do. Take it easy sometimes, okay?"

Eiji gave Ash a guilty smile. "Okay, you win," he said. "I'll give Aarin her bath and then go to bed."

"Make sure you do that," Ash said. "And just in case you're still feverish tomorrow, I'll message Sing and ask him to bring some cold medicine."

 

Eiji nodded. He freed Aurora from her highchair prison and placed her down on the floor. "Aarin, you wanna take your bath?"

"Yeah! Bath!" Aurora squeaked, running out of the room (hopefully in the direction of the bathroom).

"Aarin, wait!" Eiji called, glancing back at Ash as he chased after her.

 

Ash dried his hands off and walked over to Buddy, picking him up. Buddy was now pretty heavy, but he could still be carried easier than Aurora could (then again, Buddy didn't wriggle around as much). He carried Buddy with him to the living room and sat down on the sofa, placing Buddy in his lap.

 

After giving Buddy several pets and scratches, he took his phone out of his pocket and messaged Sing.

 

_Hey Sing. Eijis got a fever. Could u bring cold meds just in case hes worse tomorrow? Will pay u back. Might need u to look after Aurora n Buddy too if ok._

 

Ash petted Buddy some more while he waited for Sing to respond. Buddy helped him take his mind off things. He now had a proper crate in the living room, but sometimes Ash snuck him into their bedroom at night despite Eiji not wanting a dog sleeping on their bed (mostly because of all the damn fur that Eiji then had to attempt to get off the sheets). Buddy usually slept down the end of their bed by Ash's feet, unless Eiji could be bothered returning him to his actual bed.

 

A few minutes later, Ash's phone buzzed.

 

_al gud! wil come over b4 u go 2 work. wat time?_

 

Ash told him a time that was roughly thirty minutes before he left in the morning, so that they could establish plans for the day. Sing texted back a conformation.

 

Eiji came into the room, holding Aurora, who was now in her pyjamas. It was a bit earlier than her normal bedtime, but Ash could stay up with her if he needed to. Aurora said goodnight to Ash and Buddy (and kissed them both), and Eiji took her away again.

 

"C'mon, Buddy," Ash murmured, picking Buddy up again. "You should go to bed too."

 

Once Buddy was in his bed, Ash went to find Eiji, who was getting changed in their room.

 

"Sing says he can help out tomorrow," Ash announced, shutting the door behind him. He wanted to plaster Eiji with kisses, but thought that it wouldn't be a good idea if he really was sick.

"That's gr--" Eiji had to stop talking in order to cough a few times. He mumbled something in Japanese in annoyance.

"Yeah, you're sick," Ash said firmly. "Stop worrying about Aurora's birthday and about Buddy and everything else. You need to rest."

"I know," Eiji smiled. He coughed again. "Sorry, Ash."

"Dude, it's not your fault," Ash sighed, realising he'd sighed quite a bit already. "Shit happens. People get sick."

"Mmm..." Eiji mumbled. "I guess. I'm sure I'll be fine if I rest for a day or two."

 

Ash went to shower alone for the first time in a while, as Eiji was too tired. It felt weird, showering without him. But he wanted Eiji to get better as soon as possible so that they didn't have to rely on Sing's extreme kindness and selflessness for very long.

 

Since they couldn't kiss or cuddle together that night, Ash found it harder to fall asleep than usual. Eiji's coughing also made it difficult to sleep (and it woke him up once), so he was rather tired the next morning.

 

He made Eiji okayu (that rice congee dish) for breakfast, but Eiji could only eat half of it. He said he felt groggy and drained, and kept apologising to Ash for being sick. Ash had given up on telling him off for it.

 

Aurora refused to eat her breakfast.

 

"Eiji!" she shouted, banging her fists on the tray of the highchair. "Eiji!"

"Aurora," Ash said, sitting next to her, "Eiji's in bed. He's sick."

"Eiji!" Aurora shouted again. "Eiji food!"

 

Ash didn't know if she wanted Eiji to cook for her or wanted Eiji to feed her, but neither of those things were happening that morning. He groaned. "Aurora, eat!" He tried to give her a spoonful of cereal by gently nudging her mouth with it in the hopes she'd open it and eat. She refused and shoved the spoon away by pushing Ash's wrist, causing the cereal and milk to spill everywhere.

 

Ash wanted to raise his voice and scold her, but he knew that that was going too far. Just as he was about to try to get her to eat again, the doorbell rang.

 

"Stay there," Ash told her (not that she could even get out of her highchair). "It's Uncle Sing."

"Sing!" Aurora exclaimed excitedly.

 

Buddy followed Ash to the door. Sing gave him some quick pets as he was invited inside, closing the door behind him.

 

"Here," Sing said, handing Ash a plastic bag. "Cold medicine and cough mixture just in case, plus some painkillers. How's he doing?"

"He's in bed," Ash answered. "I cooked him breakfast but he didn't eat much... He's coughing quite a bit."

"Damn," Sing grimaced slightly. "And how's Aurora?"

 

Ash groaned again. "She won't eat her breakfast because Eiji's not the one feeding her. I think."

Sing let out a _pfft_. "You want me to give it a try?" he offered, smirking.

"She's all yours," Ash said. "I'll go give this to Eiji."

 

Ash fetched Eiji a glass of water, telling Aurora to behave herself and listen to Uncle Sing, not expecting much.

 

Eiji was sitting up in bed, looking at his phone. His face was flushed and he still looked unwell. He glanced at Ash as his husband walked over and sat on the edge of the bed.

 

"Medicine," Ash said, handing Eiji one of the pills and the glass of water. "Sing's trying to get Aurora to eat."

Eiji stared at him as he swallowed the pill. "Trying to?" he asked.

"She keeps calling for you and refusing to eat," Ash explained. "I don't think she likes me trying to give her breakfast."

Eiji started laughing, but the laugh turned into a cough halfway through. "And you're just giving her cereal, right?"

"Right!" Ash replied, groaning again. "Anyway, I should get ready for work. Sing'll look after you today."

"Take care," Eiji smiled, lying back down. "I love you."

 

Ash was about to respond when Sing entered, holding Aurora. "Success!" he gloated, smirking. Ash didn't know whether to be impressed ot jealous.

"Why do you listen to Sing and not to me, Aurora?" Ash asked playfully, standing up and walking over to them. "Sing isn't your dad!"

Aurora just giggled. "Dada work?" She pointed at Ash's tie, which he had yet to put on.

"Yeah," Ash ruffled her hair. "I'm going to work. You get to play with Uncle Sing today! Eiji needs to sleep. Will you do that?"

"Yeah!" Aurora nodded enthusiastically.

"Good girl." Ash kissed their daughter on her forehead. Aurora giggled again.

 

Sing threw Ash and Eiji a look before leaving the room with Aurora. Ash didn't say anything to Eiji as he got himself ready.

 

He made sure to thank Sing profusely as he left. He knew Sing would take good care of both his husband and his daughter. And his dog.

 

* * *

 

When Ash arrived home that afternoon, he was greeted by Buddy. Sing had left a note for him on the dining table (which they'd arranged during the day while texting).

 

_Hey Ash,_

 

_Had to leave to take care of something. Eiji & Aurora both asleep. Eiji says he's starting to feel better but will need you to make dinner. _

_Took Aurora & Buddy out for a while to a playground. They both had fun! _

_Aurora had an accident on the way home so I had to stop and change her clothes (Eiji told me to bring an extra set). She's okay though!_

_I can help out tomorrow but I have a few errands to run._

_Text me when you need to._

 

_Your pal,_

_Sing_

 

Ash paused after he read the note. Aurora did sometimes have accidents, so that wasn't an issue. At least it was Sing that had been taking care of her.

 

Aurora was fast asleep when Ash checked on her (he'd give her a bath after she woke up and had dinner), but Eiji was awake in bed. He said he was feeling slightly better but still had no energy, and that Sing had informed him about the day's events. Apparently Sing thought the accident was his own fault for not realising what she'd been complaining about, but Eiji didn't blame him (neither did Ash) and had explained that it still happened on occasion.

 

Ash made spaghetti for dinner, as it was a simple dish that they could all eat. Eiji ate more than he had at breakfast, but still nowhere near his usual amount. Aurora behaved herself and let Ash bathe her (despite it being something she usually did with Eiji) and feed her. He asked if she had fun with Sing, and she gleefully responded with 'Yeah!', so he took that as her not being worried about things.

 

* * *

 

Eiji was feeling better after three days of rest. He still had a slight cough, but his fever was gone and he had enough energy to take care of Aurora and Buddy again. Ash was extremely grateful, as he could now kiss Eiji once more and hold him close at night as he wished. They could also shower together again, which was comforting.

 

After intense negotiations, Ash had made Eiji agree to set all birthday planning aside. Ash had come up with a much simpler idea than a grand birthday party: a family picnic in Central Park. They still had a few weeks, but Eiji insisted on at least being allowed to put together a nice lunch for them. Ash agreed on the condition that he wasn't allowed to think about it until the week of Aurora's birthday.

 

The one thing Ash and Eiji both felt the same about was that it really didn't feel like it had been almost two years. Two years of living an amazing, joyful life. Even though there had been a few hiccups and struggles, for the most part, things had gone far more smoothly than either of them had expected, all things considered. But neither of them were complaining at all.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Btw, Lao's grave is near Shorter's but Lao can get fucked so he doesn't even get a mention. Ash would just want to piss on his headstone anyway.
> 
> Also if you thought I didn't know how to write babies/toddlers... I don't know how to write dogs, either!


End file.
